A while ago I went out on a date with a woman (OK stop that�s not intended to be the shocking part). Well, for all intensive purposes it was a �blind date�, although I knew of her through a friend and had interacted with her briefly a few times before. To me she seemed to be a relatively �normal� girl (as far as anyone can fit into a generalization that in fact does not exist). I suppose I should say relatively mainstream, not someone who would make you think �hmm well there�s something new.� That being said she was attractive and nice and I thought we would have a great time. Well I thought of several places to eat, and vainly holding the opinion that I have excellent taste in restaurants, I never questioned that she might hold disdain for my suggestions, at least not for all of them. I was wrong, and certainly not for the last time this evening. It turns out she�s a vegan, which, for those of you who don�t know, means someone who eats no animal product of any kind�no meat, no dairy, no eggs etc. Now I am certainly not attacking the dietary choices of any individual or group of individuals, but you try to pick a nice restaurant based on those limitations! From what I hear most vegans by nature are a fairly tolerant lot though. That is, they can eat anywhere as long as they find something on the menu that will meet their requirements, unfortunately this woman made it known to me the day of the date that she can�t stand the sight of cooked meat and dairy products. To her watching the consumption of such food is tantamount to witnessing murder. Now I�m sure many of you are saying right now �Hey there�s a warning sign that you all might not be compatible�, and of course I thought that myself, but she laughed as she said this so I figured she was just joking, plus I though it would be flaky to back out on a date only a few hours before. Of course I asked her to recommend a place to eat, but she refused, so after talking to her she agreed that it would be possible for her to eat at the Cheesecake factory (which cracked me up considering the dairy products) as long as we ate out doors on the balcony. So that�s what we did.
I have to say the Cheesecake Factory is a nice place here, especially outside on a warm spring night overlooking some spectacular fountains, so I was comfortable. She on the other hand, seemed barely able to tolerate the place. I asked her if she wanted to go somewhere else but she said it was Okay. So before we order I start talking to her, we were getting along fairly well for the most part, and somehow we got to talking about dreams. Well, I told her about this really bizarre dream that I�ve had before that I just think is hysterical and afterwards I look to see that she has leaned forward in concentration and she frowns and sits back saying, �hmm It sounds as if you were astrally projecting.� Of course I laugh and say, �oh THAT�s what it was?� and she states, �Oh yes, I do it all the time, in my dreams I have traveled all around the world in a real way.� To which I say �hmmmmm� and start looking for the waiter. She then starts telling me about her fascination and dedication to Wiccan, and all about her altar at home where she casts spells. Now, I say this not to put any negative light on wiccan, or to put forth this woman as a representation of that which some people hold as a religion, but I feel as I did at that time, that this was yet another clear example of why this date was not gonna go well lol. At this point my general attitude is to at least have fun on this date even though I know already that I may never see this woman again in my life and that would be JUST fine. So I start to joke around, really benignly I thought. I wasn�t meaning to be disrespectful to her religion. I asked her what kind of spells she cast and what she liked about it, and after talking to her I found out that she really had no earthly idea of the pagan histories and roots of her particular faith, but because I felt it would be rude to point this out, so I simply asked if she was ever afraid of a house falling on her? (in a joking way of course) Well this didn�t go over so well. She laid into me about the persecution �her kind� have received throughout history and all that. I still had a difficult time believing she was serious. Finally the waiter came to break up that conversation (thank god). After ordering her salad with a longer set of special instructions than my VCR came with, the waiter turned to me. I flatly told him that I was in fact a fruitarian, and could only eat what had fallen from the tree and was hence DEAD already, not viciously ripped from the womb of mother earth to be wantonly and needlessly consumed by voracious, gluttons. I looked up at my �date� saying �you carrot murderer� The waiter burst out laughing, and Ann Heche on the otherside of the table scowled in an amusing mix of horror and anger. The waiter asked what I really wanted, to which I replied, �KC Strip steak, rare...I want it bleeding all over the plate�I looked up to see her almost gag. After the waiter left I enjoyed the rest of the evening�s relative silence immensely. <shrug> at least I had fun! |