Short Back And Sides
The scourge of any train ride is the rodent-like stench from the phoney street sleeper on the shrapnel hunt
In the carrage he tries to catch your glance "have you got 10p for a cup of tea?"
Stare at my refelction in the window as the buildings blur by, invisible to me
Got to save my dough for morish pleasant hot air that sails right over my head
Routine short back and sides has the power to mentally paralyse
With a haircut like Joey Ramone you can really, really lower the tone
Let's strutt about all middle class, look all 90's BBC sitcom cast
Before the dawn of realisation hits you're in Mr Snips with your holiday pics
Proud, just an ordinary bloke, lager man and the Mrs has shorts with her kareoke
Polish right through those shoes, detests the vagrants spits, just useless junky winos
Look at him wrong and he'll fight you and probably lose
In the local casualty department bloodied, half conscious, adamently swear by a
Routine short back and sides, father used to tan our hides
Routine short back and sides, two weeks before the real you returns
Routine short back and sides with it's power will mentally paralyse
With a haircut like Joey Ramone you can really, really lower the tone
Assault charges to go, toe to toe, I know they'll see reason, smart hair
Sitting in that squeaky chair, little boys haircut, little boy staring back at me
Where's my father, my mentor, my guidance, here's the duty solicitor
Schoolboy flashbacks, snorkle coat fear, entrapment, lash out
Routine short back and sides then off to the park for the rides
Son with a haircut like Joey Ramone you know you really, really lower the tone
Get a routine short back and sides, strapped in, routine short back and sides
Fall off the slide, graze your knees, bawl your eyes
Routine short back and sides, father used to tan our hides
Routine short back and sides fall down and bawl out your eyes
Now in Mr Snips with your holiday pics and can't get to grips with those disposable bics
Routine short back and sides you are mentally paralysed
MtM 1995