Columns by Mike Crowl, from the Dunedin Star Midweeker, Dunedin, New Zealand

Column Eight - 26th Oct, 1994

Pettifogging Fisticuffs

Since I wrote this piece over ten years ago, things have only got worse.    Now, it's not only the players
who are involved in fights and abuse.   At junior level games, spectators are also getting involved.  

Remember the saying 'real men don't eat quiche?' It inferred that real men were too tough to get into food that melted in your mouth. In other words, no males eating fluffy-food needed to apply for the 'real man' brigade.

I think the saying should now be amended to 'real men don't play rugby.' Perhaps that broad statement needs a little qualification. A few real men play rugby, but they're getting harder and harder to see amongst the pack of scruffs who've been performing on the fields the last few seasons.

I don't suppose rugby ever qualified as a gentle man's game - there's always been a rough edge to it. But these days there's no way you'd think of it as a game for gents: the rugby field's become a place where galoots with weight to throw around think their weight's the main reason they're in the team.

If someone else gets in your way, poke him in the snout, or pull his arm off, or throttle him. What do you mean, tackle him? That's for quiche-eating sissies.

My biggest concern with all these lumps whose brains reside in their fist is the effect they're having on the up-and-coming generation of footballers.

Kids are learning a mindset regarding this game: the opposing team's only there to walk over. In fact, if you don't get in first, they'll demolish you. Hang the game: this is warfare.

I'm appalled by kids who think that rucking someone's face or head or torso or let is the way to play rugby. I cringe when kids consider that injuring the opposition is part of the game. I even hear about kids who go into the scrum determined to punch someone's lights out so as to put them out of the action.

Where do they learn all this? Do their coaches teach them? I don't think so.

It's not long since we used to see an advert on television where an aggressive young player in the changing rooms was told he wasn't going to play because he had the wrong attitude.

The philosophy behind that advert no longer impacts on the minds of the kids out on the fields. Aggression and ugly play are getting to be the norm.

And why? The answer's obvious. Refs spend countless minutes in games these days sorting out adults who can't control their tempers or fists. They're forced to waste the time of paying spectators because so-called top players get steamed up over nothing and don't have the self-control to behave on the field. And half the time it's fully televised for all the nation to see.

The skills of good rugby players are going down the tubes because they've forgotten their purpose is to play a game, not have a fight. If these players are so much into fighting, send them into a boxing ring. At least there people expect you to knock your brains into sludge.

Let's leave fisticuffs off the football field.

I struggle to persuade the rugby enthusiasts in my family (with the exception of the Aged Parent) that doing serious damage to other players is not the norm. They see it all the time now and see the best-known players getting into it. If those heroes do it, it must be okay.

Does the pressure of playing rugby, or the hype of a championship final, or the state of the ground really cause grown men to fling their fists about? I don't think so.

And will hitting the pockets of the players with a fine really tackle the problem? Coughing up cash is the easy way out.

I think these guys need to be hit where it hurts: ban them from the game, not just for a few weeks, but for a full season. Put them on the back burner and see if some sense of shame starts to seep into their system.

So what if they're big-time rugby stars? In the future, are most fans going to remember Richard's Loe's playing, or the way he eye-gouged Greg Cooper?

And while these guys are out of it, let them do a bit of community work with people who find being battered isn't so macho. And perhaps they could write a few essays for general publication on why they think a lack of self-control is so vital to their game, or how they reckon young players can avoid being influenced by their petulant behaviour.

Unfortunately, I don't think the NZRFU has the guts to turn these players into real men.

Richard Loe played for the All Blacks for a short period.   He's still remembered for being one of the earlier players to bring nasty touches to the sport.   Since then we've seen neck-breaking high tackles, testicle-grabbing, hitting men when they're down, and, wait for it, a finger up someone else's bum.   All visible on television.   [Back]

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