Comic Shop Romance (C) M.P. Craig 2001.
Names have been changed to protect the painfully shy.
COMIC SHOP ROMANCE
2nd Draft
Matthew Craig
5th September 2001
Page One.
PANEL ONE
Establishing shot. Mid-afternoon. A long street, with brickwork paving, lined with shops. The buildings are mostly two storeys, with shops on the ground floor, and flats above them. The shops are a mixture of bakeries, charity shops, small electrical outlets and clothes stores.
All except for one.
Halfway along the row of shops, between a shoe shop and a pawnbrokers, we see the premises of I. REED COMICS. The shop front is small, compared to the larger bakery and electrical store, with one large window on the left of shot, and an open door on the right. In the window, we can see videos, books, action figures and a poster for an upcoming movie: RIPCORD MESSIAH. The poster, incidentally, is jet black (but shiny, because it's a poster).
Shopfront logo.
Poster for the "Ripcord Messiah" movie and graphic novel.
PANEL TWO
In the shop now. Shot as if standing in the doorway, looking in. The till is just inside the door, partially hidden by a tall cardboard cutout (of a casually dressed white man with close-cut brown hair in his thirties, lighting a cigarette: this character is called MOIR; pronounced "Myurr") and is on top of a glass counter. We can't see it yet, but there are watches, badges and assorted expensive trinkets under the counter. Along the left-hand wall, we can see action figures, models and videos. Along the back wall, we see (L-R) books and the Staff Only Door (labeled as such). On the right-hand wall, we see shelves of comics and magazines, and bookshelves filled with graphic novels and trade paperbacks.
There are more of these on a table in the middle of the floor, set in a display that bears the legends "COMING SOON" and "LOCAL AUTHOR." One stack is of books titled "RIPCORD MESSIAH," all with lovely shiny black covers (resembling the movie poster). The other book is called "MOIR," and has a cover design we probably can't make out from this distance, but is reminiscent of the door of a Sam Spade-style private investigator's office.
Cover of the "Moir" graphic novel.
Click to enlarge...
There are a few shoppers: two young boys, rifling through the action figures, presumably for a Fat Jim Morrison figure. One patron is nervously eyeing the adult-erotic comics on the top shelf of the comics section. The last shopper is a tall GOTH-type, probably buying a load of Sailor Moon books to enjoy with his girlfriend. He has a big bag of comics and the like, and is forking over a credit card to an off-panel assistant, hidden behind the till and the cardboard MOIR.
PANEL THREE
The Goth, weighed down by his purchases, accidentally knocks shoulders with a shorter man, MATT, as he exits through the door of the shop. He makes to apologize, but MATT (who we see from behind, dressed in a long black wool coat), waves him on.
1. GOTH: WHOOPS! SORRY.
2. MATT: HEY. NO WORRIES.
PANEL FOUR
MATT, who we still see from behind, moves to the counter, rubbing his shoulder. All we can see is that he is white, with dark red hair. We can now see the concealed assistant from PANEL TWO. She is of average height (about the same height as MATT), white, in her early twenties, with long, brown hair and soft blue eyes. She's quite pretty, and has a straight nose and full lips (in a friendly smile in this panel). She's wearing (incidentally) a navy blue vest top, blue jeans and Doctor Marten boots. And, as if you needed any more information, she's called TESS.
3. TESS: HI!
4. MATT: YEAH, HI. I HAVE A STANDING ORDER FOR COMICS HERE. IS IT TOO EARLY TO PICK IT UP?
5. TESS: NO, NO. WE'VE JUST FINISHED UNPACKING THE BOX.
6. TESS: WHAT'S THE NAME, PLEASE?
Page Two.
Splash Page.
Reverse angle of the shot in Page One, PANEL TWO. Inside the shop, looking at the till from the other side. Full-length shot of MATT and TESS, separated by the counter, framed so all we can see are the customer and the assistant, and the counter. Behind TESS, on the wall, are two three-drawer filing cabinets.
MATT is smiling warmly. TESS is still smiling, too, and is leaning just a little bit on the counter top with both hands.
It's not an earth-shatteringly romantic moment, or love at first sight for both of them, but MATT has met somebody special, even if he's concealing it well.
MATT wears a long black wool coat, almost like a sailor might wear. He's also in his mid-twenties, average-looking with sideburns to just above the line of his chin, which bears two days stubble. Under the coat, we can just see a plain green t-shirt with a v-neck. He's wearing slightly baggy blue-jeans, because he's a little overweight, and scuffed black shoes, the sort of cheap lace-ups a school teacher might wear.
We can't see it yet, but on the top of his right hand, in the centre, he bears a half-inch scar.
1. MATT: IT'S MATT.
2. MATT: MATTHEW CRAIG.
3. MATT: C-R-A-I-G.
4. CAPTION (bottom right of the panel): I HAVE TWO RULES WHEN IT COMES TO COMICS: NEVER SPEND MORE THAN I CAN AFFORD, AND NEVER GO TO THE SHOP MORE THAN ONCE A WEEK.
5. CAPTION (under the first one): HAVING AN OVERDRAFT THAT WOULD CRIPPLE MOST DEVELOPING COUNTRIES ALREADY, I THINK I'M ABOUT TO START BREAKING RULE NUMBER TWO.
TITLE: COMIC SHOP ROMANCE
CREDITS: MATTHEW CRAIG - WRITER.
CAPTION (under CREDITS): THIS STORY IS TRUE, EXCEPT FOR THE BITS THAT I'VE MADE UP - THE AUTHOR.
Page Three.
PANEL ONE
MATT'S POV, as TESS moves to her left (camera right, natch), and puls open the filing cabinet. Make it the top drawer.
1. CAPTION: IT'S FUNNY. BUT NOW THAT I COME TO THINK ABOUT IT, I CAN'T REMEMBER HOW SHE SMELLED.
PANEL TWO
MATT looks to his left. The nervous customer from Page One, PANEL TWO, has plucked up the courage to pick one of the adult-erotic comics off the top shelf, and is sweating profusely as he casts his eye over the cover (which we can't see, but probably features a naked girl with unfeasible breasts, and a title like "SILK WYRM").
2. CAPTION: THIS, FOR ME, IS UNUSUAL.
PANEL THREE
Closer shot on TESS. As he stands on her tiptoes to reach into the cabinet for MATT'S comics, we can see her bosom in profile. Which is nice. Don't make it gratuitous. She has breasts. MATT is trying not to look at them, so centre the shot on her...shoulder. That'll fool 'em.
3. CAPTION: I CAN REMEMBER ALL THE CLOTHES SHE WORE WHEN I CAME TO THE - -
4. TESS: "CRAIG," WAS IT?
PANEL FOUR
MATT is roused from his reverie. Raised eyebrows (in a wide-eyed, Stan Laurel-style) indicate that his thoughts, and indeed his gaze, had been elsewhere. TESS looks up from the cabinet.
5. MATT: YEP. MATTHEW CRAIG.
6. TESS: OKAY.
PANEL FIVE
TESS pulls out a handful of comics, and lays them out in front of MATT, who studies them carefully.
7. MATT: I'M JUST GOING TO HAVE A LOOK ON THE SHELVES. IS THAT OKAY?
8. TESS: SURE. GO AHEAD.
PANEL SIX
Long panel, across the bottom of the page. The nervous nudey-book buyer makes to pay for his selections. TESS rings them up on the till, while MATT studies both her and the comics in front of him.
9. CAPTION: I CAN REMEMBER EVERYTHING ELSE ABOUT HER, THOUGH, EVEN IF HER SCENT ELUDES ME.
10. CAPTION: NOT THAT I GO AROUND SNIFFING WOMEN, YOU UNDERSTAND.
Page Four.
NOTE: CAPTIONS should go at the bottom of the panel on this page: I'm going for a running commentary effect.
PANEL ONE
MATT'S POV again, looking down towards the door. A step or three back from the shot on Page Two. The nervous buyer is leaving the shop, his bag of illicit goodies tucked under his arm. TESS is looking over at the two boys, who have worked their way to the back of the action figures, and appear to be waist-deep in Variant Edition Lorraine Kelly figures (with the plunging neckline and Karate Chop Action).
1. CAPTION: WITH TESS, IT WAS THE OTHER THINGS THAT I FELL FOR, THE INSTANT I MET HER.
PANEL TWO
Close shot on TESS now, scrutinising the fingernails on her left hand.
2. CAPTION: THE OBVIOUS THINGS, AS WELL AS THE MORE SUBTLE DETAILS.
PANEL THREE
MATT places two comics on the counter next to the small pile already there. TESS looks up and smiles, while MATT nervously looks down at the comics and smiles.
3. TESS: IS THAT IT?
4. MATT: UH-HUH.
5. CAPTION: LIKE HER HAIR, OR THOSE LIPS...
PANEL FOUR
TESS punches numbers into the till, while MATT bends over a little to write out a cheque in a ratty old chequebook he pulls from his pocket.
6. TESS: THAT'S JUST TWELVE POUNDS EXACTLY, PLEASE.
7. MATT (sotto voce): JUST?!
8. CAPTION: THOSE EYES, BLUE AND VULNERABLE...
PANEL FIVE
MATT hands the cheque over to TESS. Their eyes meet as the cheque passes between them.
9. MATT: PAYABLE TO "I. REED COMICS," RIGHT?
10. TESS: YEP.
11. CAPTION: OR THAT WORLD-CLASS ASS.
PANEL SIX
MATT smiles warmly at TESS as he makes to leave, large bag of comics in hand. As she comes around the counter to chivvy away the action figure urchins, she returns the smile.
12. MATT: WELL, I'LL SEE YA NEXT WEEK.
13. TESS: OKAY. 'BYE.
14. CAPTION: BUT THE THING I REMEMBER MOST VIVIDLY ABOUT THAT FIRST MEETING...
Page Five.
PANEL ONE
MATT, walking slowly down the street away from the store, reading a comic from the bag (he supports the comic in his left hand, while flicking through the pages with his right thumb: no bending the pages back).
1. CAPTION: ...THE THING THAT STOLE MY HEART THAT DAY, AND KEPT ME COMING BACK, EVERY THURSDAY FOR OVER TWO YEARS...
PANEL TWO
MATT stops suddenly, in the middle of the street, as if he's realized something important.
2. MATT: HANG ON...
PANEL THREE
MATT rifles though the bag, counting under his breath.
3. MATT: I WAS RIGHT...
PANEL FOUR
MATT takes a receipt out of the bag, smirking at it.
4. MATT: SHE'S UNDERCHARGED ME.
5. CAPTION: ...SHE COULDN'T COUNT.
PANEL FIVE
MATT looks just off-camera, pleasantly surprised.
6. MATT: I THINK I'M IN LOVE!
7. CAPTION: IT WAS THAT SIMPLE...
TO BE CONTINUED...
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