Author: Sue Christian
Summary: A seasonal visitor ensures that the Enterprise guys and gals get what they really want for Christmas.
Pairing: M/M and M/F among the regular characters.
Rating: PG13 – it’s suggestive, but not explicit.
Disclaimer: All characters and things Enterprise belong to Paramount, I just like to take them out and play with them occasionally. I make no money from this and have nothing that’d make it worth anyone’s while suing me.
Author’s Note: This is a silly little offering written on the spur of the moment. No Beta reader, all the mistakes are my own.
Feedback: Yes please. Send to [email protected]
Enterprise had answered a distress call from an alien vessel that had suffered engine damage during an ion storm and the small red alien ship was now docked alongside.
For such a small ship it’s sure got a peculiar crew, Commander Trip Tucker thought to himself as he made his way to the engine room to assist with repairs. So far he’d passed what looked to him like midgets, elves and fairies, and when he arrived at his destination some of the engineers were large brown quadrupeds with many-branched horns.
An hour or two later back on the bridge of Enterprise Captain Archer was having much the same sort of thoughts about the alien Captain, a humanoid male with white hair and beard and a voluminous red outfit for a uniform. Trip had brought Captain Santclos back with him so that he could personally pass on his thanks for the help he’d received.
‘Captain Archer,’ Santclos said, ‘since you and your officers have been so good I’d like to do something for you all in return. Let me ask each of you what it is you’d like most.’
The bridge crew looked at him as if he were mad, but he just smiled back at them, and turning to Hoshi asked, ‘What about you my dear, what is your heart’s desire?’
‘Well, I’m a linguist so I suppose what I would really like is a new alien tongue to concentrate on,’ she replied.
Santclos nodded and continued asking each officer in turn.
‘I am a Vulcan,’ T’Pol said. ‘I don’t have desires, but I confess I am intrigued by humanity in general and by human customs.’
‘I’d like a good workout programme for my gluteus maximus,’ Trip said patting his backside. ‘It’s the one part of my body I have difficulty finding good exercises for.’
‘An exciting new dangerous weapon to play with,’ Malcolm said, dragging his eyes away from Trip’s backside. ‘The bigger the better.’
‘I’d like the opportunity to fly Enterprise to her limits,’ Travis said, with an apologetic glance at the Captain. ‘To see what she can really do.’
‘I’ve always been interested in languages,’ said Phlox, who was on the bridge purely for the purposes of this story, ‘so I suppose I’d like some of Ensign Sato’s linguistic skill.’
‘Oh, I’m just happy doing what I am,’ the Captain said. ‘Following the dream of finding new worlds and new civilisations.’
Now when Father Christmas (go on, you did know it was him didn’t you?) asks you what you really want it doesn’t much matter what answer your mouth gives because he can see into your mind and your dreams and find your one true wish. So when Santclos beamed happily around the bridge and told them that he hoped their wishes would come true little did they know what they were in for.
‘Well, much as I’d love to spend more time with you folk, it’s 24th December and I have work to do,’ Santclos said. ‘However I do have a small gift for you.’ He produced a crystal bottle containing a golden liquid that shimmered and sparkled as he handed it to Captain Archer. ‘Do me a favour, will you, and drink my health tonight after you come off duty. All of you together, Captain. Promise?’
‘I promise,’ Captain Archer said, humouring the strange old man.
It was nearly midnight and the alpha watch bridge crew were the only people in the mess hall. Captain Archer had insisted that they honour their alien visitor’s request and they had gathered there to drink a toast to Santclos’s health. Archer filled seven glasses, there was just enough of the shimmering liquid, and handed them out. ‘To Santclos,’ he said and they all raised their glasses and drank. The soft ringing of sleigh bells and the sparkle of stardust in the air went unnoticed.
‘Travis, I’m sorry about this,’ Captain Archer said, ‘but I’m going to have to ask you to pull a double shift.'
‘No problems, Captain,’ the helmsman answered, a little unconvincingly.
‘I really am sorry,’ Archer stressed. ‘But if it’ll make you feel any better, I’m putting you in charge for the night. You have the bridge, Ensign.’
‘Oh, right, sir,’ Travis said looking considerably brighter. ‘I’d better get up there then. And he swallowed the rest of his drink and left.
‘Well, I don’t know about the rest of you, but I’m for my bed.’ The Captain put down his empty glass and stood.
‘I’ll walk with you, Captain,’ T’Pol said, finishing her drink.
The two of them entered the turbolift and Archer pressed the button for their deck. The lift started to move then shuddered to a halt. The violence of the movement made both officers stagger and suddenly they were pressed up against each other. T’Pol with her back to the wall and Archer leaning in towards her, his hands on the bulkhead, one either side of her head.
‘I’m sorry,’ he said.
She looked him in the eyes. ‘Are you?’
‘No, not really. Truth to tell I’ve often imagined myself in this position.’ Then he leaned even closer and gently kissed her on the lips.
When he finally broke off the kiss, T’Pol said, ‘As have I, Jonathon,’ and she clasped the back of his neck with one hand and pulled him back down into another, less gentle kiss.
Back in the mess hall Hoshi stood and stretched. ‘I’m not at all sleepy but I suppose I should go to bed too. Come on, Doctor,’ she said. ‘I’ll walk you back to sickbay.’
When they reached sickbay Phlox turned to Hoshi. ‘Are you really having trouble sleeping, Ensign?’ he asked. ‘Perhaps I could give you something for that?’
‘Oh, I’m sure you could,’ Hoshi breathed, slipping her arms round his neck and standing on tiptoe to give him a kiss.
After a moment of uncertainty he kissed her back. She parted her lips and Phlox let his tongue, his extremely long and agile tongue, slide into her mouth. Still locked in a passionate embrace they managed to open the doors and fall inside the dark and empty sickbay.
‘Well that just leaves the two of us then,’ Trip said, tipping his glass at Malcolm before downing the rest of the contents. ‘I suppose we should go to bed too.’
‘That sounds like a nice idea,’ Malcolm said. He stopped playing with his empty glass and stood, walking round the table to look down lasciviously at the Commander.
‘What are you suggestin’, Lieutenant?’ Trip drawled, his eyes running up and down Malcolm’s fit muscular body before finally coming to rest on his ass.
‘Maybe I could suggest some new exercises for your gluteus maximus. Not to mention arranging a workout for some of your other essential equipment,’ Malcolm said. He leaned on the table and reached forward to rest a hand on the growing bulge at the Commander’s groin.
‘Ya know, suddenly bed sounds rather a good idea.’ Trip got to his feet and they strolled out of the mess hall, both of them with their hands where they shouldn’t have been.
All of which goes to prove that if you’re good Father Christmas will bring you what you want, because after all:
Captain Archer got to go where no man has gone before and T’Pol began her research into the human customs (not the mention the human man) in which she was really interested.
Trip finally got the nice ass he’d been dreaming about and Malcolm got his hands on the ‘dangerous weapon’ he’d been lusting after for months.
Dr. Phlox got his tongue round the only language he was really interested in – the language of love, and Hoshi got her mouth (and other parts of her anatomy) round a new alien tongue.
Travis, as usual, was left without much to do. But he was in charge of the Enterprise, so he took her up to warp 5 and flung her around the galaxy a bit, practising fancy turns and evasive manoeuvres, because that really was what he wanted for Christmas.
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