[The Engagement] [The Wedding] [Notary's reading] [The Vows and Breaking of the Glass]
[Eban's Speech] [Michael's Speech] [Miguel Angel's Music] [Photos]

The Wedding
December 27, 2002

Eban and Mercedes had planned to have their wedding ceremony on a hillside at the beautiful Parque de la Vida in Armenia, with the sunset behind them reflecting on the Andes mountain peaks. Due to a bureaucratic complication, the notary who was to perform the service was not available until 6:30 p.m.; after sunset. Instead, they decided to hold the service at the reception hall, which had been booked for the post-wedding festivities. This was initially a disappointment, but in the end served to make the whole occasion an intimate, inclusive and fluent one, blending all the different phases of the service, meal and festivities together into one joyous event in which all present could participate fully.

As Sarah, Eban, Michael and I entered the reception hall we were greeted by a distinguished gentleman and three charming waiters who ushered us to the head table. The adjoining guest rooms were festively but tastefully decorated - round tables decked with white embroidered tablecloths, white-draped chairs, yellow and white floral centrepieces; every table set with tall white candles and sparkling dinnerware. In the adjoining room we could see three gorgeous wedding cakes, exquisitely decorated with delicate flowers to match the rest of the décor. There was also a special table were Eban and Mercedes were to sit opposite the notary as they said their vows. The doors were open to the street, as they so often are on warm Colombian evenings. Gradually friends and family began to drift in. There were no assigned seats or place cards; people just found each other and sat together comfortably, as they chose. We were greeted with warm hugs and kisses of recognition and welcome by Mercedes's aunts, uncles, cousins, university friends and teaching colleagues from Gimnasio Ingles. Each family seemed to contain several adorable young girls. We had already met most of the invited guests, either at Mercedes's house on December 24th, or on the evening before the wedding when Eban had arranged a traditional serenata for Mercedes. The observance of this lovely tradition came as a surprise to Mercedes, who hadn't expected Eban to arrange it, as a non-Colombian. The music was provided for by Eban's friend and colleague Miguel Angel, a beautiful singer and guitarist, who serenaded Mercedes (and assembled friends and guests) with a programme of love songs. The holiday season had also provided occasion for much partying and dancing in the days leading up to the wedding, so we didn't feel like strangers at all by the time the wedding day arrived.

Finally, Mercedes's parents Teresa and Herney, sister Milena, niece baby Sofia, and grandmother Efigenia arrived, followed by the bride and her daughter Camila. Mercedes, of course was stunning in her white dress, her black hair coiled up with tiny white flowers arranged in it. She wore a pearl necklace, which was her wedding gift from Grandma Rosalie, and pearl earrings from myself, which had been a gift from Great-Grandma Bessie (Michael's grandmother) years ago. Camila was a vision in a gorgeous crème-coloured dress down to her ankles and flowers matching her mother's in her hair. Mercedes, Eban and Camila then took seats at the table facing the notary for the ceremony.

The service itself began rather formally with the notary proceeding through various official passages apparently prescribed by Colombian law, including passport numbers! Somewhat awkwardly, Eban's best man, Orlando, served as translator from the Spanish to English for the benefit of the "foreign" bridegroom and his family. This had been a requirement of the notary. Orlando was a little overwhelmed by the task at times, which served as comic relief for the somewhat officious and lengthy address of the notary. The notary redeemed himself toward the end, however, as he concluded the service with some very personal and thoughtful words to the young couple. Thus his part of the service ended gracefully and sensitively, bridging the gap from a non-religious service to a kindly off-the-cuff sermon. Eban and Mercedes then spoke their own personally composed vows in English and Spanish, exchanged rings handed to them by Camila on a handmade white satin cushion, and became husband and wife. Finally, Eban broke a wine glass wrapped in his grandfather's handkerchief, in observance of the Jewish tradition at weddings.

Next came the rounds of formal photographs - a ritual which went on for almost an hour. The bride and groom cut the cakes, which were served before the meal, with glasses of champagne. Meanwhile, various members of the family and friends posed together for photos with Mercedes and Eban.

There were quite a few tears, especially from the fathers. Michael delivered a short and beautiful speech, which he had prepared in Spanish with the help of one of our colleagues in the orchestra. This served to melt any remaining sense of distance or foreignness between the two families. We couldn't have felt closer or more united at this moment, despite the differences in language, culture and background.

As we sat down to dinner, we were again serenaded by Miguel Angel, who sang hauntingly and powerfully, accompanying himself on the guitar. He has a rich warm voice and sings with a passion and strength that is unforgettable. At the conclusion of the meal, a delicious one by the way, there was yet one more wonderful surprise. One of Mercedes's university friends had arranged a performance of tango and mambo dancing by her sister and partner, a professional dance team. Michael, Sarah and I were seated in the front of the circle to get the best view, along with Mercedes's parents. To see an authentic performance of the tango, which we all love so much, really up close in front of our eyes, was thrilling and exciting. After they finished, the inevitable for any Colombian celebration began; chairs were cleared and the dancing (and drinking) began in earnest. Michael, Sarah and I were treated to expert dance instruction on this trip, including some very sexy partners for all of us! But for me, my favourite partner throughout the ten days in Armenia still has to have been Herney, Mercedes's father. Although portly, he dances with feather-light feet and always with a slight smile lighting up his round face. Even after a good deal of aguardiente, the anise-flavoured drink we were plied with at every party, he was a debonair and patient partner.

I think it is safe to say that for all concerned, the wedding was as beautiful, joyous and romantic as any wedding could be; the young couple looked happy and radiant, the families enjoyed each other and shared mutual emotions that are universal. Thank you Eban and Mercedes for the opportunity to be a part of this new venture of shared cultures. We wish you all the best that a good partnership can bring.

- Dina Namer