"Paddy Punch" The Hobo

versus

"Stud INC" Stud w/Stud INC Phillies

'Hobo Chooses Rules' MWF Xtreme Championship No.1 Contender Match

Referee: Charles Galliant

Writer: Jon Beavers

JP: Coming up next is the MWF Xtreme Championship No.1 Contendership Match... It's Hobo Rules, so who knows what everybody's favourite son-of-a-bum
has got in mind for Stud tonight!

Sully: Looks like we're about to find out though, as you can see, being delivered on the stage there is a dumpster, John!! If indeed this is a Dumpster match, the object is to close the lid with your opponent inside! Paramedics are standing by below the staging area.

JP: This is the match I have been looking forward to all night.. Let's go to the ring with Peter who is standing by to announce the participants in the match.

[Before Santos announces the wrestlers to the match, we switch over to the backstage area with Stud Inc.]

Stud: Alright, listen, I don't want any of you to accompany me to the ring tonight.

Mona: What?! Why?

Stud: I want to win this on my own. Win or lose, so be it, but I want to do this on my own.

Rochelle: Okay, I respect your decision.

Amythest: Be careful, baby.

Stud: You know I will.. You know I will ..

[We go back to the ring with Peter Santos in the ring.]

Peter Santos: The following contest is by decision of MWF Superstar Hobo, a Dumpster Match! The object to this is to throw your opponent in the dumpster, and close the lid to win. First, from Detroit, Michigan...

["ONE OF A CAN..."The crowd goes nuts as hobo comes out, drowning out Santos' final words as Paddy Punch grabs the dumpster, and begins to push it down the ramp, towards the ring. He then walks up the steel steps and steps through the ropes. Going over to the turnbuckle and jumping on the second turnbuckle, and the crowd responds favourably.]

Peter Santos: Next, from San Antonio, Texas, Stud!!

["Exploder" by Audioslave begins to blare over of the speakers, signalling the arrival of Stud. A single white light spotlights the top of the ramp and he steps out onto it, to an ovation, as the crowd is slowly getting behind the newcomer. He makes his way down as the ramp as the music plays, reaches to the ring, climbs inside, and the two men smile at each other and nod...]

JP: Let this match get started!

[The bell rings as the two men lock up.. The fans go nuts, as Hobo wrenches on a headlock. Stud pushes him towards the ropes, but Hobo grabs his wrist,  reversing, and whips Stud into the ropes and catches him with an arm drag. The fans cheer.]

Sully: Well, THAT was about the highlight of the match..

JP: Sully!!

Sully: Well, I bet it is....

[Stud rolls up to his feet, still smiling, and extends his hand, the two men shake, both still smiling. They lock up, and Hobo, again with a headlock.. Stud hoists him up into the air, and Hobo comes crashing down with a backdrop, the fans "ooooh", and both men get back to their feet. Stud runs from his side of the ring, and hits Hobo with a clothesline that propels both men out of the ring.. After both men stagger to their feet, Stud picks up the Hobo and throws several right hands, Hobo covers up, and slowly backs up the steel ramp. He waits foe the right moment then kicks Stud in the gut and DDTs him on the steel ramp, and the crowd cheers again..]

JP: DDT on the steel ramp! Stud has to be out cold.

Sully: At least it's not anything Hobo could have hurt.

[Hobo picks up Stud and then snap suplexes him on the steel ramp. He arches his back, yelling in pain.]

JP: What action! A Snap suplex, by the Hobo on to the steel ramp. The two men are about a third of the way up the ramp Stud in trouble early!

Sully: Rookies!

JP: That was a good move, for the Hobo wasn't it, Sully?

Sully: I've seen better.

[Hobo gets to his feet, while nearby, Stud is holding his back. Hobo slowly walks over to Stud. He picks him up and sets him over his shoulder, walking down the ramp. He drills him, head first, into the side of the Dumpster, splitting his head. Hobo is no sadist though, and rolls into the ring to the cheering of the audience, as Stud is on his hands and knees, trying to wipe the blood away, and get back into the game.]

JP: Eyebrow split on the dumpster! I don't think Studs' head was expecting to take that much punishment. And I'm surprised that this kid is still walking.

Sully: Actually, John, he isn't doing much walking, he's getting his ass kicked.

JP: Sully!!

[Stud rolls into the ring, forehead all busted open and bleeding all over the mat.]

JP: Stud is busted open! He's bleeding everywhere!

[But he comes back, impressing the fans, with integrity, locking with Hobo, and getting in a few big Forearms to the back, softening him up just enough to muster a release German suplex. Hobo is slow to get up, and Stud uses the time to keep the blood from getting into his eyes.. Hobo is up, and once again, the two men lock up, but Hobo whips Stud into the turnbuckles. He then walks over, and tries to roll Stud over the top rope and into the Dumpster below.]

JP: Both men in adequate form tonight. Neither man wanting to end up in that dumpster!

Sully: What's a guy to do? It probably smells.. My guess is ALMOST as bad as the Hobo.

JP: Sully!

[Stud fights back, and the Hobo now finds himself backed into a set of turnbuckles, with authority. Stud follows up with a chop..]

Crowd: Whoo!!

[Another..]

Crowd: Whoo!!

[Another..]

Crowd: Whoo!!

[Another..]

Crowd: Whoo!!

[Hobo falls to his rump with the last one, the crowd is pretty hyped as both men are looking stellar, and really putting on a show. Stud picks Hobo up, and carries him over to the Dumpster, and slams him on to the thick plastic lid. It wants to buckle from the impact, but holds. Hobo rolls off the lid, and directly back into the bottom of the ring. It's at this moment..]

JP: Folks, we're being joined at the announce booth by MWF Superstar Exodus

Sully: Yeah man, thanks for stopping by, it's about time I had SOMEONE to talk to.

[Exodus doesn't say anything though, but instead just watches intently, as Stud and Hobo are battling. They like Stud, and cheer for him, but Hobo is an MWF Staple, and his response is enormous. The two men trade blows, trade moves, trade reversals, and the crowd reacts with a roar that transcends the evening. Until...]

JP: Hobo Cutter! Hobo Cutter!

Sully: It's about time.

JP: I figured you'd say that.

Sully: You know me all too well, John.

JP: I think you need a vacation.

[The Hobo rolls out of the ring, walks over to the dumpster, and flips the lid open, then rolling back into the ring, and grasping Stud, bringing him to his feet. A lot of time was wasted though, and Stud again fires back, catching Hobo with to the right side, He's lifted on to the right shoulder, swung around to the left side into a Sidewalk Slam.]

JP: The Foundation Check!!

Sully: Oh Jesus, what is going on here tonight, this match should of been over twenty minutes ago..

JP: You got somewhere to be, do you?

Sully: Actually, The Red Lion just off the strip, near the Airport, Ladies, you'll know my room, it's the same one I Always get..

JP: I'm starting to think that I'm the one that needs the vacation.

[Both men are down, bruised, beaten, battered, and in Studs case, bloody. Exodus is shown, looking intent and angry, a foreshadow of things yet to come this night. Stud staggers to his feet, looking triumphant, and walks over to Hobo. He points to the dumpster, and grabs the Hobo to his feet. Outside, at the booth, Exodus has sprung to his feet, and folded his chair, he's not acting, but you can tell it's coming. For which wrestler, you may not be sure, but the tension is surely mounting. Stud sees this, and says something to him, then grabs Hobo, taking him over to the ropes, to empty him into the Dumpster, but Hobo fights back. However neither man was prepared for what happens next. WHACK! WANG!]

JP: What sickening chair shots! Exodus, What are you doing?

Sully: Finally, putting some end to my misery..

[The first shot took Hobo down. and the Second one drops Stud like... Well... Hard, Re-opening the wound on his head. The fans boo Exodus, who drops the  chair and picks up Stud. He gives him the West-Side Driver and he begins to exit the ring, kicking the rising Hobo over as he exits He walks up the ramp, and gives the fans a "West-Side" signal, before heading into the back.]

JP: Now what the Hell? That was a perfectly matched main event.

Sully: Are you kidding me? Exodus has been promised a match for over a month now, and I guess he just got tired of waiting for Management to get off their asses. Besides, the match ain't over, until someone goes diving, if anything, Exodus just sped up the process.

JP: Stud definitely got the worst of that attack

Sully: Yeah, well, Exodus saw a temp get a main event match, what would you do?

[Hobo gets to his feet, looking around, he is genuinely upset at the turn of events, however, he also knows that a win is a win, and he carefully rolls Stud to the mat edge, and into the dumpster filled with Styrofoam peanuts. He hits bottom.]

Sully: Heat that John? Stud just made a Thud!!

JP: Sully!!

[He rolls out of the ring, takes the lid to the dumpster and closes it. The bell rings. And Peter Santos announces the winner.]

Peter Santos: The winner of the Hobo's Choice Dumpster Match is The Hobo!

["One of a can" plays as the fans cheer for Paddy as he walks towards the back, heaving, and hands on his sides in disbelief. The look on his face is definite disgust. He returns down the ramp to the dumpster. The fans are going crazy. In the biggest showing of sportsmanship shown all year on MWF television, The Hobo helps Stud out of the dumpster, with arm around his neck, helps the youngster to the back, prompting the arena to literally explode with the biggest ovation in Hobos historical career.

Sully: ZZZZ.. Ungh.. Wha? Huh? I miss something?

JP: Folks, we're out of time, tune in next week to see the fallout of this weeks main event, We'll be with you for some announcements regarding MWF Nightmare!!

Sully: That reminds me, I was having a nightmare... You see, John, There was a match between Hobo and some rookie, involving a Dumpster, and...

JP: Oh shut up...

The MWF is the Maximum Wrestling Federation, copyright to Edward Walker and John Richardson 2004.

Additional matches by Jon Beavers, Paddy Stoate and Dom Stoate.

Additional segments by Paddy Stoate and Jason Williams.