Homework: How much help from parents is too much?

Wednesday, July 12, 2006; Posted: 11:58 a.m. EDT (15:58 GMT)

NEW YORK (AP) -- Parents don't like to see their children struggle. They feel the pain of kids who are exasperated when they can't figure out a math problem, and they don't like to see kids bleary-eyed late at night while trying to finish a science project.

It's natural for parents to want to help. It might start out with a little cutting and pasting while the kids do the intellectual work on a model volcano. But that can lead to the parents' researching and assembling the whole slippery slope.

At what point does parental help cross the line and diminish the task's value for the student?

"The most important thing to remember about homework," says Richard Bavaria, vice president of education at Sylvan Learning Centers, is that it should "reinforce skills that they've learned in the classroom. It's practice."

If children ask for help, parental guidance is OK. Showing them how to research the answer is best, says Bavaria; doing the homework for them is not an option.

"Kids don't want parents to do their homework for them. They might say they do, but most kids know they need to know the information to get them through the rest of the year," he says.

Sometimes students just need parents to talk them through a tough assignment, either by suggesting ways to break it up into more manageable chunks or by helping them set specific goals.

"Homework shouldn't be a battle. It should be expected. It's as much a part of school as getting up and getting dressed each morning," says Anna Weselak, president of the National PTA. Other dos and don'ts for parents, from the experts:

  • Show your children how school subjects are put to practical use, employing math to balance a checkbook or figure out a tip at a restaurant.

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  • Don't dis your own school experience. Instead of saying, "I hated math, too," in an effort to empathize, try something more encouraging, such as, "I had a difficult time too, and here's how I conquered it."

     

     

  • Create an environment conducive to homework. Children should have a designated spot in the house that's clean, well lit and has the supplies they'll need. Keeping reference books, pens, pencils and rulers in one place can shave a substantial amount off homework time.

     

     

  • Designate a particular time of day for schoolwork. Some children need to burn off energy doing other things when they first get home from school, and can settle down later in the evening; others prefer to get the task done right away before they get distracted by other things. Bavaria recalls doing his own best work in the early morning.

     

     

  • Expect about 15 minutes of homework per night per grade level -- a first grader would have 15 minutes, a fourth grader an hour, and so on -- says Weselak. That's a standard recommended by the PTA and the National Education Association.

     

    Regular communication between parents and teachers about expectations can keep everyone on the right path, she says. Be wary of children who report night after night that they have no homework.

    On the other hand, if a child complains about way too much homework, or if it's taking far too long to complete it, it's fair for the parent to take up the issue with the teacher, Weselak says.

    "Kids do need some free time and sleep time. They need physical activity and to eat dinner. It can be hard to fit it all in," she says.

    FACT BOX

    Some more dos and don'ts, courtesy of the National PTA, for parents wondering how much to help with homework:

    1. Assume that your children will have homework every night.

    2. Ask them if they understand their assignments. If they don't, work a few examples together.

    3. Ask your children to see their homework after the teacher returns it, to learn where they're having trouble and where they're doing well.

    4. Stay in touch with teachers, and ask how you can help support their lessons.

    5. Remember, you and the teachers want the same thing: to help your children learn.

    6. Don't do your children's work for them. Help them learn to do it themselves.

    7. Show your children that you think homework is important. Ask to see their work if you haven't been home while they were doing it.

    8. Praise your children regularly for doing well.

    9. Keep a portfolio of "best pieces."

    10. Ask the school for tips on developing good study habits.

    11. Help older students organize assignments by recording them in a calendar or planner.

     
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