The Table and the Chair

Said the Table to the Chair,
'You can hardly be aware,
How I suffer from the heat,
And the chilblains on my feet!
If we took a little walk,
We might have a little talk!
Pay let us take the air!'
Said the Table to the Chair.

Said the Chair unto the Table,
'Now you know we are not able!
How foolishly you talk,
When you know we cannot walk!'
Said the Table, with a sigh,
'It can do no harm to try,
I've as many legs as you,
Why can't we walk on two?'

So they both went slowly down,
And walked about the town
With a cheerful bumpy sound,
As they toddled round and round.
And everybody cried,
As they hastened to their side,
'See! the Table and the Chair
Have come out to take the air!'

But in going down an alley,
To a castle in a valley,
They completely lost their way,
And wandered all the day,
Till, to see them safely back,
They paid a Ducky-quack,
And a Beetle, and a Mouse,
Who took them to their house.

Then they whispered to each other,
'O delightful little brother!
What a lovely walk we've taken!
Let us dine on Beans and Bacon!'
So the Ducky, and the leetle
Browny-Mouse and the Beetle
Dined, and danced upon their heads
Till they toddled to their beds.

--Edward Lear

The Tale of the Estuary and the Hedge

'Come,' said the small slimy
estuary pleasantly,
'come!' to the hedge that guarded
the door of the low-lying meadow.

'Follow me along my easy
course,' smiled the mud. 'Oh
your butter won't turn,
your daisies won't run!
I assure you, you won't be away for long.'

Doubtful, the hedge packed
its hawthorn blooms, sparrow nests
and ditchweeds neatly in a bundle,
to follow - with a guilty look behind:
Had the meadow noticed?

Hour on hour lazily
the little estuary
crept and curved,
the hedge trotting after.

The air became brighter,
new the birds that swam
or perched momentarily,
net-herps ousting ploughs
and the estuary gaining in girth.

Now, like an ambush
round the corner, the land
stops! The hedge is lost!

'It is The Sea - it it only
the sea,' smiles on the estuary.
'Don't be yellow-hearted! Come,
follow, I'll be leading you...'

--Libby Houston

Teabag

I'd like to be a teabag,
and stay at home all day
and talk to other teabags
in a teabag sort of way.

I'd love to be a teabag,
and lie in a little box
and never have to wash my face
or change my dirty socks.

I'd like to be a Tetly bag,
and Earl Grey one perhaps,
and doze all day and lie around
with Earl Grey kind of chaps.

I wouldn't have to do a thing,
no homework, jobs or chores-
just lie inside a comfy box
of teabags and their snores.

I wouldn't have to do exams,
I needn't tidy rooms,
or sweep the floor, or feed teh cat
or wash up all the spoons.

I wouldn't have to do a thing-
A life of bliss, you see...
except that once in all my life

I'd make a cup of tea.

--Peter Dixon

There Was A Maid

There was a maid on Scrabble Hill,
And if not dead, she lives there still,
She grew so tall, she reached the sky,
And on the moon hung clothes to dry.

--Anon

The Thief and the Shepherd

'Shepherdy, Shepherdy, count your sheep.'
'I can't come now, I'm fast asleep.'
'If you don't come now, they'll all be gone,
So Shepherdy, Shepherdy, come along.'

--Anon

Three Birds

Three birds flew in a clouded sky.
One was you and one was I
And no one knows the other.

The sky was heavy, soft and warm,
And off we flew to cheat the storm,
You, I, and the other.

The cheat the storm, away we flew;
One was white and one was blue.
A raven was the other.

We flew to far-off countries, where
Soft waters speak to brittle air,
Always with the other.

And there we bathed in silver springs
And shook the water from our wings;
And with us came the other.

And in those fair, enchanted lands,
We built our nest upon the sands;
And still with us the other.

And when we sand, the trilling notes
Like liquid, rippled from our throats;
He never sand, that other.

Three birds mount towad the sun;
One is you, and I am one
And no one knows the other.

--Gerard Benson

To a Squirrel at Kyle-Na-No

Come play with me.
Why should you run
Through the shaking tree
As though I'd a gun
To strike you dead?
When all I would do
Is to scratch your head
And let you go.

--W. B. Yeats

Topsy-Turvy Land

The people walk upon their heads,
The sea is made of sand,
The children go to school by night,
In Topsy-Turvy Land.

The front-door step is at the back,
You're walking when you stand,
You wear your hat upon your feet,
In Topsy-Turvy Land.

And buses on the sea you'll meet,
While pleasure boats are planned
To travel up and down the streets
Of Topsy-Turvy Land.

You pay for what you never get,
I think it must be grand,
For when you go you're coming back,
In Topsy-Turvy Land.

--H. E. Wilkinson

Torch

I want a torch with a handle
So I can beam a yellow disc against the sky
So I can play tiggy in the dark

A waterproof torch
So I can dive into caves below the sea
So I can light my toes up in the bath

A flashing torch
To warn away the smugglers in the bay
And send messages to my friend

A little torch
So I can hold it in my teeth and climb up trees
And shine it through my cheek to make it glow.

A head-torch
So I can be a miner miles below ground
Or a cyclops with a single blinding eye.

I want a torch
So I can shine it through my hand and see my bones
So I can light my chin to make my face a mask

So I can poke round all the corners in my room
So my hands can make a shadow-show on the wall

But most of all
I want a torch
So I can snuggle with it deep below my quilt
And read, and read, and read.

--Berlie Doherty

Trees are Great

Trees are great, they just stand and wait
They don't cry when they're teased
They don't eat much and they seldom shout
Trees are easily please

Trees are great, they like to congregate
For meetings in the park
They dance and sway, they stay all day
And talk till well after dark

Trees are great, they accept their fate
When it's pouring down with rain
They don't wear macs, it runs off their backs
But you never hear them complain

So answer me, please, if there weren't any trees
Where would naughty boys climb?
Where would lovers carve their names?
Where would little birds nest?
Where would we hang the leaves?

--Roger McGough

Tumbling

In jumping and tumbling
We spend the whole day,
Till night by arriving
Has finished our play.

What then? One and all.
There's no more to be said,
As we tumbled all day,
So we tumble to bed.

--Anon

Twelve Huntsmen

Twelve Huntsmen with horns and hounds,
Hunting over other men's grounds!
Eleven ships sailing o'er the main,
Some bound for France and some for Spain;
I wish them all safe home again.
Ten comets in the sky,
Some low and some high;
Nine peacocks in the air,
I wonder how they all came there,
I do not know and I do not care.
Eight joiners in a joiners' hall,
Working with the tools and all;
Seven lobsters in a dish,
As fresh as any heart could wish;
Six beetles against the wall,
Close by an old woman's apple stall;
Five puppies of our dog Ball,
Who daily for their breakfast call;
Four horses stuck in a bog,
Three monkeys tied to a clog;
Two pudding-ends would choke a dog,
With a gaping wide-mouthed waddling frog.

--Anon

Two of Everything

My friend Shola said to me that she said to her mum:
'It's not fair, Carla(that's me) has two of everything:

Carla has two bedrooms,
two sets of toys, two telephones,

two wardrobes, two door mats,
two mummies, two cats,

two water purifiers, two kitchens
two environmentally friendly squeezies.'

My friend Shola said to me that she said to her mum:
'Why can't you and Dad get divorced?'

But the thing Shola doesn't even realize yet,
is that there are two of me.

--Jackie Kay