There is now a new administration in Washington. All Americans should stand up and give a loud cheer! Remember, the new pres not only received more votes than “Landslide Lyndon” in his first election, he did it at least three times! G.W. and his advisers, being in office only a short time, are in the process of returning some of our money. Hal-a-lu-ya!! For those of you getting your information from news anchors of the big three networks, let me give you the true GOP tax plan as I understand it. Their intent is to reduce the rate of confiscation imposed upon all Americans. Also the repeal of the “death tax” is in the works. We all know you can’t take it with you, but Uncle Sam just wanted to be sure you didn’t. The increased tax penalty for married folk will also be cut. (isn’t being married penalty enough?)

While the tax reduction plan of President Bush is way overdue and more than welcome, I don’t believe it goes far enough. Therefore I would like to submit my own plan ideal for the new Millennium. Using my faithful Abacus and counting my fingers and toes, I have developed a tax system far superior and more fair than any other available at this time. Before I release the details, let me warn you about two basic groups sure to voice their opposition. First would the Eggheads of academia, followed closely by the Airheads (liberals) in Government. They continue to remain convinced of their ability to always know what is best for us. Second, they not only want all of our money they can get, they also insist on telling us how to live. (Give me a break!)

To those of you thinking I’m dumber than my two dollar Timex, let me set the record straight! I grew up during the Hoover and Roosevelt administrations. If either had asked me back in those days what the most dangerous thing facing Americas’ future would be, I would have said Nuclear Proliferation! So I was ahead of my time. (didn’t work for Jimmy Carter either!) Actually the correct answer would be too many Democrats. Especially in the House, Senate, 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue and every State Assembly.

I have spent a great deal of time, at least two or three hours, researching and perfecting this tax proposal. It is so good even Al Gore would refuse to say “risky scheme”. This concept must be taken in its entirety for it to be effective. So pay attention! First, ALL existing local, state and federal taxes will be abolished. No exemptions of any kind will be allowed! Fees for permits and licenses may still be collected. Eight cents per dollar will be assessed against all GROSS income regardless of source. EVERY individual, business, corporation, church, foundation, any and all types of organization etc., receiving income from any source at any time will pay the same rate. No free rides, none!

These funds would be divided as follows: Two cents of the eight collected will support Social Security and Medicare to provide identical payouts to all retirees, including politicians and government employees. There will be no more million-dollar pensions for elected officials! (let’s see how they like living like the rest of us) Four cents would go into state treasuries to be used and forwarded to all localities on a per-capita basis. In this way all schools, for example, get the same monies regardless of their location. The final Two cents would be forwarded to the Federal Government to support the Nations’ military and other vital programs. Anything left over can be wasted as they usually do. Since it is difficult to trust any Government entity, I would suggest using some other agency (the Sopranos? Unions? The Mafia?) for collecting and handing out these funds. Maybe then we will know where our money goes!

I am convinced, after half-a-century of keeping an eye on Washington politicos, in order for any liberal such as Daschle or Gephardt to obtain leadership positions in Congress, they must swear to object to all things good for the Country. How else can one explain their reluctance to allow working Americans to keep some of their hard-earned money?

 Gene Mays

3/2/2001