I have hated Jessica Simpson for quite some time now. Then it comes to my attention that her little sister is trying to cash in on Jessica's sucess. So out of curiosity, I watched a little bit of "The Ashlee Simpson Show". 5 minutes was all it took for me to be completely disgusted. Her show is what inspired me to finally start this site. I cannot believe that no one else finds it insane that this is the "entertainment" we are subjected to anymore.
OK, first of all, she is riding her sister's coattails ENTIRELY. There isn't a snowball's chance in hell that Ashlee Simpson would have made a name for herself without Jessica. She has a mediocre singing voice, average looks, and the personality of a dust bunny. Then, in one riveting episode of her show, she's arguing with producer-type guys saying, "Don't make me like Jessica!" BITCH, if it wasn't for Jessica, you wouldn't have a career!!!!!!!!
Ashlee comes off as the most whiny, spoiled, immature little brat ever. I couldn't believe it when I found out that little slut was 19 years old. She acts no older than 14. She's always bitching about something, acting all dramatically frustrated when she can't sing something right. Bitch, you can't sing. I know a lot of Ashlee fans are going to try and tell me "Autobiography debuted at #1 So she MUST be a good singer so, nnnyyyaaaaaaa" First of all, I just have to slip this in, "Autobiography" has to be the most unorginal album name I've ever heard, and second of all, lots of SHIT debutes at #1, and its still SUCKS. Here's a list of albums, just for example, that have "debuted at #1":
Clay Aiken "Measure of a Man"
Mariah Carrey "Glitter"
Brittney Spears "Oops I did it again"
Michael Jackson "Dangerous"
Creed "Human Clay"
Radiohead "We Hate everyone in the World. Please don't buy this album. Its Rubbish."
Garth Brooks "Ropin the Wind"
Smashing Pumpkins "Mellon Collie & the Infinite Sadness"
Now, Im not saying that all these albums suck, I happen to like Radiohead and Smashing Pumpkins. My point is, anyone could make a case against any of these albums saying that it SUCKS, despite the fact that they "debuted at #1".
The other fact you have to face is, Ashlee's album would not have debuted at #1 if not for her reality show. She would have sold a couple hundred copies of her album TOPS if not for that train wreck of a show. Each show is like a brutal, 30 minute commercial for her album. Rarely does an artist get that much time to hawk their album. That show is seriously a form of torture, though. You know what else gets to me about that show? She's always whining and crying about how exhausting it is interviewing and traveling and all that stuff. Oh boo hoo, I'll just cry a river for you. She wouldn't make it 10 seconds in a real job, she is such a wuss.
One last thing about her that irks me SO much... She tries to act like she's punk, but she is so far from punk its not even funny. Just because you are a punk, doesn't mean that the music you crap out is punk.
So thats it for my rant about Jessica and Ashlee Simpson. If you have a rant about either one of these two, or both, feel free to send it to me. I will definitly put up the ones I like.
