Only in America can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance
Only in America are there handicap parking places in front of a skating rink
Only in America do people order double cheese burgers, a large fry and a diet coke
Only in America do banks leave both doors open and then chain the pens to the counters
Only in America do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and leave useless things and junk in boxes in the garage
Only in America do we use answering machines to screen calls and then have call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone we didn't want to talk to in the first place
Only in America do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight
Only in America do we use the word "politics" to describe the process so well: "Poli" in Latin meaning "many" and "tics" meaning "blood-sucking creatures"
