Daddy

i can remember being so small
and letting you carry me down the hall
it was that night i was so afraid
Mom wouldn't come back, she'd run away
but you gave me some juice and read me a book
and tucked me in gently when i no longer shook
i never once doubted the love in your eyes
that's why the future was such a surprise

you threw down my cat and called me cruel names
i had grow so tired of your stupid games
i was still only tweleve...so, so young
but could no longer take the abuse, how it stung
so when your hand raised to hit me once more
my hands scratched your neck, i'd been keeping score
and by the end, we were both black and blue
hoarse from the screaming, was it worth it to you?

and now...now you're dying, just wasting away
so much pain and depression, i don't know what to say
i was so sure of my anger, my hatred for you
i know you deserved it, i guess you still do
but that's not so important as death beats on your door
it doesn't matter now, you're the father i adored
so all that i hope, with every piece of my heart
is you know that i love you before we must part