Grissom had never felt better in his life. He was in love with the woman of his dreams. They were going to be married and have a family. And he had just made a career change that excited him much more than he would have expected.
As he maneuvered through the traffic on the long drive back to Sara�s apartment, Grissom pondered more changes. With a baby coming, they were going to need more space. In addition, both of their apartments were in the opposite direction of the university from the lab. They should start looking for a place somewhere that would be convenient for both of them to get to work. Working part-time, he would have more of an opportunity to look around. They had plenty of time before the baby came.
Before he had left the WLVU campus, Grissom and Kevin DeWitt had looked at the calendar and determined that Grissom would take over the biology lectures in two weeks. This would make the transition easier and it would give the university time to find space for him in the Biology offices. It would also provide him the flexibility to give two weeks notice to the lab in order to clear up any cases before he left.
Grissom was pulled from his musings by the ringing of his cell phone. He quickly pulled out of traffic and answered.
�Okay, I�ve been patient for two days,� said Catherine. �I thought I�d find something out last night, but you both called in sick. What�s going on with you two? Is Sara alright?�
Grissom smiled. He had expected this call long ago. Catherine�s uncharacteristic patience was much appreciated in the middle of this period of turmoil and change.
�Sara had a doctor�s appointment this afternoon. She should be home by now. I�m on my way to see her.�
�You didn�t go with her?� Catherine sounded shocked and disappointed at the same time.
�I had another appointment I had to keep. We didn�t think to coordinate our calendars and scheduled our different appointments at the same time.� Grissom was purposely being ambiguous.
�But, how is she?� Catherine was fishing, but Grissom wasn�t taking the bait.
�She had another bout of morning sickness yesterday. But she�s been able to keep down some crackers and soup today.� Grissom knew it wasn�t fair to make Catherine beg for the information considering the help she had been in this situation. But he just couldn�t help himself. He felt too good about life today.
�Damnit, Gil, will you just tell me what I want to know? Is she going to keep the baby?� Grissom smiled at the frustration in his friend�s voice.
�Yes, Catherine, we are going to keep this baby. But for the time being, I need you to keep this confidential. I�m working on a remedy that should smooth out some issues that might arise at the lab.� Grissom suddenly realized that Catherine may have already said something and held his breath to hear her reaction to his request.
�My lips will continue to be sealed.� With resounding excitement, she continued, �I knew you�d convince her to keep the baby, Gil. I�ve suspected for awhile that you were the daddy type � even if it was closeted. I also know she�ll be a great mom now that she�s opened herself to it. Tell her I said so.� Catherine�s sentiments were heartfelt.
Sara was sitting on the sofa, literature spread out around her as Grissom entered the apartment. She held a pamphlet whose cover page flaunted a very pregnant woman, nude but made modest by strategically placed objects. Grissom had a vision of Sara looking like that in the not-too-distant future. He smiled. Sara looked up when Grissom threw his keys on the table on his way to her side.
�So, what did the doctor say?� he inquired as he moved the mound of papers to create sitting space next to her. He placed his arm around her shoulders.
�She says I�m pregnant,� Sara quipped. Shaking her shoulders, Grissom furrowed his brow at her. She smiled and continued. �Dr. Newkirk pronounced me a bit underweight, but otherwise healthy. She gave me tips on how to handle the morning sickness, a book on healthy vegetarian meals, a regimen of vitamins, and this mountain of pamphlets and flyers.� Sara spread her arms to indicate the documents scattered around her.
�I wish I could have gone with you,� said Grissom as he took one of Sara�s hands in his free hand. �I want to be a part of this pregnancy, too. We need to coordinate, make sure any meetings we have don�t conflict with one another.�
�You can come to the next one. I�ll put it on your calendar, since we�re going to coordinate appointments.� Sara gave him her signature pursed lips as she tried not to laugh. Grissom wanted to kiss those lips every time she did that. This time, he succumbed to the desire. Leaning in, he brushed her lips with his, a tender kiss matching the tenderness he felt for her at this moment. When their lips parted, he looked into her eyes and saw the love he felt for her reflected there. As she moved to lean against his shoulder, some of the paperwork fell to the floor.
�In the meantime, we can read all of these pamphlets and flyers. One of them is for prenatal classes. We should check that out.�
Sara began searching through the papers, a frown creasing her brow when she didn�t find it. Grissom took his arm from her shoulder and began looking intently through the literature as well. It was a futile gesture as he had no idea what he was looking for.
�Here!� Sara leaned down to pick up the blue sheet that had fallen to the floor. There was a cartoon at the top �Olive Oyle�s arm was draped around Popeye�s shoulder as he held Sweet Pea. Grissom looked over Sara�s shoulder as she read. �Prepare for the most amazing moment in your life! Whether this is your first or fifth pregnancy, this six week course will prepare you for what to expect on that day when you welcome your child into this world. The class will meet from 7:00-9:00 PM for six consecutive Tuesdays at the Las Vegas Women�s Clinic. Cost is $100 per couple. Call 702-274-7802 to reserve your spot.�
Without looking up, Sara asked, �Should we sign up now, or wait until we�re closer to delivery?�
�I can�t do this,� said a guilt-ridden Grissom, indicating the sheet.
Noting the tone in Grissom�s voice, Sara became very still, shifting her gaze to the floor. After several minutes of tense silence, Grissom cautiously said, �I�m sorry, but this just won�t work.�
Sara�s shoulders dropped. �I can�t believe I actually thought you were going to help me through this.�
Realizing that Sara had misunderstood, Grissom quickly stood, pulling Sara to her feet. He wrapped his arms tightly around her and whispered in her ear. �Honey, of course I�m going to help you through this. I only meant I can�t do this particular class. It�s on Tuesday evenings. I have a class on Tuesday and Thursday evenings.�
Skeptical, Sara pulled leaned away from the embrace. �A class?�
Grissom sighed. �I�ve done this badly. Let me start from the beginning. I went to see Kevin Dewitt at WLVU today.�
Sara nodded her head. �On the Watkins case.�
�Actually, I made an appointment to talk to him about a teaching job.� Grissom noted Sara�s stunned expression and hurriedly explained. �I�ve been wracking my brain, trying to work out our professional situation at the lab. How we could continue working there comfortably after everyone finds out about us. And I realized how very tired I am. I�m tired of the paperwork and politics and a lack of any kind of quality personal life.�
Grissom released his grip on Sara and they sat down on the sofa again. He took her hand and looked at their joined hands reflectively.
�While I was in England teaching that class, I was free of all that. The students were enthusiastic, the course was a challenge that I welcomed, and I actually had free time to enjoy the town. I can�t tell you how many nights I lay in bed thinking that if only you were there with me, I�d be in heaven.�
Coming out of his reverie, Grissom looked into Sara�s eyes and continued.
�So I went to see Kevin. When I worked with him on the Everson case two years ago, he tried to talk me into a teaching position and told me if I ever reconsidered to give him a call. So I did.
�The red tape required in creating another position will take some time. Longer than we have. I�m afraid I had to tell him about the baby because of the urgency of our situation. He offered and I�ve accepted a part-time position teaching two biology lectures on Tuesday and Thursday. If we need it, we�ll have to pay for insurance until I�m full-time. But it�s something that will allow me to quit the lab before anyone finds out about�us.�
When Grissom stopped, Sara looked at him in disbelief, her head slowly shaking from side to side.
�You�re upset?� Grissom queried in puzzlement. He had been so proud of the solution to their predicament.
�You made a decision that will radically change both of our lives without talking it over with me? Why would I be upset?� Sara pulled her hand from Grissom�s, her temper barely being restrained.
Grissom knew he was treading into dangerous territory.
�Our lives have already been radically changed. We�re having a baby! When they find out at the lab, the atmosphere will become intolerable � providing we don�t get fired first. If you want to continue working at the lab, we need to do something quickly to avoid any chance of retribution. Before our relationship becomes public knowledge.�
�And the only solution you could think of was to quit, without talking to me first? You didn�t think that I might have a way to solve this?� The timber of Sara�s voice was up an octave, signifying to Grissom that he had not diffused the situation.
�Honey, be reasonable.� He knew it was a mistake as soon as the words were out of his mouth. The sudden flash in Sara�s eyes and clenched jaw told Grissom he was now in serious trouble. She jumped up from the sofa and stormed away into the bedroom, slamming the door behind her.
Grissom looked at the closed door in amazement. It had happened so fast. What had he been thinking? Reflecting on his comment, he realized that it was insensitive to imply she was not being reasonable. Had he not learned over the past few weeks how emotional Sara was in her hormonal condition? He should have anticipated an extreme reaction, even without his thoughtless comment.
Especially since Sara was right. He should have discussed his idea with her before he acted. But the solution seemed so practical and perfect; he thought she would see it as clearly as he.
But this was not Grissom�s first mistake. With all that Sara had been through in her life, Grissom wanted to save her from any unnecessary worrying. In his attempt to shield Sara from excess stress, Grissom had hidden his increasing dissatisfaction with work from her. At first it was just little work annoyances that he contrasted with the happiness in his newfound life with Sara. He now had a life outside the lab and it was infinitely better than his previous life. Of course he was happier at home than at work.
But gradually, it had become more. The science of the job that he had once loved was now being replaced by the endless paperwork. The solemnity of death that greeted them daily had seeped into his psyche. Sara had no idea how much Grissom longed to leave the lab now that the opportunity had solidified in his mind.
In the last few weeks, Grissom had steered clear of Sara when she was upset. This time, he would be proactive. He needed to fix this.
Heading for the kitchen, he put on water to boil so he could prepare a pot of Sara�s favorite chamomile tea. While the water heated, he placed a plate of chocolate cookies on a tray. The one constant in the universe is that chocolate will quell the raging hormones of any woman. Adding the pot of steaming tea and two cups to the tray, Grissom slowly walked to the bedroom door.
Taking a deep breath, Grissom knocked on the door with his foot. Hearing no response, he carefully balanced the tray on one hand and opened the door.
Sara lay on the bed, her back turned toward him. Making his way to the nightstand, he cautiously maneuvered the tray onto the table while moving items out of the way. He poured tea into both cups. Sara was coaxed by the smell of the tea and sat up in bed. Grissom handed her the cup and then offered the plate of cookies. She took two and began munching, carefully avoiding eye contact with Grissom.
Grissom took his cup and sat on the edge of the bed next to Sara. He sat quietly sipping his tea, gazing at the floor. When he saw Sara reach for a third cookie, he looked at her to gauge her mood. He saw a tired calm that saddened him.
�Sara, I�m sorry. You�re right. I should have talked to you about my idea. I was taking on the responsibility of planning both of our lives. And that is now a shared responsibility, no matter how difficult the planning may be. I honestly thought I was doing a good thing, sparing you any difficult decisions. But I was wrong. I am a member of this team, not the leader. I need to remember that.� Grissom saw Sara�s expression soften, her body relax. She finally looked at him.
�Sharing. That�s what a relationship is all about. That means the bad as well as the good. We can�t be afraid of sharing anything, no matter how difficult. And we can�t judge each other or our actions. Like I did earlier. I�m sorry. I shouldn�t have been so�argumentative. I need to work on this, too. We can handle anything if we do it together.� Sara entwined her fingers with Grissom�s to emphasize her point.
Grissom brought their joined hands to his lips and kissed Sara�s hand. �There is something I haven�t shared that I should.� Sara looked apprehensively into Grissom�s eyes. �I haven�t been happy at the lab for awhile. The politics and paperwork have pummeled me to the point that I don�t enjoy what I do anymore.
�I want to love my work again. I need to find the satisfaction in my professional life that will get me out of bed in the morning. Right now, I just want to stay in bed with you.� They both giggled at the implications of the comment.
�I�ve always enjoyed instructing people. Perhaps that�s part of my dissatisfaction at the lab. I�ve taught you and the rest of the team all I can. I no longer have that outlet in my work there. This teaching job will give me the opportunity to do what I enjoy. And it gives you the chance to continue working at the lab, which you still love, without the strain of office gossip and innuendo. It seems like a perfect solution.
�But, it may not be. If you have a different solution to consider, let�s put it on the table and discuss the pros and cons of both. This needs to be a decision we both can live with.�
Sara leaned forward and cupped Grissom�s cheek with her free hand. �I should have known you were unhappy. A woman should sense that in her man.�
Grissom leaned into her hand. �No, I worked hard to conceal it. Which really wasn�t that hard. I was working with you. Being with you makes me happy, in spite of the circumstances. That�s one thing I�d really miss.�
Sara nodded. �When I think about it, that�s why it upsets me to think of you gone from the lab. I won�t get to work with you, see you every night even when we don�t work a case together. I�ll miss your input and perspective. I�ll miss you.�
Sara sighed. �I have no better solution to offer that satisfies the issues effectively. If you are unhappy at the lab, this seems like the perfect opportunity to leave, while simplifying our relationship issues at work.�
Sara chuckled. �So, it seems that I will be the wife of a professor. Don�t expect me to wear any dowdy dresses or attend faculty wives� functions. That is so not me. And don�t even think about hiring some cute young Teaching Assistant. I know how those things end up.�
Grissom laughed and crawled into bed with Sara, snuggling close. �You never have to worry about that. You�re all the woman I�ll ever need. Now, let�s get some sleep. You can help me work on my resignation letter when we get up.�
�Unless I have other ideas,� said Sara suggestively wiggling her eyebrows.