Oh, Verdomme!!! ------- The lull is over. It hurts - so cold - voices - shrieking in my head -------- The walls keep changing - ice - no - it's like a hall of mirrors - running with blood, filth. Vision - but not vision as I've always known. The feel isn't the same - it's all WRONG! I've got to get out of here. This is a trap. I can't stay. Oh, God!!!! I SEE----- I see a monster ---- & it's me----- I know it's me.
I'm laid out - on a slab - chains - clamps - spikes - can't move - lumps of flesh strewn across the floor - bits and pieces of me. Arms - stumps - legs - stumps - splayed wide - high - clamped open - hips disjointed. I see myself in the ceiling - DON'T LOOK!!! One eye - no face - rotting caverns - everything hacked - gouged - burned - melted.
Oh God - 666 carved into me - the sign of the Beast burned into my neck. I've been branded. I'm an abomination!. I've been --------- NO! I am a man - whatever is left of me. I am a man. I'm human!
Keep writing!!!! Look down - look through the vision. Remember your training. The pen is your reality--- FEEL IT!!!! - It is your anchor. The pen is held by a hand - by my left hand. My hand is REAL. Write!!!! Anything - just write. Focus the mind on the pen - on the action. WRITE!!!
NO!!! I can't scream - tongue gone - teeth gone - mouth empty - jaw mangled - gaping hole - ever open. Pain! Oh, God.
Is this real? No! The pen is real! Will it be real? It must be delirium? Is it madness? I smell the stench of human rot, and it's me. Maggots - I hear them gnawing - inside me - eating, eating, eating------- NO!!!!
Laughter - a voice - deep, demonic! Focus on the PEN - on the words - think of the paper & those stupid flowers. Think of the colours --- blue, green, orange, pink. That's reality. Those silly colours --- Easter colours - Resurrection colours - bunny rabbits - eggs - flowers!
NO! That's fantasy - that's your dreamworld, Precept - a phantom memory of a hand that no longer exists. Behold! The truth! LOOK UP! What you see above you exists - a vile, debauched beast - YOU, Precept! You're mine now, my gelded concubine - my living corpse, food for worms, to love as I chose for all eternity. Feel your heaven, my dear, butchered Abelard, mijn gratenkut. Feel your Heloise swell inside you, entwine herself around your heart - grow within your makeshift womb. When I was planted here - did you enjoy that? Did your body scream and thrash in rapture - or was that agony? Did I see lust burn brightly in your eye? Remember it well, mia schiava. It will be yours again and again and again.
Do you feel my surgeons at work? Maybe carpenters is more apt. Do you feel the worms remodeling - I prefer the minimalist look - only the bare necessities with a proper presentation. Do you feel them hacking a new portal - a tunnel to the only Light you'll ever know, my Light, my flames of Hell. It will be a tiny, little cunt gouged out to satisfy my immensity.
Oh, God! The laughter - the sounds! Screams! I can't see my hand any more. Where's my pen? I must keep writing. So hot! I blister inside. I feel the worms. NO!! My hand is real. It holds a pen. Flowers. It is my journal. I am Derek Rayne, Legacy Precept. I am still alive. I am in San Francisco on Mason St. My friends are Nick, Alex, Rahel, Chrle, Bmbi, X--- btny, Wilm. Inrd is mijnzuster. God in his hven. I am in Hotl San Migl---- WRITE !!!
You are in Room 666. This room - my room, my Caliban. The sepulchres were never my way into to the world - merely gambit overlaying diversion - my foolish, demon-spawned precept. You, with your puny, arrogant mind, your vain attempts at righteousness, you thought to checkmate ME?!!!! You, whom I begot, thought to oppose ME! It was always you, "the Anointed One," the trump card - my puppet - since the dawn of time - Michael's own champion born of Lucifer's seed - ever destined to be Satan's incestuous whore - the branded cow that will drop the Golden Calf to end the world. What delicious revenge. How's that for stand-up comedy? Maybe "ass-up" is more the word, my sweet.
Do you feel me, bitch? I'm growing now. Feel me, my brood mare? - and after - I'll plow you harder than a boar rides a sow - you'll be the incubator - my hive, my hatchery. All those whom you love overwhelmed, fucked, & consumed by your own spawn. YOU are the portal, the real portal, that will bring all the demons of Hell into this world.
No respite - no sleep! You'll sleep when you're dead! Remember? That's the Eternal Jokester's joke - You're alive! - no sleep, ever again - no oblivion. Only the eternal ecstacy of ME!
God hulp me! Alstublieft! Please help! Eli, Eli, lama sabacthani.
Call to Him, Signorina Arusa! What makes you think He'll hear you now, my mute monster? When did He ever hear you? Did you humble yourself before Him? I think not - like father, like son - cast down, abandoned for daring to stand before Him - for taking up his offer of free will. He knows you for what you are - my haughty, bastard whelp, yet you call to HIM!!!!
Feel the wrath of a father - this will be your eternal penance before ME!!!--- mijn kettingzeug - my 'chained sow' - FEEL IT!!! I will ram you, explode within you. Your mind will scream for mercy, but you'll be a helpless, gurgling lump of rot. So sweet a thought, Precept - mine to fuck into infinity - my prick will split what's left of your puny body. Dream of it! My hard-on lasts an eternity - I am insatiable - I will fuck you till your every hole is agony, and then come back for more, and still more. My seed - my excrement - will fill you - every orifice will be mine. Feel my cock jammed down your throat and up your ass. You are mine - Precept Sow - forever. And for every one of those million rutting copulations, you are doomed to a bitch's labor a million times over - and nothing to do but endure, and pray to Him who has abandoned you like the putrified sack of shit you are.
Do you feel your tits - engorged - heavy with my pustulant nectar? Do they throb like two great boils? Shhhhh!!! Lie still - feel their suffocating weight? Feel them stretching as they fill beyond anything you dreamed possible? Shhhh! Don't breath, don't pant - any bitch will tell you, it just gives tits an agonizing life of their own. Oh!!!! I'll squeeze them and pump them and knead them until you pray that I burst them. Shhh!!!! LOOK UP - in the mirror - see how they flop with every movement - feel their swelling pain as they drag to the side - Shhhh!!!! See your belly grow with my magnificence - and after me all of the hoards of Hell. Suckle my children well, Precept Sow - starving mouths - razor teeth - impatient, pumping claws - and you can't even scream. Love them well, my Madonna, or I'll put those tits in a vise for a thousand years, even as I hump you to Hell & back.
Oh, God, I can't breathe - crushing, liquid stones - pulsating pain - enormous bags of abhorrence - the stench. More laughter - roaring - Focus on the pen! I AM Derek Rayne. I AM alive. I AM free. I ate bad fish. I have a fever - infected burn. That is what ths is - delerioum - dementia. Focus on the words on the pappper!!
If you pleasure me, Madam Monstrosity, perhaps in a millennium or two I'll grant absolution & free you from your delivery table. Let that dream sustain you - a floundering, bloated, bleating monster that only hungry children will love. LOOK UP! See it heave itself across the floor to escape their rutting affections. See it drag its tits through its own crap? Feel it's ravenous hunger? LOOK! See it suck up its own piss. It thirsts for my spilled cum, craves its own putrid afterbirth. Look into its eye - see it plead to suck my cock. Remember the name Derek Rayne! Cling to it. Remember his arrogance. I make him a gift of that eye and these mirrors. I'll make sure he lives somewhere within you, Madam Monstrosity. No oblivion for him. I'll sustain him, so he can enjoy every sublime second. I grant him a boon - his most cherished possession - clarity of mind and thought - so that he can know what he is - the cunt & tits that will end the worrld - nothing more! - that proud brain reduced to a useless appendage that will know nothing but defeat and utter degradation. He'll pray for insanity. And I make him a gift of his dead worm - or what's left of it. Perhaps, my brides shall fondle what's left of his manhood - give it a little wiggle for old time's sake.
Oh, God! This can't be real. It's food poisoning & fever. It's demonic assault. I reject thee vile demon! Begone! Get thee behind me! Jesus, please, make it stop. It is growing - I feel it. It IS growing.
Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned - I repent and am heartily sorry if I have offended Thee - I humble myself before Thee - I will fear no evil - Hail, Mary - pray for us now --- pray for the hour of our death! Oh God! Where's the key? I have to get out. I feel it growing inside me. Blood - on my hands - on my------ I will fear no evil - I will fear no evil - Thou art with me!!!! ------ for every darkness there is light, for every evil good ----- and this too shall pass.
Reject ME!!!! Never!!!! No mere demon am I!!!! Your fate since the dawn of time, Precept Sow!!!! The truth is darkness ----- there is no light. Two sides of the same coin - Yield! Join me, now! Of your own will - become the vessel of the Anti-Christ - taste the power - fulfill the destiny forr which you were born - to sit at MY feet and rule in the name of the Beast.
No ----- it will pass! You bastard, GET OUT OF MY MIND! There is good. There is Light. God is in His Heaven. The
Darkness shall not win. Please, glorious Michael, Guardian of Souls, slay me
now--- Let me die yours --- your soldier for eternity. Inger! My Light! The burden is
yours, my Jeanne d'Arc! Pray! PRAY FOR ME!!!
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