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| UNSUITABLE FOR CHILDREN | |||||||||||||||||||||||
| By Matthew Craig. | |||||||||||||||||||||||
| True Story: | |||||||||||||||||||||||
| I was in the library yesterday, looking for graphic novels (or big comic books, for the uninitiated: I read comics, and so should you), as well as the Hunter S. Thompson books. Saw a reasonable selection of the usual sorts of books: Batman, Spider-Man, Maus, Sandman, that sort of thing. I picked up a Batman book, and saw that it had "Unsuitable for Children" stamped on the front. Put it down. Looked at a Spider-Man book. Same deal. Looked at a Star Wars book. Same a-frigging-gain. | |||||||||||||||||||||||
| Spider-Man! Unsuitable for Children! (Watch Spidey on Fox Kids this Fall!) | |||||||||||||||||||||||
| Batman: the Animated Series! Unsuitable for Children! (Batman is on every day on Cartoon Network; his cartoons are on sale, certificate PG or U in Toys R Us) | |||||||||||||||||||||||
| Suitably incensed (enough to talk to myself like a loon in the Public Library: the Sainted father hidden behind the Exchange and Mart), I grabbed the nearest librarian. Okay, so I picked the cute one. I was angry, but not that angry. Ahem. | |||||||||||||||||||||||
| She told me that the Children's librarian (!!!!) was in charge of these sorts of things. The children's librarian, God look you. The idea was, some of the books contained scenes of violence that might be unsuitable for under-thirteens. Granted, this might well be the case, if the kids were suitably sensitive. But then, the librarian said that the kids could still take the books out IF the parents vetoed them, first. | |||||||||||||||||||||||
| Now. Let's all say this together: | |||||||||||||||||||||||
| Is a parent going to get a book out for their kid that says "Unsuitable for Children" on it? | |||||||||||||||||||||||
| Maybe if they trust their kid, or reeeeeally look at it. But, on reflection, perhaps not. The parent, presumably in a hurry, will just tell the kid to put the book back, or grab it without looking and head straight for the exit. | |||||||||||||||||||||||
| Now, some of these books already have age guidance on them: The Vertigo (DC Comics more experimental arm) ones, for instance, say "Suggested for Mature Readers" on 'em. | |||||||||||||||||||||||
| Now _that_ sounds like less of a loaded phrase to me. And it's on books that really aren't for all ages, or at the very least, for all levels of maturity. Maus, for instance, which is the story of Polish Jews during the Holocaust (but is drawn in a largely cartoony style), may not be the best thing for your eight year-old boy to read if he's a Disney fan. But your older kid might want to read it for History class, or take it to show her English teacher. | |||||||||||||||||||||||
| The librarian tried to assure me that I wasn't a kid for reading the books. If she hadn't been disarmingly cute, and I'd had time to get my dander up, I'd have been insulted. Of course I'm not a kid: I'm 26, damnit. But the stereotype was there, in her mind. And it was there in the minds of the librarians, who decided to fob the funny picture books off on the kiddies book-lady, because, well, they must be kiddies books, mustn't they? | |||||||||||||||||||||||
| So why did she stamp 'em as unsuitable? | |||||||||||||||||||||||
| Instead of being firm and assertive with this woman (wouldn't have helped: I'd'a just patroinised her: I get that way when I'm evangelical about something), I muttered something about being a thirty-year old kid and needing a new audience to see these comics so that I could keep reading them. Which is true: kids arent reading comics anymore, at least not these sorts of comics: they just can't get them (which is another rant). A lot of kids just aren't reading at all. | |||||||||||||||||||||||
| Now, comics aren't an easy way out, despite what you might think. They're as sophisticated and versatile as any artform, but they're apparent (and frequently non-existent) simplicity could form a great bridge between illiteracy and literacy for a lot of today's video game generation. Hell, I'm living proof of the power of comics. But that's another story. | |||||||||||||||||||||||
| Back to the cute librarian: my argument shot to pieces, we parted ways. I think it was the "thirty year-old kid" line. She was a little insulted. | |||||||||||||||||||||||
| I'm gonna die a virgin. | |||||||||||||||||||||||
| That aside, I figure I oughtta speak to this (disgust) childrens librarian (/disgust). Why the fuck is the kiddies librarian handling these books and labelling them ALL (ALL) as unsuitable for her particular clientele? Why is Spider-Man unsuitable for children on the grounds of violence, and Pokemon, which is about animal abuse of the highest order (badger baiting with pretty lights - eee) rammed down the little tyke's God. Danm. Throats. These little tykes that their danm parents then dress up in army fatigues. | |||||||||||||||||||||||
| Whether you like these four-colour muscle men or not, surely to God they have more to offer the kids than these commitee-made, badly animated, day-glo abominations. There CAN'T be any obstacles between the kids and the hero-books, or for that matter books about pirates, war, romance, history or practically anything that comics can show us. Otherwise there's no point having comics about anything other than mischevious cartoon ducks. Pantless bastards that they are. | |||||||||||||||||||||||
| For that matter, why is the childrens librarian handling the graphic fiction in the first place? Especially if the scope of these books is outside her target demographic, as it often is? Why isn't she stacking or sorting these books in more appropriate places. Maus, which we discussed earliuer, would be just as well-served being racked alongside Anne Frank's diaries, or World War Two books. The Star Wars books would fit nicely in the Science Fiction or Film sections. Then you could put the Batman books in the Children or Young Adult sections of the library, with no danger of kids seeing inappropriate material. | |||||||||||||||||||||||
| It'll piss me off: I love comics enough to be glad that I don't have to frig around looking all over the library for them. But, you know: if it meant more people read more comics, I'd be willing to put up with the inconvienience. Hell, it'd be better than putting the books in some badly put-together spinner-rack. | |||||||||||||||||||||||
| And if the library has to label these books (and I notice they don't do this to the videos or the text-only books), then they could at least put a bit more thought into how they label them. Try using less loaded language, or copying the video system of U, PG and 15 ratings. That way, everybody gets a fair crack at the whip, not just the experts. Like me. | |||||||||||||||||||||||
| Otherwise, what's the point. Leave the kids to their empty, wordless, Pokemon-filled lives, or whatever replaces them, and by the end of this century, comics will be as relevant as the hundred-year old kids that are still reading them, up in the nursing home. | |||||||||||||||||||||||
| Matthew Craig, 4th July, Independent | |||||||||||||||||||||||
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