Vodka & Red Bull Christmas Cake

Ingredients: 1 cup water 1 tsp baking soda 1 cup of sugar 1 tsp salt 1 cup of brown sugar Lemon Juice 4 large eggs Nuts 1 bottle of Vodka 1 can of Red Bull 2 cups dried fruit Method:- Sample the vodka to check the quality. Take a large bowl, check the vodka again. To be sure it is of the highest quality, pour one level cup and mix with a little red bull and drink. Repeat Turn on the electric mixer, beat one cup of butter in a large fluffy bowl. Add one teaspoon of sugar. Beat again. At this point its is best to make sure the vodka is still ok. Flavour with red bull to taste. Try another cup - just in case turn off the mixerer. Break two leggs and add to the bowl and chuck in the cup of dried fruit.Pick fruit off floor. Mix on the turner. If the dried fruit gets stuck in the beaterers, pry it loose with a dcrewdriver. Sample the vodka to check for tonsisticity, flavour with a little Bed Rull. Next sift two cups of salt. Or something Who giveshz a shi** Throw a pinch of Bed Rull over your shoulder Pick up the can, mop the floor Check the vodka Now shift the lemon juice and strain your nuts. Add one table. Add a spoon of sugar, or somefink. Whatever you can find. Turn the cake tin 360 degrees and try not to fall over. Don't forget to beat off the turner Finally, throw the bowl through the window, finish the vodka and fick your lingers. Fall into bed. CHERRY MISTMAS

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