| Title: Comforted by the Innocent Author: Ginger Ninja Summary: Qui-Gon's thoughts are lost in recent events but one tiny little boy distracts him...if only for a little while... Time Frame: Pre-JA (By about 10 or 11 years I think) Archive: If I already gave you permission, take it. If I haven't drop me an e-mail. Disclaimer: The boys belong to Mr G. Lucas. Not me. I just like to use them for angst, mush and other types of fan fics! :) Author's note: This is a bit of an introduction to my entire series. Short, sort of angst but with a wee bit of mush in there too :) It's time I wrote something slightly less depressing methinks :D ***** He strode through the Temple with a speed that could not be matched by someone of lesser height nor probably even someone of matching or a greater length of legs. He moved with all the dignity and intent of someone who had a destination in mind but truthfully, Qui-Gon Jinn had no where to go. He was just walking. Walking as if such constant movement could cause the thoughts currently buzzing round his mind to sprout legs of their own and leave his already cluttered mind. He passed by the large cafeteria, a classroom, another classroom, a gym, a sparring room and yet none of these could offer enough appeal for him to stop his aimless, yet thoughtful, march. He marched into the Room of a Thousand Fountains without really noticing his unconsciously chosen path. He blinked hard as one particularly strong memory of Xanatos' betrayal shot through his mind's eye. He opened his eyes and found himself standing in front of a large pond. He took a moment to realise that a figure was slowly wading into the water that sparkled and danced in the bright afternoon sunlight. Tears caused by his memory caught the sunlight in his eyes blurred his vision and Qui-Gon thought he was gazing a teenage boy. He was struck by a sense of familiarity although he did not associate it with Xanatos and he did not know any other boys of that youthful age. Blinking hard again, Qui-Gon's vision cleared and instead of seeing a teenage boy wading out into the waters, he saw a small boy. Acting on instinct alone, devoid of any conscious thought, Qui-Gon rushed down to the waters edge and grabbed the child. Qui-Gon was holding on to the child for a moment, before finding himself pushed firmly away with an uncontrolled and powerful Force shove. The boy cried out slightly and stumbled further into the water, clearly not suspecting someone to stop him. Before Qui-Gon could get himself firmly on his feet, the little boy disappeared beneath the surface of the water as he stepped beyond his depth. Qui-Gon lurched forward and grabbed the struggling boy and hauled him up. The child coughed and gasped and within the space of a few seconds was sobbing. Qui-Gon held the wailing child out from him at arms length and winced at the piercing wails that erupted from the boy. A screaming, distraught child was definitely NOT what Qui-Gon needed at this particular moment. Qui-Gon wasn't used to small children and when he was being truthful to himself, he admitted that he felt slightly overwhelmed in the presence of a toddler due to his lack of knowledge about caring for them. Children made him uncomfortable and nervous. The child's pitiful wails was beginning to disturb the other Jedi in the gardens so with a heavy sigh, Qui-Gon reluctantly drew the dripping wet boy close. Stiffly and emotionlessly, Qui-Gon rocked the boy. But with no warmth or comfort being offered the boy didn't quiet down. Qui-Gon took a deep breath, released his tension and mild annoyance to the Force with the success he hadn't been able to achieve since Xanatos' actions on Telos, and sat down. Relaxing himself, Qui-Gon was able to offer the tiny, weeping boy in his arms comfort. Now that he was actually paying attention to the boy, Qui-Gon realised his sobs weren't just wordless wails. In fact the boy was howling "Mummy!" over and over. "I...want...my...m-m-mummy!" the boy's words were broken up with hiccups and sniffles. "Where'd m-my m-mummy g-go?" And then Qui-Gon understood. This little boy was a new initiate and had clearly only recently left his parents. In fact it was very obvious the boy was new to the Temple as he was still wearing his own clothes and not the uniform of an Initiate. The little boy wore a baggy bright yellow t-shirt and a pair of dungarees. He had a head full of dripping wet ginger hair and it was now plastered to his forehead. Qui-Gon estimated the toddler to be no older than two. Yet he was a two-year-old with impressive strength in the Force, especially if he was capable of keeping a Jedi Master away from him. "It's OK little one," Qui-Gon told the wet and forlorn looking toddler. The boy snuggled closer to Qui-Gon, seeking comfort. He was quite unaware of how he was soaking the Jedi Master with both his tears and his wet clothes. "I m-miss mummy," he whispered, calming down now. "I know you do," Qui-Gon said gently. "Why did s-she leave m-me? D-did I d-do something w-wrong?" Qui-Gon looked at the boy in surprise. "Of course you didn't do anything wrong little one!" he rushed to assure the boy. "She left you here because...because you're a very special little boy and you're mummy realised that she needed to bring you here." "B-but I don' wanna b-be here! I wanna b-be with mummy!" the boy was quickly becoming worked up again. Qui-Gon struggled to think of a way in which he could explain everything to the boy. "Child, your mother left you here because she knew we could care for you in a special way because you are very special. Even though she loves you very much, your mummy knew it was time for you to leave her and come here to stay with the Jedi. We'll take care of you just like she did, I promise. We take care of everyone here and make sure that they are all happy and that no one is ever left sad or alone." Qui-Gon ignored the nagging voice in the back of his mind that told him he wanted nothing more than to be left alone right now and be as far away from this miserable child as possible. He had other concerns, important concerns and... "B-but why are y-you sad? Y-you said no one w-would b-be sad here," the little boy interrupted Qui-Gon's annoying inner-voice. "Wha-?" Qui-Gon looked down at the boy and, for the first time, met his eyes. The boy's startling blue/green eyes held the innocence only young children could possess. He was completely oblivious to how his question had taken Qui-Gon by surprise. Quite calm now, the boy continued to speak. "You're very sad," the boy said, wide eyes never straying from Qui-Gon's. "You shouldn't be." "Why not?" Qui-Gon's voice had gone hoarse suddenly. "Um... 'cause you just said n-no one is sad here. Even if...even if I want my...my mummy..." the boy's voice was tearful but he held it back. He wrapped his arms around Qui-Gon and hugged him tightly. "If y-you make me happy, I-I can make you happy..." And despite all of Qui-Gon's reservations, despite his tendency to be uncomfortable around the very young, despite his wish to be left well alone by everyone in the Jedi Temple, he found himself hugging the little boy in his arms as tightly as he could without harming this truly amazing child. The comforter became the comforted although the boy was incapable at this age of knowing what he was unintentionally doing for a man who had been devastated in a way few knew or could understand. But maybe, just for now, for this one moment, Qui-Gon didn't need someone who knew his pain or understood his despair and anguish. Maybe all Qui-Gon needed at this moment was someone, no matter how young, who had no idea what he was experiencing. Maybe all Qui-Gon needed was some kind of physical contact with another living being who wasn't desperate to hear his story and offer endless advice. Perhaps all Qui-Gon needed was someone to show him that he still lived using the simplest of all methods: a hug. And for that moment, Qui-Gon held on to the child and relished in the comfort the small arms offered. The moment passed, and Qui-Gon withdrew himself from the hug, only to find that his young comforter had fallen asleep. Smiling and relieved that the child was no longer distraught, Qui-Gon stood up and began to make his way to the cr�che where this little guy was sure to be missed. *** Qui-Gon Jinn, stone cold Jedi Master, walked into the cr�che, a tiny bundle of soaking wet clothes and ginger hair snoozing in his arms and left a trail of gaping childminders behind him. He made his way to the office of the cr�che Master-who's name was Bemc. Knocking on the door, he stepped in to find a very frantic woman sitting by a com unit, her eyes fixated on it as if she was willing it to beep. Qui-Gon cleared his throat and managed to get the cr�che Master's attention. "Yes?" she asked, tearing her anxious gaze away from the com unit. "Can I help you?" "I believe this is yours," Qui-Gon said, indicating at the bundle in his arms. Bemc let out a soft cry of joy and rushed over to Qui-Gon. She looked into his arms and smiled and let out a breath in relief as she saw that this bundle was her missing child. "Oh there he is! He's only been here for a few hours but he's definitely the inquisitive and stubborn type. The instant he discovered that his mother had gone, he was determined to find her. How he got past all of us I don't know but he managed it!" Bemc took the slumbering boy out of Qui-Gon's arms. "There now Obi-Wan," she murmured. "Let's get you into a bed." She looked back up at Qui-Gon. "Thank you for finding him." She paused for a moment as she took note of Obi-Wan's soaking clothes. "The gardens I presume?" Qui-Gon nodded. "Yes he was about to drown himself in the pond. Why would he be looking for his mother in a pond?" "Oh I think that was just his curiosity and inquisitiveness getting the better of him," Bemc said with a laugh. "Funny child. Hmm...yes I think this one's going to do some amusing things in his time. And be the cause of many headaches and premature grey hairs for me!" Qui-Gon laughed, a real laugh that was full of mirth instead of bitterness. "Yes I'm sure he will." Qui-Gon gently rubbed his hand over little Obi-Wan's head gently. "Be sure to take care of him," he added quietly, almost speaking to himself as he was remembering how the child had helped him. "He's very special." Bemc looked at Qui-Gon, a strange look in her eye as she recognised the fleeting look of love that was on Qui-Gon's face as he regarded the boy. She caught a glimpse of the old Qui-Gon Jinn-the one who wasn't being torn apart inside by some unfathomable guilt and depression. "I know," she told Qui-Gon just as quietly. Any child who could bring back Qui-Gon had to be special. And without another word, Qui-Gon left the child in the competent arms of Bemc. For the first time, Qui-Gon had seen the other side of his despair. He was by no means past his anguish and sorrow and he wouldn't be for a long time but now he knew that he was still capable of love. And that meant more to him than anything. ***The End*** |
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