(Drew Carey, modified by Jenn)
One month and nine days until I can legally join that support group. Not that I'm counting.
Actually, I'm really not. I had to get out my calendar to check out how many days it actually was.
But yes, October 4th I can legally do what I've been doing for years. Of course, I'm sort of dreading turning 21. Strange but true. Allow me to back up a little, mainly because I haven't updated my journal since July and there's a huge reason that I don't want to be 21 that you all need to know about
Aaron and I are back together, which happened on July 4th. Anyone who wants to do some quicky math will realize that that date is exactly three months from my 21st birthday. This causes a problem.
Aaron really does not want me to be 21 because he's afraid that I'll go out all the time, get drunk and misbehave and do all the stupid stuff I've already done. Granted, in the past these things may have been true, but the reason I would go out is because I had no reason to stay home. There was no motivating factor for me to behave. The big difference now is that I have a boyfriend who, for some reason or another, loves me despite being the anal retentive worrying psychopath that I am. I honestly do not think that anyone could love me as much as he does and I would be a fool to trade that for some drunken debauchery. As I told Julie "Miller Lite is not worth ruining a relationship for."
I told him that I wouldn't go out if it would make him feel better. At all. I wouldn't even go out for my birthday with my close friends if it were really going to upset him that much. And while yes, my close friends have gotten me to flash an Amish buggy, put a penis candle in my pants and scream at animated Hershey Kisses in Canada, they would also respect me and not let me do anything that I didn't want to do.
While I would like to spend the evening out with a few good friends, it means more to me to be sober and in a happy loving relationship than to be wasted and alone.
So the jury is still out of what is to become of Oct 4th, but no matter what happens with the bar scene, I will (hopefully) be able to tell you that it has been 3 months since Aaron and I got back together...and somewhere along the lines of two and a half years that we've been "us"
All right, it's getting really freaking sappy in here and scarily enough, it's because of me. When I start to make myself sick with love and mushy stuff, that's when I know it's time to end the entry.
But in closing, I would like to point out that I can understand why he feels the way he does. The first time we were together, I was out with some friends and I overheard someone make the off-handed comment that the two biggest relationship killers are going to college for the first time (that would be him) and turning 21 (that would be me)...and since we're 2/2 I'm not about to bitch. Plus we've all seen the pictures...we know what USED to occur, so if I need to prove that I can behave, then so be it.
We'll just have to take pictures of me sitting in my house in Stroudsburg knitting an afgahn or darning some socks so there can be before and after pictures of old Meg and new Meg.
I look forward to the day when there is only ONE Meg that we speak of.
Baby, I love you
(sorry, that's the last of the couple-y stuff...for this entry anyway)