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| Men in groups | ||||||||
| Men's groups have become increasingly popular over the past two decades as men from all walks of life have begun to recognize their need to connect with other men.� Promise Keepers gatherings demonstrate that many American men feel the need to address personal concerns about being a husband or a father, or feeling isolated or too angry, in a larger social context.� In communities around the country men have also formed groups at churches, synagogues, and mosques; they have gone to men's weekend retreats with Robert Bly and others; they have joined men's therapy groups.�� This impulse to come together with other men reflects important changes in men's relationship to themselves and to other men. | ||||||||
| The growing interest in men's groups of all kinds is a product of the significant social and economic changes our culture has undergone during the past generation.� The women's movement has changed social expectations of men's and women's roles.� Men are challenged by a generation of women seeking more egalitarian relationships at home and in the marketplace.� Men are being asked, and are asking themselves, to be more flexible, more communicative, and more caretaking than ever before.� Some of these roles carry with them contradictory demands, e.g., roles which may require aggressiveness in one situation and nurturance in another.� At the same time, many more boys are growing up as children of divorce.�� Raised by single mothers, these boys may have little or no intimate contact with an adult man.� In order to adapt to the increasingly complex contemporary demands men need help and support from one another to expand their images of themselves and learn and practice new skills.� Men's groups can provide an important resource for men interested in self development. | ||||||||
| Independent men's groups, like those formed around churches or which have come together on an ad hoc basis, offer their members a sense of belonging and an opportunity to share their life experiences and struggles with other men like themselves.� The stresses of being a breadwinner, the demands and frustrations of intimacy, the trials and tribulations of being a father and a son, are commonly discussed issues.� Many of these groups incorporate contemporary critiques of the male role.� They support men's wishes to let go of the "strong, silent and self-reliant" stereotypes that many strive to live up to.� By encouraging mutual self-disclosure these groups often provide men with a sense of connection and a feeling that they can reveal themselves and be accepted as a man, by other men.� These groups are usually initiated by an individual man or small group of men seeking to create an ongoing group.� Like the therapy groups described below, these groups are usually limited in size, meet regularly, but may or may not have a formal leader. | ||||||||
| Men's psychotherapy groups offer an additional dimension to those above.� These groups are organized and led by a trained group psychotherapist interested in men's issues.� Groups are often organized around needs for social and emotional support, or around particular issues such as fathering, being gay or trauma.� The therapist brings together a group of 6 to 8 men seeking to explore in depth their experiences of being men.� The groups usually encounter familiar male concerns about trusting other men, revealing the self, and anxiety over competition and shaming.� As the group develops, the therapist supports the members' exploration of their conflicts about depending� on one another (and other people), their need to grieve lost relationships with fathers, friends, and lovers, and their hopes and fears about measuring� up to their own and other people's standards of what kind of man they are to be.� More specialized groups bring together men who share a common experience, such as being traumatized.� In these groups there is often an enhanced sense of mutual identification and a feeling of safety and familiarity.�� This may lead to a deeper examination of the common issues. | ||||||||