| Title: One Apprentice, One Pathway #1: Brewing (Part Two) Author: Ginger Ninja ***** You don't know what you've got till it's gone... ***** Kyrana walked along side her Master, Lena, as they returned to their apartment from the large Temple Gardens. Kyrana was telling her Master about what had happened between her and Obi-Wan. "I should've just kept my big nose out of it," the girl said, looking at the ground miserably. "I bet he can't stand to be around me now." Lena regarded her Padawan. "No, Kyrana, I'm sure he doesn't hate you. You're probably the only person who noticed he was so upset and he reacted in a strange way because of it. But maybe we should go speak to Master Jinn. Perhaps there is something wrong with Obi-Wan." "Or perhaps it was just a teenage boy thing," Kyrana joked half-heartedly. She'd made a big enough fool of herself in front of Obi-Wan and she really didn't want to repeat the performance to his Master. Lena looked as uncertain as her Padawan felt. "Maybe." From up ahead, the Master/Padawan team saw and heard a group of people move out of the way as a smaller figure came running toward them. Most of them let out angry remarks-...No running in the corridors!...Watch out!...Where's the fire kid?... The small figure sprinted past Lena and Kyrana. Kyrana watched him speed past them. "Master that was Obi-Wan!" she claimed as she watched him disappear into a stairwell. Lena frowned. "I wonder where he's going." "Shall I go after him?" Kyrana asked. Lena shook her head. "No, give him some time alone. Can't you sense his despair? I think we should give him some time." Kyrana paused for a moment and tentatively stretched out with the Force. She caught on to the emotions of Obi-Wan Kenobi, like the scent of food lingering in the air. She bit her lip. The boy was definitely upset over something. "Maybe we should tell his Master then?" Kyrana suggested. Lena's frown deepened. Something told her they were treading on some very personal matters here that did not concern them. She warned her Padawan of this. "But Master..." Kyrana began to protest. "No Kyrana!" Lena said sharply. "It is none of our business!" Kyrana bowed her head. "As you wish Master," she said dutifully and carried on walking home, her feeling ambiguous. ***** Qui-Gon still stood staring at the door, his face twitching with the onslaught of emotions that rushed through him like a torrent. He felt anger, betrayal, hurt. Yet, in the very pit of his stomach, he felt remorse and guilt. What had he just done? What had happened? What was going through Obi-Wan's head when he screamed all that�nonsense�? No� those were his true feelings. /He doesn't understand! He doesn't realise how badly you've been hurt in the past! He should understand that it's difficult for you!/ Qui-Gon's shoulder's jerked a little after these thoughts ran through his head. Were these *his* true feelings about Obi-Wan? The tall Jedi Master found himself sinking to the carpet. This was a nightmare. It had to be. Was he really that selfish? /Xanatos hurt you terribly. You should have realised by now no one would ever understand how you changed after everything-especially yet another teenage boy who is likely to go down the same path.../ Qui-Gon shook his head to dispel the nasty thoughts. He knew he shouldn't be thinking such horrible things. /When the boy returns-and he will do- you can take him to the Council had give him away. Yoda was wrong this time. Obi-Wan was not destined to be your Padawan. No one out there could possibly be good enough for you. No one. There's only one person you can rely on./ "Myself," Qui-Gon whispered. He hugged his knees to his chest. Yes, he could only rely on himself, no one else. No one else came close. "Why Xani?" Qui-Gon began to cry like a little lost boy. "Why did you leave me this way?" ***** He didn't care where he was going, all he was aware of was the fact that he had to get away from the place he had just been in. And he couldn't go back. /I can't go back to that. Not now that I've said all those things. If I'd kept my mouth closed, if I'd been more patient then maybe he would have changed. But no, I had to say those things and if he hated before, now he must want to kill me./ Obi-Wan kept running. It was dark out. It was only the early evening but there was a storm going on and Obi-Wan was right in the thick of it. Rain lashed down from the skies, spattering Obi-Wan's face and mixing in with his tears. His breath came in short sobs and his face was a mask of misery. His cheek still throbbed with both the memory and the remaining mark of Qui-Gon's punch. It would be a bruise soon. /He hates you, can't stand you. Never wants to be around you. That's why he hit you. You anger him so much; words cannot express it, only actions such as this. Worthless boy. Did you really think after *everything* that happened he would just take you back? You abandoned him, no, betrayed his trust on Melida/Daan. He may have taken you back but you should've known it would end like this./ More tears fell. /Yes, but I wanted to believe everything would be fine. I didn't want to think what it would like if this happened. I was content just to live in a fantasy world and let the real world pass me by./ He had to stop running now. He could barely breathe. /I just wanted to be loved/ he thought, heartbroken. /I didn't want to be alone anymore./ In the downpour, Obi-Wan found himself sitting on bench by a small park. Freezing rain trickled down his body and a cold wind buffeted his body as he pulled his knees up to his chest and place his forehead on the tops of them. Sobbing, he began to rock himself slowly, unaware that someone in the shadows was watching him. The cold eyes of the man spying on Obi-Wan grinned, a twisted, ugly expression that contained no mirth, only evil. /Soon little Padawan, you will know the meaning real of loneliness./ Smothering a laugh, the man walked away. He passed right by Obi-Wan, but the boy was too upset to notice. He headed for the Jedi Temple, the twisted grin never once leaving his face. Back on the bench, Obi-Wan Kenobi shuddered violently. But he did not link it to the dark presence that passed over his consciousness. ***** It was midnight yet Qui-Gon Jinn was not asleep. A storm raged outside. He was sitting in the dark room of his home, waiting. Many feelings assaulted him while he nursed a glass of some kind of alcohol. A storm raged inside. He was not a drinker but tonight, something inside him insisted that he drank himself into oblivion. He had already consumed far too much for a normal man. If he weren't a Jedi, he'd probably be suffering from alcohol poisoning by now. /That's two you've lost now. Nice going Jinn./ Qui-Gon swirled the contents of his glass around. /Maybe it's not them, maybe it's you./ His grip on the glass tightened. /One of them is out there in the galaxy destroying good, innocent people./ The glass was nearly cracking under the strain. /And the other one is out there somewhere lost and confused./ He lifted the glass closer to his mouth. /Which one will die first? The one you long to run a lightsaber through, or the one who's going to die from misery? Either way, you'll be responsible for their deaths./ He downed the drink. A few minutes later, he was heaving in the 'fresher. ***End Part Two*** |
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