Grissom sat in the rental car. Now that he was here, he didn�t know what to do.
After his night of� inadequacy, he had been certain of the proper course of action. Sara deserved more. She would move on if he ignored her, treated her like the ass he was. It had taken longer than he expected, but she had responded - in a way he hadn�t expected. She had left, had physically moved on. He had assumed she would emotionally move on, but still be at the lab. He could still be near her, see her on a daily basis. But she had left. And a part of him died inside. He was willing to make the sacrifice, knowing that Sara was moving on to a better life. When you loved someone, you were willing to suffer torture for the rest of your life if it brought them peace.
And then Catherine butt in and disrupted his certainties. She tried to convince him that sex doesn�t matter, that his love for Sara, and her love returned is what really matters. He wanted to believe Catherine. He wanted to believe that he and Sara could have a life together despite his inability to keep up with her sexually. But he had seen to much in his fifty years of life to believe that love could conquer all. After 18 hours of uninterrupted sleep, he had come to his senses and tried to forget the conversation.
Lindsay�s bombshell that they had actually seen Sara had unnerved him. The intensity of Catherine�s insistence that he see Sara unnerved him even more. There was something she wasn�t telling him. And it scared him. Enough to bring him to Tamales Bay.
Grissom took a deep breath and opened the car door. He was only vaguely aware of the beauty of the location as he walked to the entrance and through the handcrafted doors. Just inside the entrance, he saw Sara sitting at a desk and talking on the phone, apparently booking rooms for future guests. When she looked up to see who had entered, she stopped in mid-sentence. After a moment, she regained her composure and responded into the phone, �Yes, I�m still here. I�m sorry, I was distracted by a guest. I�ll put a confirmation in the mail to you tomorrow, Mrs. Gilbraith. We�ll see you on the 15th. Good bye.�
Sara�s eyes returned to Grissom as he approached her.
�How are you, Sara?�
�Surviving. So much for Catherine�s integrity.�
�Catherine did not tell me anything. Which is why I�m here. She wouldn�t tell me anything and I was worried. Lindsay told me she had seen you and where you were.�
�Ok, you�ve seen me. I�m fine. Now you can go back.� Sara lowered her eyes and pretended to go back to work.
Grissom sighed and turned to leave. He took two steps, and stopped.
�NO.�
Sara looked up startled.
�I came here to make sure you were OK. You tell me that you are fine. I trust you, just as I always have. But you need to know something, something I should have told you the morning after�� Grissom paused and started anew. �Sara, Catherine believes that you would be comforted to know the truth about�� Grissom shook his head, frustrated by his inability to verbalize his feelings. He took a deep breath.
�I love you. I love you more than life itself. Which is why I can�t be with you. You deserve a man who can give you everything you desire, not...� Grissom looked around to see who might be listening �� an old man with no stamina, interested only in bugs, and you.
�I should have explained that to you instead of acting like our night together wasn�t important. Like it wasn�t a dream come true. Even if it did come true to soon, it was the most important night of my life.�
�Grissom, what the hell are you talking about?�
�Premature ejaculation is an insult to you Sara. And I am not about to insult you again.�
Sara stared at Grissom, mouth open. She wanted to laugh, but knew for Grissom, this was not a laughing matter. She thought a moment, contemplating how to best phrase her response.
�Grissom, in your vast sexual experience, have you and your partner always climaxed together?�
�In my less than vast experience, until six months ago, yes. It�s not you, Sara, believe me. I�m getting older. It happens to older men.�
�And younger men,� Sara said with a snicker. �Grissom, I am in awe at your amazing track record. And your naivet�. I don�t think my sexual experience is vast. But I do know a few things from experience. Stimulation is different each time one has�an encounter. One�s mood, recent sexual activities, alcohol, lot�s of things contribute. It is not uncommon for couples to climax separately. In the physical sense. But if a couple is truly making love, each experiences the climax of their partner whether together or separate. So our one amazing night together, I had two climaxes � yours and mine. I�d like to think you did the same.�
Grissom stood still for a long time in thought. His world had suddenly flipped on its side. His very limited sexual exploits did not afford him an expertise in the field. But what Sara said made sense. And if that was the case, maybe there was a chance for them. Maybe they had a chance regardless. Because despite it all, she loved him. One look into her eyes told him that. Grissom smiled and nodded his head.
�Sara Sidle, you are one smart woman. Even smarter than I realized. Please, come back to Vegas. Give me the chance to show you how much I love you. Give us another chance.�
Sara just sat there smiling, tears pooling in her eyes. Grissom moved around the desk to take her in his arms. She stood at the same time and melted into his embrace, their lips meeting.
But the kiss didn�t last long. Grissom immediately pulled back and held Sara at arms length. He looked at her swollen abdomen. His mouth dropped.
�I thought you were on the pill?�
�Apparently the dosage was enough to regulate my cycle but not enough to prevent pregnancy.�
�You weren�t going to tell me?�
�No.�
�Am I not the father? Didn�t I deserve to know?�
�I�ve already had this conversation with Catherine. How could I tell you we were going to have a baby when you apparently didn�t want anything to do with its mother? It would seem like a trick to get you. I wouldn�t put myself through that.�
Grissom stood for a moment in thought, then took Sara in his arms in an embrace that she thought would never end. �I�ve put you through hell, haven�t I? I really don�t deserve you.�
�Well you�ve got me now, like it or not. Perhaps it�s time you met my mother.�