JURASSIC PARK PICNIC
 TO: Teddy Bears Picnic

 If you go down to the park today
You're sure of a big surprise
If you go down to the park today
You'll never believe your eyes
For palaeontologists everywhere
Will only be able to stand and stare
Today's the day the dinosaurs meet the humans

There're Raptors there with nasty big teeth
Who like to hunt prey in packs
Who jump out of ambush from cupboards or bush
In sneaky surprise attacks
They're quick to learn to open up doors
And amputate limbs with horrible claws
Today's the day the dinosaurs EAT the humans!

The dinosaurs are locked up tight
Try as they might they haven't a hope of getting free
And just to make us feel secure
The staff have all sailed out to sea
The animals can't reproduce, if that's the truth
We should have a restful day
But dinosaurs who ought to be spayed
Are hatching eggs without getting laid
Because life will find a way

If you drive down to the park today
Don't give a hitchhiker a ride
Don't call him names or pound on your horn
And never let him inside
And he may look sweet and not very tough
He may be dressed in an elegant ruff
But today's the day the dinosaurs eat the humans

Who shakes the ground as she walks around
And is bigger than all the rest
Good old T Rex who will swallow up kids
And Lawyers and other pests
She may be big but her brain is small
She can't come to grips with a car at all
If she had a tin opener then she would be dangerous

Such Prehistoric fun there'll be
For you and me with creatures from ancient history
All scientifically produced
Now we've solved lifes' greatest mystery
So they've got a second shot at coming out on top
They won't be caged in zoo
And the airforce won't be round with a bomb
To send them all to hell
Because we must have a Park Mark 2!