Lost in Loss

my tears start
breaking my heart
bringing the pain
that i've kept away

i want to hate you
but all i can do is loathe myself
even more
because i'm just not enough
for yet another one
that just might've been able
to make me happy
who -did- make me happy
and still does
in a way
just by knowing he exists

i want more than anything
for him to come kiss my tears away
to say he was mistaken, so wrong
i didn't even know that i wanted
till i had
and i didn't know i needed
till i lost
always losing
forever lost
wandering lonely
i'm never alone
i'm alone all the time