Thieves seem to be getting cleaner. Last week, I reported that a bath was stolen from Lisa Davidson’s home in England. Mow, police are keeping special observation on the home of a 64-year-old woman in Waldhsut-Tiengen, Germany. Nothing is missing although there’ve been three break-ins. But the intruder, each time, has had a shower. "And what particularly annoys me," complains the woman, ‘Is that he keeps using my expensive shampoo." (25-May-1997)

Mario Dulceno says he has no intention of retiring from his work as a stripper at nightclubs in New Orleans. And why the Dickens should he? After all, he’s only 81. (25-May-1997)

A Dutch village plans to stage races for crawling babies this week, with three age categories between nine months and three years. But it has already run into trouble. "Irresponsible," sniffed the Amsterdam children’s rights group Child Right. "Kids of that age are far too young for competitions." Not so, say organisers in the village of Diessen. Parents are already getting their children into training. The prize: A silver shoe. (25-May-1997)

A museum with 20 antique television sets has been sent a reminder to buy a colour TV licence, although none of them are in working order. The sets at the Ryde, Isle of Wight, National Wireless Museum are all at least 40 years old, operate on different frequencies to modern sets and cannot pick up a picture. "Where the TV Licensing Authority got the idea we need a licence from, I don’t know," said a museum official. "We thought it was a big joke." (25-May-1997)

A French motorist is disputing a fine imposed by a police notice accusing him of driving at 980km/h – faster than a jet airliner – on a road near Grenoble. Pascal Cazy said police later sent him a second notice, correcting the speed to 98km/h. But the corrected notice had him driving in the wrong direction. "I think my lawyer can reasonably argue this was a mistake," he said. (25-May-1997)

Prostitutes in a Mexico City neighbourhood have agreed to switch their provocative bikinis for a look they say is more demure. Authorities cut a deal with Ana Maria Casimiro, leader of the sex industry in La Merced, after persistent complaints from local residents about the women’s outfits in a zone where transparent blouses and lingerie often rule the streets. "People didn’t want to see them naked anymore," Ms Casimiro conceded. The deal: Knee-length skirts, "decorous" trousers and "normal" blouses, while dropping 24-hour service to between noon and 10pm. Ms Casimiro said while many prostitutes had agreed to "dress well", others said the agreement would put them out of work – if they toed the line. (13-April-1997)

John Coute built a four-metre wall to keep thieves out of his home in South Africa. But he and his family returned from a day trip to find it had been dismantled and stolen. (13-April-1997)

Thousands have been butchered on the orders of Iraqi tyrant Saddam Hussein including seven of his own grandchildren, and he was branded as a ‘torturer and killer’ by the magazine Le Nouvel Observateur. Now a French court has rejected his bid to sue for libel although he claims this was a "slur on his good character". (13-April-1997)

Police issued a warrant for the arrest of William Scott Kern whose thumb print was found on the door frame of Rosa Parker’s burgled house in Baltimore. Now they’ve had to get it withdrawn by a judge. They’ve just realised that Kern is one of the officers who was there investigating the crime. (13-April-1997)

An accused carjacker armed with a Swiss Army Knife probably wished he'd picked on someone his own age. Instead of getting a car or money, police in Bellfontaine Neighbors, Missouri, said the 57-year-old got punched out by his victim, a 77-year-old woman - and cut himself with his own knife. The unnamed woman sheepishly admitted that she had bragged a bit to police. "I told one of those nice officers that if I'd had a few more minutes, I would've really kicked his butt." (20-April-1997)

Police have warned Rio guards to be on guard against women robbers who distract guards with plunging necklines, skimpy skirts and a disarming smile, Police say more than 20 women have participated in hold-ups at the city's financial institutions. According to witnesses and videotapes, the women enter the bank with guns that are passed to their male partners in crime. If they set off a metal detector, they flash a smile at the guard and pull out a cellular phone, key chain, umbrella or ball-point pen and then walk through. (20-April-1997)

Student Dean Gould (32) has claimed a record for licking stamps after he stuck 209 stamps on envelopes in five minutes at a post office in Norwich, England. He already holds records for pancake tossing and beer mat flicking. (20-April-1997)

Philippine President Fidel Ramos overslept and was an hour late for a ceremony to launch his country's Punctuality Week. (20-April-1997)

Never under-estimate female intuition. Suzanne Henley says she "just had a feeling" about a Las Vegas poker machine which, for major prizes, is linked to 746 others. That's why she waited more than an hour to play it. And then she scooped a world record jackpot of $18.3 million. (20-April-1997)

Italian quiz-show host Mara Vernier was horrified on live TV when an excited caller phoned in a correct answer - and demanded the prize of $90,000. The question you see, had not been asked. Writers had dumped it for another before the show went to air. Police say it seems suspicious. (20-April-1997)

Lars Buhler took pity on a man who, shocked at witnessing an armed hold-up, had a heart attack in a bank at Bern, Switzerland. He gave him the kiss-of-life. That's why Buhler was still there when police arrived. Within minutes he was under arrest. Cashiers identified him as the robber. (20-April-1997)

Our tax officials may make the occasional mistake but are brilliant compared to some in the US. A letter to Sybil Mollard, 47, in Los Angeles said: "We heard you may be deceased. Please come in with some ID and evidence you're not dead". (20-April-1997)