IF3

And so the group sat in their space station replica of home, and waited for some sort of threat to break out. Fortunately/unfortunately nothing happened. That is until one morning Nomadic Pyro noticed Club Bearer's cage had been emptied, and a note saying he had been kidnapped laid there for them to read. No one read it, and frankly no one cared at all. That was until Mono realized Club Bearer had Mono's Blockbuster video card... then the group decided to pull a rescue mission... for the card.
They looked over the note to find a signal for them to home in on to find Club Bearer. Using a gadget of Space Toaster's (he had to come in use sometime or another) they found the beacon and jetisoned to it on ST's repaired jet. When the became close to the signal, they found another ship, this one a large dome-o-chrome. The slammed the jet into it, and Space Toaster shot off a door into the dome ship for entrance.
Once onboard, this story begins to fill with detail once again.
"Alright now, lets find my card," Mono said as he cocked his shotgun. The group began to walk the halls of the ship until they noticed a familiar stench.
"Wait...could it be?" Homeless Man said. "Yes its...its Club Bearer's stench of inferiority! He can't be far off." Fast Guy then clicked his tongue as he winked and took off at insane speeds, designating he was in his "Too Damn Fast" mode of running, which endangered him into falling asleep.
"I'll check the air vents," Space Toaster said as he used a laser to cut a hole in the ceiling. After the hole was cut, the remaining shrapnel landed directly on his head and made him drop the laser, which cut a hole in Foom Man's uniform, but not him. Foom Man stepped on it as ST winced in pain, which crushed the laser.
"THAT WAS A $40,000 LASER!" Space Toaster exclaimed. Foom Man shrugged and dug his fott into the remains. Space Toaster then muttered as he climbed into the vent. Foom Man, after looking around for a moment, ran off with his cape flapping in the none existant wind and a determined look on his face.
Mono fell asleep.
And the rest did something to.
Fast Guy, winded, ended up at a large lockdown facility, complete with large and thick steel shutters. Space Toaster began smelling something burning, then realized the vents were being gassed! He quickly melted the vented with his super-heated hands and fell through the vents onto a cage. He gave the cage a once over, and saw none other than Club Bearer in it! ST attempted to melt the cage, but its space age fibers were to much for him. He looked around for a moment, and realized that the room was covered with security measures, such as laser motion detectors, and cameras. Club Bearer was asleep, shaking in a corner of the cage. Just then,
FOOOOOOOOOOOOM! A large steel shutter gave away to Fast Guy and Foom Man, standing behind it.
Space Toaster yelled out "Stop the door before it hits the ground!" With this, Fast Guy took off, and caught the door, not stepping on one motion detector, but unfortunately he had no enhanced strength, and gave away like a lawn chair. Fast Guy feel, door resting on his shoulders, directly onto a laswer beam. With that, the alarms began to blare.
"How come the explosion didn't set the alarms off, or the jet crash?" Foom Man wondered out loud.
"Just come over here and help me!" Space Toaster yelled as he jumped off the cage to the door of it.
"And all the cameras I've been seeing, those don't seem to affect much," Foom Man continued to think as he ran over to help Fast Guy up. Space Toaster began pulling at the cages bars, and even to the point where he put his legs on other parts of the cage to pull. He gave away, and feel over in exhaustion. Foom Man walked over, looked over the cage, then picked it off the ground to show it had no bottom of which Club Bearer was sitting on. Club Bearer, awake now, pleaded.
"WAIT!YOU CAN'T SAVE ME!" He yelled.
"Ok, bye," Fast Guy said as he took off.
"This line around me, painted on the ground?" Club Bearer said as he pointed to the yelow square pointed around him. "If I pass over it I become incinerated."
"That's bad right?" Foom Man said. Space Toaster nodded. All of the sudden, a group of robots came marching in, making very robot-like sounds as they approached. Each robot had four legs, spiderlike in a way, and two chain guns underhanging for arms. Their heads were T shaped, with two cameras at each end.
"Give up the unintelligent one," a voice echoed from the lead robot. Space Toaster pointed from Foom Man to Club Bearer with one finger and a confused look on his face. "The one with a foul stench." Space Toaster then nodded.
"NEVER!" Space Toaster yelled as he unveiled The Gun. As he aimed it, the dozen or so robots armed themselves up and got their chain guns rotating. Space Toaster jumped behind Foom Man and let him act as a shield.
"Should I, you know," Foom Man said as he motioned his hands towards the machines and made explosion sounds.
"No, you could rip right through the hull and make a vacumm," Space Toaster said as various bullet shells smacked off of Foom Man's chest and face.
"But the Fruit Loopian ship, its hull-"
"Shut up," Space Toaster interupted. Foom Man shrugged and took the bullets. He began to wince as another wave of robots arived, which now doubled their numbers. Foom Man took a step back, and looked around. He saw the cage, and winged it at a robot. The machine gun shells deflected it, and sent it right back at Foom Man, smacking him upside the head.
"Well shoot them or something!" Foom Man yelled.
"If I even begin to aim I'll get pegged in the face!" Space Toaster replied. It was then Space Toaster saw Fast Guy being apporached by a robot, with its guns rotating, heating up to kill. Fast guy was fast asleep.
"NO!" Space Toaster yelled. He then jumped over and punched the robot upside the face, and dented it in the process. The robot, somewhat unaffected, smacked ST upside the face and knocked him over. Space Toaster then shot his gun, and it emitted a ball of popcorn. The ball deflected, but landed under the robot's front left foot. The robot tripped, and feel over on the ground, as its machine guns went off. The bullets hit some wires above, and parts of the ceiling fell on two other robots. Space Toaster then jumped up, heated up his hands to fire mode, and torched the robot's head off. Three down, twenty one to go. Space Toaster looked up to see Foom Man barely holding on, now shielding his face with his hands.
Just then, a single large explosion was heard, and everything went silent. Everyone in the room turned towards the opening in the wall to see Mono and Homeless Man, Homeless Man weilding his sock as he spun it up to speed, and Mono holding a rocket launcher and a flamethrower. The two entered, unleashing hell and mayhem on the robots. After they were done, Mono collapsed from his semi tense position and looked around for Club Bearer.
The entire room was covered in dust and bullet powder, and Foom Man was especially tarnished. Foom Man moved away to show a perfect outline of himself behind him, with no signs of dust at all. There, Club Bearer sat.
"Yay!" Fast Guy said sarcastically.
"Ya," Foom Man said as he grabbed Club Bearer's hand. "We saved him!" With this last statement, Foom Man raised his hand and in effect, Club Bearer out of the yellow outline. Club Bearer dissapeared with a puff of smoke, and nothing was left besides Mono's card. Foom Man, in silence, picked the card up and dusted it off. Mono took it from Foom Man.
"Well, let's go," Homeless Man said as he laid the Street Special with a final thunk on a robot's trashing leg.

Epic Load One: The Annoyance Reconasance

TO BE CONTINUED IN EPIC LOAD TWO!