versus

MWF Xtreme Champion: The Hobo

Handicap Match

Referee: Chad Pattison

Writer: Paddy Stoate

JP: Well, here we go with a match made only three days ago by General Manager Insane Wayne.

Sully: It was a stroke of genius by our GM!

JP: What was, making a perfectly legitimate one-on-one contest into a Handicap match for our Extreme Champion?

Sully: Yeah! Great, isn't it?

JP: No, it is not great! Especially considering Wayne practically told us that he is only giving Hobo a Handicap match to soften him up for Iniquity, -if- he wins tonight.

Sully: Of course he will!

JP: Hmm, we'll see. Anyway, here comes the match!

[Peter Santos stands in the middle of the ring, holding a microphone.]

Santos: The following contest is scheduled for one fall, and is a Handicap match! Introducing first, at a combined weight of four hundred and eighty-four pounds, Tempest, and EniGma!

['Heart's Filthy Lesson' by David Bowie hits, and the two step out to tumultuous boos, and quickly walk down to the ring, ignoring the jeers and boos they receive. EniGma is wearing his black tights, complete with yellow lightning bolts. They slide into the ring, and await The Hobo's appearance. As they do, 'One Of A Can' by Breaking Point hits the PA, and The Hobo emerges onto the entranceway to great cheers. He is wearing the Extreme Title. As Peter Santos speaks, a small backstage technician runs down the ramp, and slides into the ring.]

Santos: And their opponent, weighing in at two hundred and thirteen pounds, he is the MWF Extreme Champion�The Hobo!

[The fans go wild at Hobo's name, but he does not get into the ring yet. He stands at the bottom of the ramp, eyeing up his opponents, and looks like he is about to climb the steps, when�BOOM! There is a huge explosion at the top of the ramp, and some unidentifiable rock music begins to play. The technician speaks to Peter Santos, who then speaks into the microphone.]

Peter Santos: Ladies and gentlemen, it has been brought to my attention that this match has been changed to a Tag Team Match!

Sully: What?!

JP: Now that's more like it!

Sully: What do you mean? Tempest and EniGma have only had time to prepare for one opponent, not two!

JP: Well, Hobo now has a partner, but who is it?

[As EniGma and Tempest regard the Extreme Champion, he smiles and nods. Suddenly, Tempest is taken down from behind! The man who did it then turns to EniGma and begins to hammer punches into his face, finally knocking him back into the ropes.]

JP: It's Tropical Storm!

Sully: What?!

JP: Tropical Storm is back, and he's helping The Hobo!

[The fans go wild for Tropical Storm and The Hobo, who has since dropped the Extreme Title and slid into the ring. The bell rings, and Hobo heads for the nearest corner, Tempest having also left the ring, leaving EniGma to deal with Tropical Storm. Storm picks up EniGma and raises him for a Snap Suplex, landing it expertly. EniGma writhes on the mat, holding his back, and is stomped on by TS. The latter raises his arms in celebration, and the fans go wild. Tropical Storm Then drags EniGma to his feet, before whipping him against the ropes and landing a huge Backdrop as he comes back. EniGma lands on his back and bounces back to his corner, where Tempest tags himself in. Showing unusual aggression, he runs at Tropical Storm, charging him down with a Clothesline, before running at the ropes, coming off with another Clothesline to the now standing Storm. Tropical Storm bounces on his shoulders, and rolls toward the nearest turnbuckle, grabbing the bottom rope, and trying to pull himself up. Tempest sizes him up for a second, before charging and landing a running Splash, crushing Tropical Storm against the turnbuckle. Storm leans back against the corner, managing to stay standing, but is then chopped across the chest by Tempest repeatedly. Red marks are soon visible on the chest of Tropical Storm, and he is crying out with every chop. Tempest then backs off, and runs once more. He looks for a running turnbuckle Clothesline, but Tropical Storm ducks, and quickly heads for his corner, looking for the tag to Hobo. Hobo has his hand outstretched, but Tempest runs and lands an elbow to the back of Storm's head. Storm goes down, landing on his face, and Tempest grabs his leg and brings him to his corner of the ring, quickly applying a Figure 4 Leg Lock. The referee watches Tropical Storm, and does not see EniGma climbing off the apron and grabbing Tempest's hands. Hobo begins to shout, and the referee turns to him, EniGma taking the opportunity and pulling extra hard. To increase the pressure on Tropical Storm's legs, he now puts his feet on the side of the apron and pushes, pulling Tempest further away. Storm screams in pain, and cries out even louder when EniGma pulls harder. The referee now turns around, and EniGma lets go, putting his arms in the air, his face the picture of innocence.]

JP: Look at those dastardly tactics!

Sully: Haven't you heard the song JP? That's teamwork!

JP: Well, I don't think I'm familiar with that kind of teamwork�

[Tempest lets go of the hold, and now tags in EniGma, who immediately grabs the left leg of Tropical Storm and kicks it twice. Storm cries out in pain again, as EniGma pulls him towards the ropes, propping his foot on the bottom. He then looks about at the booing fans, before jumping, and landing his knee on Storm's left shin. He does this a few times, then drags Storm away from the ropes. He points Storm so he is facing Hobo, and can very clearly see him, and then applies an Ankle Lock! Storm cries out in pain, desperately trying to fight off the hold, pulling at his own hair. He screams, trying to drag himself toward The Hobo, whose hand is outstretched as far as it will go. He is only about a foot away now, when EniGma stands up and pulls him backwards, right back into EniGma's corner.]

JP: My God! That left leg of Tropical Storm must be in agony!

Sully: He should just give up now!

JP: I wouldn't argue with that! But Tropical Storm has never been one to give up a fight! And what tactics by EniGma and Tempest, making sure that Tropical Storm can see his partner, but he cannot tag! It must be playing havoc with his head!

Sully: Tactics, JP, tactics!

[Tropical Storm, however, somehow manages to reverses, turning over and throwing EniGma into the corner, before turning back over again and heading for his corner, crawling as fast as he can with his gimped left leg. He has almost reached Hobo, who is screaming at him to make the tag, when Tempest, who has tagged himself in, lands a running Elbow Drop to his back, effectively halting his movement. Tempest now drags Tropical Storm back away from The Hobo, much to both men's frustration.]

JP: Tropical Storm really needs to make a tag right now!

Sully: I don't think he's gonna make it through the match!

[Tempest stomps viciously on the left knee of Tropical Storm, who yet again is left on the mat, holding his leg. Tempest tags in EniGma, who picks up Tropical Storm, and whips him into the turnbuckle, knocking Hobo off the apron. Tropical Storm then attempts to run forward with a Clothesline, but EniGma easily ducks, causing Tropical Storm to Clothesline the referee! The referee hits the mat hard, and stays down as Tropical Storm is tripped, and put into another Ankle Lock! He screams in pain, and does not take long before tapping out, but there is no ref!]

JP: Tropical Storm is tapping out, but there is no referee to end the match!

Sully: And whose fault is that?

JP: I hope you're not insinuating that Tropical Storm purposely attacked the referee, are you?

[Tropical Storm is tapping away, and Tempest is stomping on his back. However, suddenly, much to the delight of the fans, The Hobo slides into the ring with a chair in his hands! Tempest backs off, arms outstretched to try and reason with Hobo, and EniGma does the same, leaving Tropical Storm, who gingerly stands behind Hobo. They slowly move towards EniGma and Tempest, and Hobo raises the chair.]

JP: This is it, they're gonna get what they deserve!

Sully: Don't do it, Hobo!

[He raises the chair, and is about to hit Tempest over the head, when suddenly he spins around and smashes it down over the head of Tropical Storm!]

JP: Oh, Good God what a shot!

Sully: What the hell?!

JP: The Hobo! What's he up to?

[Hobo regards Tropical Storm for a second, before turning back to Tempest, looking furious. However, it does not last long, and a grin spreads across the face of The Hobo. He drops the chair and outstretches a hand to Tempest, who also smiles, and shakes it. Hobo then turns to EniGma, who is grinning even wider than Hobo himself. They eye each other for a second, before embracing tightly.]

Sully: I knew Hobo would see sense!

JP: The friends are back together, but this�This just makes me sick!

Sully: It's friendship, JP! They couldn't stay mad for ever!

[Tempest grabs Tropical Storm and picks him up, before hooking his head and landing the Epicentre! EniGma then grabs him, and lifts him up onto his shoulders, then drops him, grabbing his head and hitting the Bolt From The Blue! Finally, Hobo, who has climbed the turnbuckle, jumps and lands the Spare Change Splash! Tempest pins, and EniGma rouses the referee, who counts, 1�2�3! Tempest quickly limbs off Storm and reaches for Hobo's hand, raising it into the air, along with EniGma, who raises the other. 'Heart's Filthy Lesson' hits, and the three stand in the middle of the ring over the limp body of Tropical Storm, Hobo spitting on his face.]

Peter Santos: And your winners, through pinfall, Tempest and Enigma!

JP: What a sickening display by these three, they disgust me! And to think that Hobo is our Extreme Champion!

Sully: He's a great Champion, JP!

JP: Well, I debate that�Anyway, it's time for a commercial, folks, we'll see you after the break�

--- Commercial Break ---

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