"Are you sure, Trip?"  Archer was astonished.  "I would have thought you'd jump at the chance."

Trip sighed.  "Captain, I don't think I could walk to the launch bay without falling down.  No," and he shook his head, "I'd better stay put.  Thanks for asking, though."

Archer went to the couch and sat.  Suddenly, the idea of spending some time on the uninhabited planet they were currently orbiting was not half as appealing as it had been five minutes ago.  He looked over at Trip, lying on his bed, arm over his eyes.  He hadn't realized how much he was looking forward to Trip's company during this excursion.

Trip spoke again.  "Besides, I'm sure by now you'd like a break."

"A break?"

"From me.  From being woken up every night because of my damn nightmares.  From having to tip-toe around me all the time.  And from all the rest of it.  Must be pretty tiring.  I'd imagine that by now, you're sick and tired of having to look at me."

"Actually, you're wrong."  Archer spoke lightly, but realized it was true, nevertheless.  Even when he was sick and in distress, Trip was good company.

Trip took his arm away and stared at the Captain.  "You have got to be kidding."

"Nope."

"Damn – you really do need a holiday."

"So do you."

"You don't give up, do you?" Trip asked wonderingly.

"Nope."

Trip sighed again.  "Captain, please.  Like I said.  These damn meds – I'm still wobbly.  I walk any farther than the bathroom and I'm scared I'm going to pass out.  How can I go downplanet like that?"

"So who said anything about walking?"  Archer replied.  Trip simply looked at him like he'd lost his mind.  "I wasn't planning on asking you to go mountain climbing or hiking, you know."

"Then what?  I sit under a tree and do some bird-watching?"

"Why not?"  Trip had no response to that.  Archer, sensing an advantage, forged onward.  "We'll take your wheelchair.  You won't over-exert yourself in that.  A little sunshine, a little fresh air – do you good."

Trip still looked uncertain.  "I don't know ..."

Archer understood.  "Uninhabited, Trip."  Trip didn't look entirely convinced.  "You won't be left alone," Archer reassured him.

Trip shook his head.  "Stupid of me, I know."

"No, it isn't.  You wouldn't be human if you didn't feel this way.  But tell me something, Trip – are you really going to let them win?"

*  *  *

"Take it easy, Commander.  Here, I've got you."

"Thanks, Travis."

"Okay, here's your wheelchair."

Trip blinked.  It was a beautiful bright sunny day, and his eyes weren't used to it.  He felt a nudge, looked over.  Mayweather was holding a pair of sunglasses.  "Thanks," he said again, and swayed slightly.

"Commander, you'd better sit down," the ensign advised.

"Good idea," Trip agreed faintly, and allowed Travis to help him into his chair.

Enterprise's helmsman then pointed out across the meadow.  "See that big tree over there?"  At the engineer's nod, he continued.  "It's actually sitting at the top of a little hill that slopes down to the lake."

Trip looked up at him.  "And?"

"And the Captain told me to tell you that's your bird-watching spot."

*  *  *

"So, how's it going?"  Archer sat down beside Trip, who was lying on a blanket underneath the spreading branches of a tree that was eerily similar to an earth oak tree.

"Um," the younger man said drowsily.  "I must have dozed off."  He sat up, yawned.  "But before I did, I counted six of those blue birds, eight of the ones with the red dots on their backs, and about a million of those brown-and-yellow ones."  He looked at Archer, smiled slightly.  "Want me to write a report for Subcommander T'Pol?"

Archer grinned.  "'About a million'," he quoted.  "I can just imagine what she'd say about that."

"Well, I might have exaggerated a little bit," Trip admitted.  "But those little guys are everywhere.  Bold as all get-out, too.  One of 'em landed on my blanket, and looked at me as if to say, who the hell are you and what are you doing under my tree?"

"Write a report like that and our Vulcan will have a logical meltdown."

"Aw – I wouldn't want to drive her that crazy.  I kind of owe her," he added by way of explanation.  "Malcolm told me she cracked the bank codes.  On Tasumi."

Archer nodded.  Trip looked up.  "Getting late," he said.  "I'd better get Travis to take me back to Enterprise."  He sighed.  "Nice place, though.  Thanks for talking me into coming down, Captain."

"Why are you going back to Enterprise if you like it down here so much?  I'm going to pitch a tent and stay the night."

"Right," said Trip.  "And at 3 in the morning, I'll have a nightmare, and my screams will wake the whole damn crew up."  He shook his head.  "Better not."

"You're exaggerating again, Trip."

Trip cocked a wry brow at this.  "You going to sit there and tell me that I sleep like a lamb all night?"

"No.  But you don't make that much noise."

"Even if that's true, I don't think the Chief Engineer crying in his sleep is something the crew should be hearing."

"Well, I thought I'd set my tent up around here," said Archer.  "I have no idea where the rest of them will be, though."

Trip was wavering.  "Sounds nice.  Going to build a fire?"

Archer nodded.  "And then lay back and watch the stars come out.  See if I can find Sol."

Trip exhaled, looked narrowly at the Captain.  "You know, you fight really dirty," he said.  "You do realize that, don't you?"

*  *  *

Archer woke, turned over in his sleeping bag.  Trip was whimpering quietly in his sleep.  "Trip," he said gently, "You're all right."  The younger man moaned softly.

Archer put a gentle hand on his shoulder.  "You're safe," he assured him.  Trip, still sleeping, turned in his own bag.  His blond head was now only inches from the Captain's.  He cried out softly.

Archer sighed, put his arms around the sleeping man.  He could feel Trip trembling.  Even in his sleep, he thought.  What little he had heard of Trip's story had been horrifying enough; God only knew what else his friend had been subjected to.  What other nightmares I don't know about are romping through that head of yours right now?  "You're all right," he murmured again. 

Trip sighed, and Archer could feel him starting to relax.  His breathing became slower, quieter, and his shivering stopped.

Archer thought he would hold him for just a few minutes longer, in order to be certain he was all right, and then gently disengage.  He closed his own eyes.  And fell asleep.

*  *  *

He awoke the next morning to find Trip curled up against him, deeply asleep.  Archer still had an arm draped across the younger man, and hurriedly, he removed it.  This was just getting all too strange for words.  Although if he were totally honest with himself, there was something about Trip's slight form against his own that felt – that felt right, goddammit!

The tent flap pushed open, and a pair of doggy eyes regarded him.  "You're up early," Archer observed.  At this, Porthos ran into the tent, galloping across Trip's prone form and leaping with joyous abandon onto Archer's chest.  Archer fell back, and helpless with laughter, tried to fend off the beagle's affectionate licks.

At this, Trip awoke.  Porthos proceeded to leap on him, and subject him to the same wake-up call.  Trip grinned.  "Four legged alarm clock," he said.  His duty done, Porthos scampered out of the tent.  "Busy," Trip observed.

"Lots to do," Archer agreed.  There was a moment's comfortable silence.  "How'd you sleep, Trip?"

"Actually, pretty good," Trip said, sounding surprised.  "I don't remember any bad dreams, anyhow.  Maybe it's all this fresh air.  Or something."

"Or something."

*  *  *

Trip felt someone's presence beside him.  Reluctantly, he put his binoculars down.  He had become quite engrossed in the small dramas taking place amongst the feathered set on the lake below.

He looked up to see Subcommander T'Pol giving him her calm regard.  "Commander."

"Subcommander," he replied.

"I would not have thought you interested in ornithology."

"Generally, no," he admitted.  "But I'm kind of limited, seeing as I'm not really mobile yet.  So the Captain gave me these," indicating the binoculars, "as a way to pass the time."

"I see," the Vulcan replied.

"Why don't you sit down?" He invited.  "Looking up at you is giving me a stiff neck."

She complied.

"Find anything interesting?" he asked.

"Dr. Phlox is quite enthused over some of the flora and fauna here," was her reply.

"Great," Trip sighed.  "More potions."

"That seems to be a rather peculiar attitude," she said.  "I would have thought that you would be appreciative of the doctor's expertise."

"Oh, I am, I am," Trip said hastily.  "Don't get me wrong on that count.  But if you had to take as many pills and such-like as I've been taking, you might understand my point of view."

"I see," she replied, although he knew she did not.  He also knew trying to explain further would only confuse matters more. 

Instead, he said, "I hear I owe you a big thanks."

She raised a brow.  "For your help," he added.  "With the Tasumi bank codes and all that."

"Enterprise needed her chief engineer back.  I merely did what was required in order to achieve that."

Trip counted to ten.  "Maybe.  But you ought to know by now that we poor struggling humans have this emotional need to say thanks.  So, I am."

"Then – you are welcome."

He was mildly surprised.  "Oh.  Okay.  But I still owe you."

She did not immediately reply to this.  Instead, she turned and gave him a deep, searching look that seemed to last forever.  Finally, she asked, "Commander – how are you?"

He was astonished.  He knew that Vulcans did not engage in so-called "small talk", so she was expecting a more detailed answer than a simple "okay" from him.

He sighed.  "Really?  Well, I have some good days – like today.  But I also have one helluva lot more bad days."

"The memories of what happened to you.  They are troubling?"

"That's putting it mildly."

She contemplated the lake for a moment.  Then:  "I may be able to offer you some assistance in that area."

*  *  *

Archer came up beside Trip.  The younger man was lost in thought, a million miles away – or more. 

"Trip?"  He was worried.  "You all right?"

Trip started, minutely.  "Sorry, Captain."

Archer sat beside him.  "Looks like you've got something on your mind."

"That's for damn sure."  At Archer's look of surprise, he explained.  "T'Pol was just here.  And she made me the damnedest offer I've ever heard."

"Which was?"

"She said that she could use telepathic contact to 'submerge' those memories that are bothering me.  That I'd forget what happened."  He looked at Archer.  "Doesn't that just beat all?"

"It sure does.  Going to take her up on it?"

"I don't know," Trip said slowly.  "I'd be a liar if I said it wasn't real tempting.  No more bad dreams.  No more feeling dirty all the time.  Not feeling them – hearing them – seeing them all the time in my mind's eye.  I'd like that."  He looked at Archer.  "Kind of the coward's way out, though, isn't it?"

"You're a lot of things, Trip, but a coward?  No.  That's the last word I'd use to describe you."

Trip was silent.  "It's real tempting," he finally said again.  "And yet, it doesn't feel right.  Does that make any sense to you?  I mean, here's a nice, neat solution to all my problems.  Practically tied up in a big red bow.  I could go off all the meds.  Get back on active duty.  Get on with my life.  And yet ..."  He feel silent, brooding.

"It's not a one-time offer, is it?" Archer asked.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, you can say 'no' today and 'yes' tomorrow if you want, right?"

"Pretty much.  She said she was willing 'at any time'."

"Then why not leave it at that?  It's an option you now know you have.  If you – and Phlox – think it's the way to go, then go that way.  If not, then don't.  Whatever works, Trip.  But don't reject anything that might help out of hand."

"Sounds like a good idea."  He smiled faintly.  "You could have knocked me over with a feather when she made the offer.  I didn't know she cared."

Archer grinned.  "Sometimes I think she makes a career out of surprising all of us poor dumb humans."  Trip nodded.

"Speaking of feathers..." Archer continued.

"Oh, yeah.  Captain, you should see what these little guys have been up to.  I swear ... "

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