Disclaimer: I don't own any Gundam stuff in any way, shape or form

Warnings: 1+2 ,OOC, yaoi ,yuri (mentioned), language

*** = scene change/and or time change

Self-Help

Relena shook her head and threw her hairbrush across the room angrily.
Heero merely stepped aside and let it clatter to the floor. "Heero, I don't
know how many times I've told you I'm not after you anymore. I told you..
you don't have to stick around! Dorothy takes very good care of me, and I
don't really need a bodyguard anymore! Don't you have somewhere else to go?"
Relena ranted, frustrated tears in her eyes. "Quatre has invited you to come
work for him, will you go?"
Nodding without emotion, Heero stopped eximaning his gun and quickly
left the room. Walking down the hall, he made a mental inventory of all he
would take with him. Clothes.. weapons.. the few odds and ends he had picked
up... and the necklace Duo had given him. Looking down at his chest, his
lips twitched slightly as he pondered the silver cross that hung there. It
served no purpose.. yet he couldn't make himself get rid of it. Hn.
Entering "his" room, he packed quickly, trying to take as little time as
possible. If Quatre wanted him for a job, there was no time to waste. Maybe
this new job would make him feel useful again.. or just make him feel
something. Shrugging the bags over his shoulders, he left without a
backwards glance.

***
Leaving the transport, he carefully walked up the marble steps to the
office building Quatre was currently using as his headquarters. Heero
frowned slightly at the pastel decor, and ignored the friendly smiles of
several of the women behind the desk. Pulling the paperwork out of his small
leather briefcase, he handed them silently to one of the secretaries. She
took them without comment and called up to Quatre, letting him know that his
new employee was here to see him.

"Please! send him right up!" Quatre's cheerful voice sounded over the
intercom.

Walking towards the elevator, he automatically pressed the button for
Quatre's floor. Turning to stand towards the back of the conveyance, he felt
an electric tingle as he looked at the person to his right. Black clothes
draped loosely over a well muscled frame as a long braid seemed to move on
it's own, twitching and moving at the slight vibrations from the floor.
Clutching the crucifix in his hand, he almost said something, but
stopped when the elevator came to a halt, watching with a strange expression
as the man he had been observing walked out, nearly bouncing down the hall
with energy. Shaking his head, he finally came to Quatre's office, and was
ushered in by a familiar face.

"I thought you'd be here." Heero said, looking Trowa over carefully.
Trowa had the same look he had always had, save for the smile that hovered
around his lips. When Quatre spotted them, he ran towards him and engulfed
him in a hug. Shocked, Heero half lifted his arms, not sure what to do.

"I didn't think you'd make it! I'm glad you could! We need a lot of help
with the computer systems you know.. seems like someone is always hacking
into them." Almost babbling, Quatre watched Heero carefully, noting the same
lack of emotion that his friend had possessed during the war. Something had
to be done. Motioning to Trowa subtly, he expressed his concerns with a
poignant look. Ever an observant one, Trowa went to get something off of a
shelf while Quatre went over what he needed Heero to do.

"Hn. Mission accepted." Heero stated, picking up the paperwork and
placing it carefully into his briefcase. "I will report tomorrow at 08:00
hours." Turning to leave, he felt a strong hand decend on his shoulder.
Trowa looked carefully into Heero's eyes, making sure he had the blue-eyed
one's complete attention.
"Here, I think you can use these. They helped me a lot." Handing Heero a
small black case, he released his grip, allowing Heero to turn and leave.

***
Unlocking the door to his new apartment, he sighed in relief. Quatre's
obsession for pastels had been left out when he had chosen Heero's new
abode. Neatly putting up his few belongings, he explored the area, looking
at all the effort that had been put into it. Clean lines were accentuated
only by a few tasteful decorations. A set of swords adorned one wall.. a
collection of guns stood in a rack by the fireplace. The bare wood of the
floor even felt right somehow. Walking to the kitchen, he discovered a full
stock of food was already in place.
Heero almost smiled as he explored the bedroom. It had obviously had
been designed for more than one occupant. The king size bed dominated the
room, though there was space left over for two dressers and accessories.
Shaking his head, he sat on the matress, almost wishing he had someone to
share it with. Setting the last of his bags beside him, he suddenly pulled
out the black case Trowa had handed him. Opening it carefully, he found a
selection of CDs. Looking at the title carefully, he found they were all
labeled "Self Help" Hn. Well, Trowa had suggested it, and of all the Gundam
pilots, Trowa had been most like him in temperment. Popping open the
cd-changer that occupied a wooden shelf, he put in all five of the cds and
hit the play button.
Laying down on the bed, he crossed his arms behind his head and listened
half-heartedly to the sound of waves and seagulls that filled the air.
Well.. it was peaceful.. if monotous. Lulled almost into sleep, he hardly
payed attention as soft words started to work their way into the music. "You
have many emotions, though they may be deeply hidden. There is something
inside of you that you love, and you need to let that love out.." Played
softly into Heero's dozing ear. Finally falling completely asleep, he left
the music on to whisper to him all night.

***

"Here's your desk and computer. You have one of the newest machines in
the building, and if you need anything for it, just write up a request and
submit it to the finance department." Smiling professionally, she backed out
of the spacious cubicle. "If you need anything else, the head of computer
security has the space next to yours. He should be in within an hour."
Nodding absently, Heero carefully powered up his computer. He could get
a good layout of the system before his superior got in to give him his
mission. Absorbed in his work, he stopped only when blaring loud music shot
through the thin walls to break his concentration. Scowling, he stood and
went over to meet his supervisor. Knocking on the wall, he stared as the
black-clad form bent over to drop his bag to the floor.

"Yeah yeah, I know.. I'll turn it down in a minute. I had to do
something to stay awake last night! You wouldn't believe the holes I found
in the new software they sent us!" Turning around, Duo stared at Heero in
suprise. "Man, I should have known you'd be the specialist they hired! It's
great to see you!" Pulling Heero into a hug, he thumped him on the back
soundly before returning his attention to putting his stuff away. "I'm sure
as hell glad you're here. I've been doing most of the work around here by
myself."
Feeling a strange sensation in his stomach, Heero stared at the annoying
baka.. who somehow didn't seem that annoying anymore. "I took a look at the
software that is on the system.. and I saw some definate security breaches."
Walking over to Duo's computer, he pointed out several design flaws.
Watching Duo out of the cornor of his eye, he suddenly felt weak.. almost
dizzy.
"Ok, go ahead." Duo nodded, grinning. "This is what we get paid for, get
in there and have at it!" Finally turning down his music, he settled into
his chair, turning his full attention to his work.
Returning to his desk, Heero started working, concentrating while
half-listening to Duo's music.. It really wasn't all that bad.

***
Stepping out of the elevator, Heero returned to his apartment. Leaning
against the wall, he unlocked the door, stopping to stare as he saw Duo
walking down the hall. "Do you need something?" Heero asked him as he drew
near.
"Yeah, about eight hours of sleep." Duo said with a yawn. "I can't
believe how much progress we made today. Lucky thing there are always people
too curious for their own good, or we'd be out of a job in a week." Walking
over to the door next to Heero's, he fumbled a key into the lock. "I'm beat,
but I'm still hungry, want something to eat?"
Heero suprised himself by nodding agreement and following Duo into his
apartment. Looking around at the comfortable clutter, Heero almost smiled.
Some things never change. "Want help?" He asked, working to clear off the
stack of magazines that littered the table.
"Nah, I got it." Duo answered with a smile, pulling a pan out from under
the stove. "So, what happened to your job guarding Relena?"
"Dorothy." Heero said, stacking more papers over on the coffee table.
"They decided to make an item of it, and Dorothy is the jealous type.
Besides, there was no reason to stay." Helping Duo set out the dishes, he
wondered at himself. Just why was he being so open?
"Oh well, Her loss." Duo smirked with a strange gleam in his eyes. "I'm
certianly glad to have you back!"

***
Taking the extra food Duo had pressed on him back to his apartment,
Heero put it in the fridge for breakfast, and sat down to think. He felt
odd... Getting up and looking in the mirror, he stared at his reflection, he
saw something different. The hard, cold planes of his face seemed less
defined.. more relaxed. Something that was almost a smile hovered around his
lips. And his eyes....... seemed to show something was different. No longer
icy, they stared back at him with a sparkle? Yes... sparkle. Hmm. Walking
into the bedroom, he sank into the matress, trying to make sense of what was
happening.
After about an hour, he still had no clue what was going on. Rolling
over, he felt something hard dig into his side.. oh.. it was the cd case.
Blinking, he bolted up, staring in wonder at the black plastic. Could it be?
With possibly his first real smile, Heero got up and turned on the CD
player.

***

When Duo made it in to work the next morning, he was greeted by several
suprises. First, the "wall" between Heero's desk and his own had been
removed. Second, their desks had been pushed closer together, within easy
speaking distance. Third, Heero was already there, listening to his radio
with every semblance of enjoyment. "Hey Heero, are you feeling ok?"
Snorting, Heero smiled. "Baka." He said fondly, while still moving
slightly in time to the beat. Looking at Duo, he couldn't help but wonder if
this was the feeling he'd been missing all this time. Remembering a few of
the words that his subconsious had been absorbing while asleep, he thought
he was beginning to understand. "This will make it much easier to work
together on these problems. We're used to working as a team after all."
Duo nodded, shocked at the smile on Heero's face. That smile transformed
Heero from being drop-dead gorgeous to irresistable. Pulling his chair
closer, he took a few moments just to stare. "Hey Heero... would you like to
go out for dinner tonight?" Biting his lip, he waited for his friend's fist
to hit his face.
"Sure... but there is one condition." Heero said in a serious voice.
"What?"
"You have to help me decorate my apartment."

***
Dinner had gone better than Heero had ever dreamed of... he felt so
alive.. so open.. so ... happy. Laughing inwardly at himself, he followed
Duo up the stairs to his apartment. As he opened the door, he felt the other
man put his hand on his shoulder. It felt right. As Duo laughed at the bare
interior, he watched, mesmorized as the energitic figure started jokingly
taking measurements around the room, writing on an imaginary pad.
"Ah, this is terrible! It all must go!" he snickered, holding his sides.
"It's just way too... you!" Duo walked over to the far wall with a serious
look in his eyes that belied his laughing. "And here.. we need a doorway!
This wall just looks to empty without one!"
"Hn." grabbing Duo, he dragged him away from the wall. "Come on, you
still have to decide what to do with the bedroom." Heero almost grinned
evilly as he enjoyed the look of shock on his friend's face. Oh yes... this
was definately what he was missing. Pulling him over to the bed, he grabbed
a stub of pencil and a notebook, handing them over.
Looking around the room carefully, Duo set the pencil and paper next to
him. "This needs nothing." With an attempt at a carefree grin, he ran his
fingers over the velvety covers. "It's perfect just as it is... Why Quatre
made you a little love-nest." Joking, he laughed again, obviously thinking
Heero couldn't see the hidden hunger in his eyes. "So........ what do you
have in the way of music?" Duo walked over and pressed the play button. As
the sound of waves filled the room, Duo picked up the black case in
disbelief. "Self-Help??"
Heero smiled lazily and deliberately pulled off his shirt. "Yeah, you're
supposed to help yourself." Walking over, he pulled Duo over to the bed.
"You know something, I really do need to help myself." Wrapping his arms
around the gorgeous one, Heero brought his lips to Duo's in a burning kiss.
When they finally had to stop to breathe, he pulled off Duo's clothes
roughly, showering the exposed flesh with kisses. Duo's moans filled the
room, almost drowning out the soft sounds of surf washing against a distant
shore.

***

Heero walked into Quatre's office on Monday with a large, satisfied
smile and a band of gold encircling his finger. "Hey Trowa.. thanks for the
CDs. I think everyone can use that kind of help." Smiling happily, he handed
the black case over and headed towards work.
"Hey Love, which CDs did you give him?" Quatre asked, curiosity burning
in his eyes.
Trowa contrived to look innocent as he put the case back onto the shelf.
"Just the ones I listened to after the war.. when we first started going
out." Smiling, he thought of the labels he had removed from the CDs: "How to
be the Perfect Lover"
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