author's notes: There is no money being made off of this. No infringement is intended. I only wanted to play in the playground that was created for us all by Bellisario and Company. All recognizable characters belong to them anyway. This is intended for enjoyment and enjoyment's sake only. I know this is short, and I have more already written, but I am using this as a teaser. I want to see if you, the readers, are on the same page as I am, and to see if anyone has a guess as to who's point of view I am writing in. PLEASE leave you guesses in a review.

I changed the rating of the story due to some rather colorful metaphors in chapter two! Enjoy!

Thanks to everyone for the reviews, they really make this all worth while. I appreciate them whether they are good or bad, but the flames really hurt. Luckily since I started writing JAG fics there haven't been any flames. I guess that means JAG fans tend to be a nicer bunch of people.

As always, please enjoy this as much as I have, and don't forget to read and review.

Always,

CapriceAnn Hedican-Kocur

2150 Zulu (4:50 pm local)
date unknown for now...
Somewhere near Antietam

Sometimes I sit here and wonder if maybe it could all be different. Could my life be any better? It definitely would not be any worse. I am dead after all, or at least that is what they would have you believe. I don’t know why or even how I am here, or for that matter why I am still being kept from my home, but I am sure on one thing. My captors are Americans, because only my fellow countrymen could be so cruel.

After my initial capture I was moved around so many times that I eventually lost track of where I was. I was finally able to get away from my captors, and for a few glorious months I lived free while trying to find a way home. I fell in love again only to have that love ripped away from me when I was shot, almost buried alive, and then captured by a whole new set of jailers. The second set of captors were the Americans. I could tell by the way that they treated me. I was dealt with as if I were a King, but I was still their prisoner.

It has been just over two decades since I last tasted freedom, and now I have a new chance. They have sent a new guard into look after me. They must think that I am too old and feeble to try and escape because this new guard is a young female. I mustn’t underestimate her; she is a marine, after all.

I doubt I will be able to escape, but maybe she will take me out for a ride. My jailers have done that before, but not in the last several years. Maybe I will even appeal to her sympathetic side, if she has one. It has been a long while since I last told anyone my story. I think I will tell her, but not until after I get a shower and a shave. As I thought about this, I realized that I did indeed need a shave. I was also wondering if she knew my son. I highly doubted that. It was just pure wishful thinking on my part.

author's notes: disclaimer in chapter 1. . .And I used the song Superman by Five for Fighting. I hope they don't mind me using it. I thought that the lyrics seemed to tie in with a certain flyboy. If the words are in italics then someone is singing it.

As always, please enjoy this as much as I have, and don't forget to read and review.

Always,

CapriceAnn Hedican-Kocur

2200 Zulu (5:00 pm local)
December 24, 2004
Somewhere near Antietam

“If you don’t mind me asking, why would they send a beautiful, young marine to keep watch on an old man like me?” I asked her.

“Hehehe.” She laughed. “My now ex‑boyfriend screwed up my life yet again. Only this time he also managed to royally piss my CO off at me too. He was mad enough to temporarily post me to this duty station.” She paused slightly and then smiled. “It is Christmas Eve, and I felt that since I was the low man on the totem pole, I offered to stay here this weekend so that they could spend the time with their families. It is not like I have anyone to spend the evening with, especially since my best friend, Harm, is back in DC with the rest of our friends.”

At the mention of the name Harm, hoped flared alive in my eyes once again. “I am sure that you realize that we are only a couple of hours away from DC. If we hurry we can still make it in time for you to spend time with your friend.”

“I am afraid that would be impossible, at least tonight. By the time we would reach DC, he would be at the Wall visiting his father.” She answered me.

I was startled at that, and I realized that it was time to let her know who I was. “If you will excuse me, I need to shower and change.” At her nod, I turned and walked into the modest bathroom that I had. Ten minutes later I was showered, changed, and clean‑shaven. I walked back into the next room, and I heard her gasp.

“Oh my god!” She started. “You can’t possibly be who you look like. Pitchta said you were dead.”

“You know Pitchta?” I asked, not really having expected her to know about my second love.

“We met Pitchta in Russia, when I followed Harm there.” She answered.

“What was Harm doing in Russia?” I asked, scared that I already knew the answer to that.

“He was trying to find you. Our search ended when we found Pitchta.” She paused. “She thought you had been killed when you were shot.”

“Will you take me to the Wall?” I managed to ask before falling quiet.

“Let’s get out of here. Can I ask you a question though?” She asked.

“Sure. I will answer anything you want to know, as long as we are in a car on our way to see my son. I have already missed so much.” I stated as we walked to her car and got in. “You aren’t going to get into trouble over this are you? My other guards have taken me out, but never were I might have contact with my son.”

“Frankly, I don’t give a damn what anyone thinks. I will resign over this if I have to, but I don’t think it will come to that.” She smiled at me.

“What question did you want to ask me?” I asked.

“I just wanted to know if you knew why you were being held by the US Navy?” She asked.

“No, I don’t know. They came upon Pitchta’s brother just as he had started to bury me. He did think that I was dead. Apparently I must have moaned or something, because the next thing I knew I was in some sort of hospital receiving medical care. They never would let me call home. I am still not sure why. Can I ask you a question or two?” I looked at her.

“Sure. What did you want to know?” She asked.

“I never asked before, but what exactly is your name?” I questioned.

“My name is Lt. Colonel Sarah Mackenzie, but all my friends call me Mac. Did you have another question?” Mac stated.

“Hmm, Sarah. That was my mother’s name, did you know that?” I asked Mac.

“Actually, I did know that. Harm named his biplane after her.” Mac said.

I smiled at the thought that he had finally restored that old plane. I was also very proud that he had decided to name her after his grandmother. “What else can you tell me about my son? Does he have a family of his own? Is he married yet?” At my last couple of questions I noticed a look of pain flash across her face, as if I had knocked the wind out of her chest.

“No, he doesn’t. I’m not even sure if he is even contemplating it anymore. He did however become a guardian to a teenage girl last Christmas.” Mac managed to say without breaking down.

“How long have you been in love with my son?” I asked.

“I’m not.” She stammered out. As we pulled up to a red light, she caught sight of my disbelieving look. “I have loved him from the moment he followed me into the desert. He was helping me look for my uncle Matt. My feelings were brought back to the forefront just recently when he resigned his commission to come search for me in Paraguay. I can’t seem to even forgive myself for not really telling him ‘thank you’.”

“So you still love him?” It was more a statement rather than a question I had just asked. “Do you have any clue as to how mush farther we have to go before we get to the Wall?”

“We’re here. See that vehicle over there?” Mac asked pointing at a Lexus SUV. When I nodded yes, she continued. “We’re in luck. That is Harm’s car. He is still here. Are you ready for this?”

“I have been waiting for this since Christmas Eve, 1969.” I said as we both climbed out of her corvette.

0100 Zulu (8:00 pm local)
December 25, 2004 (Christmas Eve 2004 local)
The Wall
Washington DC

I could hear my boots make a slight crunching noise in the frozen snow that covered the ground. I was walking as fast as I could without getting out of breath, but I still felt as if I were moving at a snail’s pace. I finally made my way to the edge of the memorial when I noticed him. I felt a light touch on my elbow, and I turned to look at Sarah Mackenzie.

“Do you want me to go to him first, or would you rather go to him?” Mac asked me.

“I want him to know that it was you that finally brought me back, not that dipshit spook of a CIA agent that has been in and out of my life for the past ten years torturing me with questions and information about my son.” I said quietly.

“Dipshit spook of a CIA agent? He wouldn’t have been named Webb by any chance would he?” Mac asked me.

“Yes, why?” I questioned her back.

“Not only am I going to kill that lying sack of shit I used to call my boyfriend, but I truly cannot wait to see how badly Harm will hurt him.” Sarah commented.

“I take it you two know him?” I asked, still staring at my son who I noticed had pulled out a guitar.

“Yes. He is the one who has always put me and Harm in danger’s way. He has also tried, rather unsuccessfully, to convince Harm that you were dead. So do you want to go in first or shall I?” Mac stated.

“Let’s go together, but ladies first.” I gestured for her to proceed me. “Besides, I am curious to hear what he is singing.”

We walked as silently as possible through the crunching snow. As we got closer to my son I could just make out his voice softly singing. I looked around; for once the entire area was eerily silent. No one else was in the area.

It may sound absurd...but don't be naive
Even heroes have the right to bleed
I may be disturbed...but won't you concede
Even heroes have the right to dream
It's not easy to be me
Up, up and away...away from me
It's all right...you can all sleep sound tonight
I'm not crazy...or anything...
I can't stand to fly
I'm not that naive
Men weren't meant to ride
With clouds between their knees

“Harm?” Mac asked startling Harm enough that he almost dropped his guitar.

“Mac! What are you going here? I thought that you had to be in Antietam for the weekend?” Harm asked Mac.

“I was, but I decided to bring my ‘job’ back home for the evening.” Mac stated as Harm stood up after putting his guitar away. She then leaned into him, and pulled him into a big embrace that almost knocked the wind out of his sails. “I am sorry to interrupt your evening, but I couldn’t wait any longer.” She stood up on her toes and planted a very deep kiss on his lips.

When they finally broke apart, Harm finally noticed an older man standing in the shadows behind them. “Sarah, who is with you?”

“Hehehe, it’s just someone else who has been tortured by Webb for the better part of the last decade. He wanted to join our club.” At Harm’s confused look, Mac explained. “Harm, when I got to my station this evening I was introduced to the man I would be guarding for the week. I had no clue who he was. I was told to call him ‘sir’, not that I would I have been able to recognize him anyway. It wasn’t until later this evening, after he had taken a shower and shaved, that I realized who he was. And it wasn’t until we were almost here before I realized that he had been Webb’s victim just as much as we had been.”

Mac motioned for me to step towards them. When I got a few feet away from them, I heard my son gasp.

“It can’t be! Dad?” Harm almost sobbed out the words. Then he said to both of us and to no one in particular, “I am going to kill that lying piece of shit!” Harm let go of Mac with one arm and reached towards me. I walked into his embrace.

“I never thought I would see you again, son. I am so sorry I left you and your mother alone. I hope you were both able to move on with your lives.” I said. “I didn’t want you wasting your life.”

“Mac, Sarah, thank you. I didn’t think I could love you anymore than I already did, but I do.” Harm silently whispered into Mac’s hair as we all split apart from the embrace.

“I love you, too, Harm. I always have. I think it just took seeing your father stand before me this evening to realize it.” Mac whispered back. “It’s almost 2020, if we hurry we can still make the tail end of the Roberts’ Christmas Party.”

“Won’t the Admiral be upset that you left your post, so to say, Mac?” I asked her.

“Looking back on the day he pushed me into this assignment, I believe that just maybe, he knew what was going on. His exact parting words were ‘I trust you will know when this assignment is over. Do not come back until then.’ I think he meant tonight.” Mac said as she tightened her coat around her.

“Sarah, if you are getting cold, then let’s leave. I’ll follow you back to your place, since it’s closer than mine. We can then go to the Roberts’ together.” Harm said.

“That sounds like a plan. Maybe we should go then.” I said as we all started back towards the cars. “I’ll ride with Harm.” We all climbed into our respective vehicles and sped off towards Mac’s place.