BRACEFACES
It was a long time after the war had ended and the G-boys were getting a well
deserved break from all kinds of trouble, tensions and messes!
[SCREEEECHHH] CRASH...well almost all of them.
�DUOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!� howled Quatre, his voice echoing through the
hallways.
*****
Duo skidded and rushed inside Heero's room and slammed the door shut.
�What now?� Heero said in his usual unemotional tone.
�HE'S GONNA KILL ME� Duo wailed.
�Who?� Heero asked though not surprised. It was not a bizarre thing for him to
believe that people wanted to kill Duo Maxwell. Almost everyone wanted to
strangle the pilot of Deathscythe out of existence since he was annoying! And
they clearly showed signs of it!
�King Kong!! Duhh!! Quatre who else� Duo said calmly.
Just as Heero was about to reply, Quatre kicked the door open, and squashed Duo
who was behind it.
�Where is he?� Quatre asked in a low but dangerous tone of voice, continuing to
squeeze poor Duo who was behind the door.
Heero, seeing Duo being squished behind the door, decided to let him off the
hook...... for once.
�He�s bound to be massacred someday� Heero thought. �Oh well��
�He just jumped out the window� Heero replied pointing towards the open window.
�He wha......oh i forgot its the 1st floor.......well might as well have Wufei
hunt for him he's good at it......no wait I�ll free the dogs and not let Duo get
in....Mwahahahahahah� Quatre said as he laughed at his diabolical plan.
Quatre left continuing his demonic laughter, Trowa who was just passing by,
thought he was being taken over the Zero system again.
Back in Heero's room, Duo fell on the floor face wards.
�Okay what did you do?� Heero said with a little curiosity.
Duo locked the door and said �I ran the limo into the wall�
�How did you get the keys?� Heero said raising one eyebrow, if there was one
thing next to the other that Quatre would hide from Duo that would be the cars
keys!
Duo who understood every facial expression of Heero's by now, said �I snatched
the keys from Quatre with a fishing rod, I guess he forgot to put it back in the
storeroom�.
*******
After a little while when Quatre had cooled down, every one was busy doing
something, Quatre was upstairs in his room checking for any messages on the
phone, Trowa and Wufei were playing chess and Duo, who was a loser at chess was
guiding Wufei, who kept crying� INJUSTICE......THIS IS 100% IN JUSTICE.....I
REFUSE TO PLAY WITH NON-LIVING WEAKLINGS"
Heero.....Heero was just sitting there as if he didn't exist, just then Quatre
ran into the living room, apparently out of breath
�HIDE....... (Pant!) ... (Puff!)...RUN WHILE THERE'S STILL HOPE.... (Pant).....
(Puff)....� He cried at the top of his lungs, which were out of air.
Everyone stood there silently for minutes.....yes even Duo, staring at Quatre
�Okay in easy words...RELENA'S COMING!!!!!!� he cried. This sure helped a lot.
In a matter of minutes the whole mansion was empty.
*******
Heero was the first one to evacuate......he jumped in Quatre's jaguar (not the
animal the car) reserved for special occasions...such as this. Trowa and Wufei
sped away with Heero, Quatre was left to be dealt with Relena, and finally Duo
scrambled of to Heero's room, as he often got lost in Quatre's huge mansion,
this was the only familiar room and the one he could think of at the moment.
There was a bell downstairs meaning that Relena had arrived.
Duo was left stranded in Heero's room.
�Since Relena�s gonna stay here for hours, I might as well check my mails�. He
wondered eyeing Heero�s laptop.
He went over to the laptop, and saw that it was currently searching for any
viruses. Anyway he decided to see what he kept in his documents...there was
nothing but hacked files, past mission records, information on Oz�s mobile
suits...and an article of the latest computer virus.
�Crap� Duo thought �Can�t a guy be a little more fun, but then again the Perfect
Soldier isn�t supposed to be any fun�
He signed in his account and you can very well guess what he would keep as his
user ID, that�s right, Shinigami_rocks�.
�Nothing new� He thought grimly, �Only a load of trash and ....hellooo what is
this...� he thought enthusiastically.
Before him he saw a mail that said �You are a winner of�, he knew that these
mails were useless and a hoax...but he decided to check it out anyway...
******
Finally when Relena left, everyone came back.
�You guys are a bunch of cowards....most of all I�m mad at Wufei...why didn't
you stick around...are you also afraid of Relena� Quatre said with anger. Not
normal of him.
�IAM NOT AFRIAD OF SOME WEAK LITTLE ONNA YOU DEMENTED LITTLE RUGRAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!�
Wufei blared
�I didn't stick around because I wanted to ride the Jag mfmfmfmffff� Wufei was
interrupted as everyone had clapped a hand on his mouth.
�Wufei you idiot� Heero said whispering �You know better that saying that car's
name anywhere in the universe with Duo around is dangerous.......�
But it was too late; sound of running could be heard as if there was a stampede.
�Were doomed... no actually the car's doomed�. Quatre said sadly.
Duo ran over Quatre and cried �YOU HAVE A JAG...!� He cried pinning the blond to
the floor. �I HEARD SOMEONE SAY JAG!�
�Must have been a mistake� Wufei said looking innocently on the ground.
�What do you mean by mistake?� Duo asked irritated.
�By mistake he means error, incorrect, fault blunder, gaffe, inaccuracy,
oversight, take your pick� Trowa said.
�Thank you mister encyclopedia, but mistake is a part of my vocabulary� Duo
replied sarcastically.
�Well does your vocabulary have the word idiot in it, because you�re a big one�
Wufei said mocking Duo. Quatre whacked Wufei in the head with a dictionary.
�DOES YOUR VOCAB HAVE THE WORD SHUT UP IN IT?� Quatre shouted �It�s nearly
twelve a.m� get some sleep, if that�s in your vocabulary...�
**********
The next morning
Heero's room
�What the�, Heero growled, �What do you mean by file not found,� he said looking
at the screen, �UGH! OMAE O KOROSU� He said out loud to the laptop, �Darn
computer it was working perfectly yesterday....unless....� His eyes widened.
Duo's room
In his room Duo was sleeping peacefully and was at the very corner of the bed.
Suddenly an ear piercing scream, emanated from Heero's room
�DDDDDDDDDUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO"
Duo's ear perked up and his eyes opened "Uh-oh...need to hide" He thought as
footsteps of more of a monster grew near. He bolted inside the bathroom...
�Okay what did I do this time� he thought with panic, �whose stuff had I messed
with last night, Heero's laptop. Oh come on, I only opened a mail that�s all�
Thinking hard he remembered that article whose first three lines he had read,
that latest virus could be transferred through e-mails.
�Heero�s gonna kill me� He said. Outside that bathroom�
�That stupid moron�, Heero said with fire in his eyes (literally), �All my
important documents�damn...I�ll have to delete everything from the hard-disk
everything�.�
******
After 45 minutes
Duo peeped in his room to see if Heero had left.
�All clear�, he thought, as he came out Heero jumped and punched Duo in the
mouth. This triggered Duo�s defense system, causing him to punch him also. War
was inevitable.
*****
�I think we should go and see what�s happening� Trowa said casually playing
poker with Wufei.
�I�ll say, there�s no telling what they two might do to each other, probably rip
each other apart� Wufei said with amusement.
Quatre flinched �Well we have to at least save Duo?�
Wufei replied disappointed �Awww do we have to�.it would be nice to get rid of
that baka��
�Why do you hate him so much?� Quatre said defending his fellow pilot.
Wufei said rather irritated �I don�t hate him I just despise him�anyway that�s
personal business�
Quatre shrugged following Trowa and Wufei (who didn�t want to miss the action)
upstairs to that sacred room of screams and shouts. When they opened the door
*finally* they saw Duo on the floor and Heero kicking him.
Wufei started cheering �Finish him off Heero�.
Heero, distracted looked up, and Duo punched him hard in the face
�D**n you Wufei� Heero cried holding his bleeding nose.
Quatre now really irritated �Alright break it up you two! And Heero mind your
language�
Trowa helped Duo up and Quatre was holding Heero who was trying to get to Wufei
for distracting them. Status of the God of death and Perfect Soldier was�.not
good actually.
�Who started this?� Quatre asked.
Heero and Duo simultaneously pointing at each other, �He startef it�
�I dif not you idiof� Heero said stunned
Duo happily cried �Ha ha ha ha, you speafk fwunny�
Quatre really irritated �So do you, you punched each other in the mouth and now
it�s a trip to the dentist�
�Dwenstist?� Duo asked confused.
Quatre replied �Yes Duo Dwentist, uh I mean dentist�
*******
The Dentist
It was a scream festival going on. They reached the dental clinic which was
packed with screaming parents yelling and holding their screaming kids. The
receptionist was also screaming to tell the others to stop screaming. Duo and
Heero also wanted to scream out loud �IT�S YOUR FAULT�
When a little order was more or less restored, she told the three teens that the
doctor will see them in a moment. They settled down on old seats and looked over
to the magazines which were really out of date. Duo saw a book of ABC�s and
started reading that as nothing as was good.
�Humph� Duo thought, �D should be for Deathscythe�. The receptionist came out
and said �Dr. Khushrenada will see you now�
Heero and Duo looked at Quatre with wide eyes.
Quatre just shrugged and said �Dr. Khushrenada is a good dentist, he�s been mine
for a while now and Heero no guns allowed� He pointed out making Heero growl and
put his gun back into his belt.
�But, Tweize is dwead, Wufei killed him� Duo protested.
�It�s not Trieze Duo� Quatre remarked.
�Thwen I�m not leffing any relative of Tweize see me� Duo said crossing his arms
and stood glued to the spot. Heero grabbed his arm and said �You know Dwuo; this
wouldn�t haf haffened if you had lef my laptof alone�
A tall man with brownish hair smiling down at them (yes down, remember he was
taller than the G-boys). This man looked the exact copy of Trieze.
�Did Tweize make clones of himself� Duo asked as they entered the office Heero
behind Quatre who went over to shake his hand.
�I don�f know� Heero said his hand touching his gun which was tucked inside his
belt under his sweatshirt. But knowing Treize, it was a pretty good suggestion.
�Hello Quatre, here for a checkup� Trieze or someone like him said.
�No doc, it�s my friends� He said pointing back at Heero and Duo� �wait a
second�where was Duo? Duo was trying his best to sneak out the door when he
caught them staring at him, he turned around and walked sheepishly back to stand
beside Quatre and Heero. Dr Khushrenada smiled at him and proceeded to see their
lovely broken teeth.
�Well, well we have a serious case here� Dr. Khushrenada said looking at Quatre
with a confused look.
�They had a major fight� Quatre said smiling.
�Well im afraid boys you�re going to get braces.
Duo confused asked �bwaces??�
Heero glanced at Quatre who had an amused expression on his face. Somehow he
sensed that this was not going to be good
15 minutes later
Duo just came back with a red and horrified face.
Heero alarmed said �Is it thwat bawd?�
Duo �It�s horrible the pain is horrible but I did get this complementary candy
for good behavior.
Heero �Gwood behavior???� he asked, and then he burst into laughter falling of
the chair.
********
On the way home
Duo and Heero had finally got their braces on. Duo stuck his head out of the
window of the passenger seat when he saw his reflection. He opened his mouth and
saw what the braces looked like, his eyes widened, suddenly
�AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG�
The driver skidded, Heero, who on the verge of falling asleep, started grinning
like a maniac. He had already seen what the braces were like; he knew he looked
like a nerd wearing them, but it was perfect to get rid of Relena. However this
was one big blow for Duo�s ego, with some luck his head will deflate a bit this
time then.
�WAHHH!! I look like a NERD, Wuffy and Trowa will laugh at me� Duo wailed.
(A/N: I know I�m making him sound like a selfish egoistic person, but this is a
fanfiction, so it is all made up, so don�t flame me)
Heero amused said �Oh! No Duo�, he said sarcastically, �What will Hilde think?
Is this the end of the happy couple!� unable to control himself, Heero broke
into a maniacal laughter, while poor Duo whimpered.
*******
Duo was dreading to get inside the house, Heero got in smiling like a kid who�s
received a Gundam for a birthday present. Duo got in sulking and went inside the
bathroom.
Dinner time
�Quatre are you sure you took them to the dentist?� said Wufei, who was annoying
Quatre.
Quatre sighed �For the 100th time yes, why do you keep asking?�
Trowa replied �Because Heero�s been acting like Duo and Duo like Heero. You sure
you didn�t go to a mad scientist and changed their personalities, and by
scientist I mean Dr.J
Quatre shouted �NO, they got braces that�s all�
Wufei and Trowa choked on their food.
Trowa surprised �They got braces?!�
Wufei also amazed �No wonder why Heero was grinning like a maniac�
Trowa replied with sympathy �And Duo serious, glum�
Quatre shocked at the dumbness of the two said �Why! Didn�t they show and when
they talked?�
�Are you from this planet creature, Heero went meddling with his laptop and Duo
went into the bathroom as was never to be heard of again. They never did talk�
Wufei said knocking Quatre head with his knuckles. Just then, sounds of a grumpy
person could be heard from the stairs.
�Oooo!! Duo what big braces you have, why don�t you go and visit Hilde� Heero
said bugging Duo
Duo irritated said �Shut your trap you�you� self destructing loser? Aren�t you
gonna visit your girl, Relena?�
Heero said casually �Oh she�ll come here and wait till she sees my braces�
�Aren�t you afraid you�ll lose your future wife� Duo said amazed and was in
hopes of annoying Heero for a change.
�Duo you forgot I despise her, and what the heck! I wanna get rid her anyway.
Mwahahahahahah� Heero said laughing yet again at his brilliance.
Duo, with hatred in his eyes shouted �OMAE O KOROSU�
Downstairs
Trowa shocked at the conversation between the two said �Are you sure they didn�t
switch personalities Quatre?�
Wufei thinking in his scholar-istic way said �I think they switched half their
brains, Duo; having already a rotted half brain, got into Heero�s head and
Heero�s half polished sensible brain got into Duo�s rotten head. Ahh that�s a
sensible theory by my sensible head�
Quatre now getting a seriously sensible headache �Okay enough with the sensible
talk. We have to live this horror for a week, and when I say we I Of course mean
you two, if you abandon me here you�ll have to live on the street until we get
another mission, which won�t be until another lifetime as peace now prevails
throughout the Earth-sphere�
Wufei cried �Are you crazy winner�Of course I�ll stay here...I�m gonna make a
movie of those Brained switched guys. I don�t wanna forget it�.
At that moment Duo and Heero came in. Heero was wearing one of those Duo like
grins, and Duo was wearing a serious Heero Yuy look. They looked very weird, and
it was getting scary as Heero wouldn�t stop showing his braces. He actually
looked proud of them.
�Duo why aren�t you smiling? Is this a start to get sensible? Are you going to
get educated?� Wufei sarcastically said and was also mocking Duo.
�Wufei I am�� Duo started to reply in a dangerous tone but was interrupted by
Wufei who cried
�HE SAID MY PROPER NAME! BY GOLLY HE IS GOING TO GET SENSIBLE!!!!!!!!!�
Duo sarcastically and unenthusiastically said �Yay! Let�s all get drunk even
Quatre� closing his eyes he shouted out loud into Wufei's ear �WUFEI IF YOU
DON�T SHUT YOUR TRAP, YOUR GONNA DIE A VERY HORRIBLE DEATH BY THE GOD OF DEATH
HIMSELF!! And I�ll see you in hell; do send us a post card when you get there�
he ended with a note of sarcasm in his voice.
�Well at least the God of death part about himself was normal, and I�m tired of
wearing these stupid things� Heero said, somewhat sober.
Duo started to wail �And can�t eat with these things, it hurts�
Trowa sighed �Another sign that he�s normal Wufei�.
�I should never keep my expectations high, especially when it concerns about Duo
being sane�. Wufei said rather disappointed.
�I just CAN�T wait to see Relena� Heero said happily like a little girl.
*Sweat drops, big ones*
Duo cried �See that Wufei, now that�s abnormal. Heero is not normal, he never
was�.
�That is� rather very unusual� said Trowa shocked
Wufei said �Well you�re in luck she�s coming here with Zechs. He wanted to visit
us�.
Everyone looked at Quatre who shouted �I DIDN�T CALL THAT BITC...uhhhhhhh�I MEAN
WITCH�,
Duo snickered, Heero amazed along with Trowa. Quatre had been badly influenced
by the others who kept cursing one thing or another if not people.
�Ahh the injustice of telling the truth, i called 'Demon girl' and her brother
so that Zechs and i could make fun of Duo's braces�� Wufei confessed.
�Wufei you are very cruel� Duo calmly said.
�Thank you for the kind comment weakling� Wufei sarcastically replied.
Quatre yawned �Okay guys break it up let�s get some shut eye. And Duo for the
sake of argument those braces won�t bother you in sleep�
Wufei grinned �Hey weakling, Hilde�s also coming�
Duo wailed �WAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!! WUFEI HOW COULD YOU�
Wufei grinned �Finally my chance to seek revenge on the baka. Hilde�s gonna dump
Duo� (He sang)
Duo sniffed �Wufei let�s make it more challenging if Hilde doesn�t dump me
you�ll clean my room for a month�.
Wufei thought for a second �And if she does you�ll have to�to�hmm what can you
do?�
Duo replied �I�ll not eat for a month�.
Wufei without thinking said �Done weakling, at last their will be food in the
house.�
Duo warned him �And if I win and you run away you�ll be named the dishonorable
coward�.
Wufei again said �Done weakling�
The next morning
�Rise and shine sleeping braces� Heero said, jumping on Duo�s bed and as
expected and he fell on his ass.
Duo sat up �Hey only I�m authorized to jump on beds. Not you. And why are you so
happy in the morning your never were the morning type�.
Heero said �Forgot something, Relena, Zech�s and Hilde are coming today at 10:00
am�.
�Oh man! Getting braces was bad enough but showing them to Hilde even worse!! .
Why did you invite Relena Anyway?� Duo whimpered clutching his head.
Heero grinned �Well you gave me the idea, looking like a nerd is not so bad,
seeing my braces she�s gonna run off right, and Wufei who heard my plans thought
it would be fun to call Hilde so that she'll run off too� he said smiling
showing his shiny braces.
Duo cried �I really, really hate you guys, and what did you do, polish your
braces�
Heero smiled �Yes I did polish them, now get dressed you lazy bum �.
Duo shouted �HEY THAT�S MY LINE�
*******
10:00 Am
Relena came in followed by Zechs and Hilde �Hey guys� they said.
�Hi Relena� The G-boys minus Heero and Duo said together.
�Not running off today are we� Relena grinned at the former pilots lined up in
the kitchen.
�How did you know about that woman?� Wufei snapped.
�Whenever I come I see a black jag make its way out of here� Relena said
grinning again.
Duo (from the stairs) �YOU HAVE A JAG AND YOU NEVER TOLD ME�.
�LOOK WHAT YOU DID NOW WOMAN; YOU EXPOSED THE SECRET OF THE JAG" Wufei said
alarmed.
�Awww Gee Wufei is that all you�ve got in your vocabulary. You should take
English classes�.Hilde said irritated
Relena looked around and asked �Where�s Heero?�
Trowa said �Heero�s coming and dragging Duo along with him�.
�Why?� Hilde said surprised.
Trowa smiled a little �He doesn�t want to show you his braces; it�s all we�ve
been hearing for the past few days. They�ve been acting weird�
Hilde now really surprised �How come and why doesn�t he wanna show his braces?�
Quatre �He�s scared that you might dump him. And they act like as if they had
switched personalities, Heero�s been grinning and smiling a lot and Duo has been
dead serious. And one more thing Hilde what�s that on your teeth�
Hilde grinned happily showing the shiny objects on her teeth, and said �Braces�
"WHAT!???!!" Everyone cried in unisoin.
Just then Duo and Heero walked in. Heero was smiling and grinning in a way that
he looked very disgusting and not to mention nerdish.
Relena at seeing the sight of Heero said �Uhh! I have an important meeting so
see you guys later�. (She literally dashed out of there)
Zechs amazed said �Heero how did you do that? No one has ever disgusted my
sister that much to make her run out�.
�I owe it all to the braces. And Hilde what�s that on your teeth� Heero said.
Hilde happily said �Braces"
�Did you say braces� Duo said as he stood frozen to the spot.
�Yup� Hilde said.
�How did it happen?�
�I fell down the stairs, forgot to tie my laces� Hilde chuckled
�YESSSSSSSS� Duo happily cried as he hugged Hilde tightly whose eyes were nearly
buldging out.
Trowa commented �Ladies and gentlemen introducing the Brace couple�.
Wufei stared in horror at the horror that awaited him. �Still� he thought �I
can�t be called a dishonorable coward that would be a big dishonor to me�,
suddenly he shouted, �LIVE IS A BIG INJUSTICE in other words life sucks�
Duo replied �That�s the American way, curse life�
One week later
Duo said on and on �Rearview Mirror, Rearview Mirror on that car�s� thingy.
Who�s the prettiest Gundam pilot of all?�
Heero, who had now returned to his normal self, said �Me, now shut up before I
cripple you�.
Duo said �Awww you�re just angry because Wufei didn�t win the bet�.
�Well why shouldn�t I be angry, for the first time there would be some food left
in the mansion� Heero replied angrily
�I thought you weren�t programmed to eat� Duo said surprised.
"Well i do eat, and now you know" Heero grunted.
�I wonder if Wufei has cleaned my room yet� Duo said looking out the window.
�Wufei and Trowa left for a mission, so it�s you who have to clean it, and by
the way Wufei�s taking a vacation for a month� Quatre said looking at Duo in the
front seat who was taking time to absord what he had just heard. When it had
sunk into his head and through the thick braid, Duo clenched his teeth and his
eyebrow started twutching.
�WHAT!!! THIS IS INJUSTICE, THE DISHONORABLE COWARD� Duo completely outraged
cried
*******
On board the plane Trowa asked Wufei �Didn�t you have a bet with Duo to clean
his room?�
Wufei looked a little nauseated suddenly �Well I was crazy enough to agree at
first and all my plans were ruined thanks to that onna,� he grumbled, �but when
I saw Duo�s room, well, let's just say I�ve seen junkyards more cleaner than
that, you get the point�
Trowa chuckled �I certainly do. And wise choice�
"Thanks" Wufei said.
The end
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