A few hours later I was woken up by someone poking me in the side. Slowly I opened my eyes only to see Benji standing in front of me, with a cheesy grin on his face.
�Go away.� I pulled the hood of my sweatshirt over my head and rolled over so my back was towards him.
�Wake-y Wake-y!� He said in a singsong voice.
�Seriously though leave me alone!�
If there was anything I hated more it was being woken up just to be annoyed by someone.
He resumed poking me in the side. �Wake up and come talk to me.�
�Go talk to someone else.� I grumbled and swatted his hand away.
�Everyone else is busy and doesn�t want to talk to me.�
�Imagine that.� Hopefully he can catch on to my sarcasm.
�If you don�t get up in 3 seconds, I�ll get you up myself.� He threatened.
Maybe if I ignore him he�ll get the point I don�t want to talk.
�1�2�2 and a half�2 and three quarters�3.�
As soon as the last number left his mouth he quickly slipped his left arm behind my back and his right under my legs and lifted me out of my bunk.
�Hey! I was trying to sleep.�
�Well now your not, now your gonna come talk to me.� He carried me into the back lounge and placed me on the couch.
�You know I could get use to being carried everywhere.� I said with a smile. �who do I have to talk to about that?�
There was no possible way I was gonna be able to go back to sleep now, so I might as well talk to him.
Benji laughed. �You�re my personal assistant, not the other way around remember.�
�Wrong�I�m the whole bands personal assistant. Speaking of which where is everyone else?�
I suddenly realized that no one else was in sight and our two voices were the only to be heard.
Benji sat down next to me and began flipping through the TV stations. He smelled good. I�m surprised I didn�t notice that earlier when I was in his arms�I mean when he was carrying me.
�They�re in their bunks�probably asleep. We had a late night too.�
Ugh. What an asshole. Everyone else gets to sleep but me, how is that fair?
�Ok, cause that�s not fair! How come I have to be awake if everyone else doesn�t?�
�Cause I�d like to get to know yah, know yah�yeah!�
I shook my head and laughed. Someone had been watching a little too much �Jay and Silent Bob�, and it wasn�t me.
�What if everyone else wants to get to know me too?� I questioned.
�But they don�t. They hate you.� He said matter of factly.
Ouch. That hurt. Even though I know its true he could�ve at least pretended that it wasn�t. Not that it really bothers me anyway cause so far I really don�t like rest of the guys either.
�I kinda figured that would happen. Most guys tend to hate me after I�ve insulted their girlfriends.�
Benji raised his eyebrows trying to look surprised. �Oh so you insult a lot of peoples girlfriends do you?�
�I don�t insult them per se�I just call them as I see them. If they�re money-grubbing preppy ass bitches, then they are money-grubbing preppy ass bitches. There�s no disguising that.�
Benji let out a little laugh and shook his head. �Always gotta talk smack about the preps.�
Did I just miss something? Is Mr. Punk himself ridiculing me for not liking preps?
I noticeably surveyed his wardrobe, which consisted of black dickies pants and a Rancid shirt. �Oh like you don�t? I would find it very hard to believe that you actually speak highly of people such as the Mattel Triplets. Besides, I don�t hate preppy people. It just so happens that all the people I hate are preppy.�
Benji cocked his head to the side and scrunched his eyebrows. �There�s a difference?�
I shook my head.
�Whatever�I�m just trying to give you a hard time. I speak anything but highly of the Mattel Triplets. All three of them are evil.�
Benji continued flipping through the TV stations. Actually, he hadn�t stopped since he turned it on when he sat down beside me. He flipped past MTV but then turned the channel back when he realized they were playing Christina Aguilera�s �Dirrty� video.
God, please save me. I hate this video. I don�t have anything against Christina Aguilera personally. She is very talented and has an amazing voice. I just hate this video. Mostly because when guys see it they go retarded. Its like they can�t function when they see a half naked girl dancing around like a stripper.
I looked over at Benji. His mouth was wide-open�drool almost coming out the sides. See what I mean, they go retarded.
�Oh please!� I playfully shoved him, snapping him out of his sex-induced trance.
�What!? I�m admiring her dancing abilities. She�s got skills!�
He tried to defend himself, but was failing miserably.
�Whatever.� I rolled my eyes. �It doesn�t take 2 neurons to dance like that.�
�Your just jealous cause you can�t dance like that.�
Why is it that anytime a girl says something negative about another girl, guys blame it on jealousy? Dancing like that really doesn�t take more than two neurons.
�I can so dance like that!�
I got up and started shakin my booty in Benji�s face, tryin to do my most exaggerated Christina impression. It wasn�t a pretty sight, but nonetheless it was amusing.
Benji began laughing very hard. I guess he didn�t think my skills measured up to those of Christina�s. He grabbed his wallet out of his back pocket with his right hand and pulled a dollar bill out with his left. He raised up my hoodie a little bit and stuffed the bill in the back pocket of my jeans.
�Whats this?� He pulled my hoodie up higher in the back and indicated the label of my jeans.
Quickly I pulled away from his reach and pulled my hoodie back down.
�Your wearing Abercromie jeans!� He gasped.
�No, I�m not.� I said trying to deny it.
The truth is, yes, I wear Abercrombie jeans. In my defense they are the only jeans I can find that fit me well.
�Yes you are. Let me see.�
He stood up from the couch and reached for my hoodie, but I stepped out of his grasp. He tried several more times and still I managed to successfully avoid him. Finally he got a hold of me and threw me over his shoulder like a sac of potatoes. I began lightly hitting him on his back and swearing at him to let me down. When he refused, I began kicking my feet. This threw him off balance and sent us both to the floor�laughing hysterically about how big of jackass� we were being.
In between laughs I heard someone clear their throat. I looked up to see Paul standing in the doorway. We must have gotten too loud and woke him up. He looked at Benji (who was laying on top of me) and I, then to the couch a few feet away where we had previously been. He had a very disapproving look on his face. I followed his stare over to the couch, and noticed that he was looking at Benji�s wallet on the floor, or more specifically the condom that was lying beside it. It must have fallen out of Benji�s wallet when he dropped it trying to read the label on my jeans.
Paul looked back at us, crossed his arms and shook his head. �Don�t waste anytime do you Benj?� He then turned his back and walked back to his bunk.
After Paul was out of sight. Benji and I busted out with laughter again, knowing very well that Paul was probably thinking that Benji was tryin to screw me.
This is gonna be one interesting tour.
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