Title: Don't Think of Me
Name: Raven Marie (Lovesbitch)
Pairing: Mi/L
Rating: PG-13
Discalimer: I do not own Roswell, that belongs to Katims. Nor do we own Dido or her musical talent.
Summary: Songfic. Dido's "Don't Think of Me" Tess's POV.
Spoilers: Depature

Don't Think of Me

So You're with her, and not with me
I hope she's sweet, and so pretty
I hear she cooks delightfully
A little angel beside you
So you're with her, and not with me
Oh how lucky one man can be
I hear your house is smart and clean
Oh how lovely with your homecoming queen
Oh how lovely it must be
When you see her sweet smile baby
Don't Think of Me
When she lays in you warm arms
Don't Think of Me
So you're with her, and not with me
I now she spreads sweet honey
In fact your best friend
I heard he spent last night with her
Now how do you feel
When you see her sweet smile baby
Don't Think of Me
When she lays in your warm arms
Don't Think of me
And it's to late and it's too bad
Don't Think of Me
Oh it's too late and it's too bad
Don't Think of Me
Does it bother you now
All the mess I made
Does it bother you now
All the angry games we played
Does it bother you now
when I'm not there
When you see her sweet smile baby
Don't Think of Me
When she lays in your warm arms
Don't Think of Me
And it's too late and it's too bad
Don't think of Me
And it's too late and it's too bad
Don't Think of Me

He chose her over me. So I'm going home, our real home, alone. Not that I'm surprised. I should have known my happiness with Max was short lived. He would always belong to her.

He was my husband, he was supposed to love me, not her! But he always took her side, always loved her more. She was his angel, something pure and precious in his eyes.

I hope he's happy with her. Because that pure and precious angel of his was his downfall. He's blinded by his own love. She could get him to do anything she wanted with just a small smile and when he holds her in his arms he belongs to her alone. And he won't be thinking of me when he presses his lips against hers because he loves her too much to be thinking of someone else. I loved him like that. I truly did.

But he betrayed me. He turned against me because of her. We would have gone home together and all of this would have been over. He would have forgotten about her and the rest of them and he would have loved me like that.

But she had to rush in and screw everything up. Because she wanted them to stay. And she told them the truth. They weren't supposed to find out the truth. It would have been less painful for them.

But they did and I told Max the truth. I didn't mean to kill Alex. It had been an accident and I would take it back if I had the chance. And he turned on me. He betrayed me, his own wife, his lover. He hurt me so bad. So I wanted to hurt him.

So I made up that stupid lie because I was blinded by pain. I wanted him to feel as betrayed as I felt. So I told him that I was going to betray him and Michael and Isabel.

I knew he wouldn't kill me, even when he placed his hand to my face with that anger in his eyes. He wouldn't be able to end my life without killing our son. And he loved our son too much to do that. Not that he'll ever get to see him.

I should have just left without trying to get my revenge because he's already being betrayed by the woman he loves. And her betrayal isn't a lie.

Like I said, Max was blinded by his love. He can't see anything evil or tainted about Liz because she's his little angel. But I do.

I see the way she looks at Michael. She did love Max once, I won't lie about that, but somewhere along the line she fell in love with Michael. But Max depends on her, whether or not they are together. And she knew that. So she never spoke a word of her true feelings.

At least not until after she saw Max and I kissing. I'm not sure how it came out or when. Maybe a little after Alex's death when she was the weakest. It doesn't really matter when, just that it happened.

I knew Michael had felt the same for her before she did. It was harder to notice with Michael. He didn't have those looks of love directed towards her at first. It was little things that most people simply overlooked unless you were looking for them. And I was. It would have been perfect if the two had actually admitted they cared for each other.

Michael and Isabel obviously weren't getting together and I didn't really care whether or not they did. But if Michael and Liz had been together, there would be nothing standing between me and Max being together.

But in the end, I got him without the help of Michael or Liz. Even if it was only for a short while. He went back to his angel with the sweet smile and warm arms. He doesn't realize what he's really going back to.

I don't hate Liz. I envy her, if anything. She has the love of two men.

Michael stayed for her, not Maria, like Max and everyone else will believe. And Max doesn't realize I saw more than just his kiss with Liz in the flash. I knew he had asked her if she really had slept with Kyle. And I knew why she didn't speak. I could see the fear in her eyes that he would discover that she had been with Michael. Because part of her will always love him.

So he'll go on holding her and loving her but she won't be able to hide the truth from him forever. He'll find out someday that his best friend and his girl betrayed him. And he'll know how I feel.

But it's too late and it's too bad because I can't change what happened and what will. And as much as I wanted him to suffer when I spat those lies at him, the anger is fading. And I'm feeling more and more alone.

He didn't hear the last words I said to him as he slipped out of the cave. Because I still love him and I don't want him to hurt. And I know I hurt him enough. So I pray that Liz can keep her affair with Michael a secret and Michael listens to my final words. Because even though he didn't hear them with his ears, I could feel that he sensed them. Those four small words.

Don't think of me.

The End