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| Matthew Craig: Host, Webmaster, and All-Around Chief Bum. |
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| To Myself, or you? I am putting myself through this, opening my soul to the English-speaking world, because you need to know that Life Isn't All That Bad. Weeeelll, kind of. This site is a place for me to pour out the stories that come about because of my, somewhat skewed (but not "wacky" or "zany," y'cheeky scamp) perspective on the world. After a long time preparing for a career in Science, I have decided that, like worms or Bill Oddie, it's Fer the Birds. So, on the dole and with little or no idea of what I want to fill that enourmous, career-shaped hole with, I'm killing time between signing-on at the dole and buying my comics by producing this site. You may applaud now. |
| The site is divided into a number of sections. The most important one is Views From Square One. This is the Essay section of the site, where I tell my stories, rant and rage at the world, and lech openly at prominent figures in the worlds of popular entertainment...and supermarkets. |
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| The second most updated section is Hondle. This is an irregular (and badly-drawn) comic strip based on the imaginary adventures of my dear departed dog. |
| The remaining areas of the site, Bad Fridge Poetry, Free Wallpaper, Mental Jukebox and Apply Linkage! are updated infrequently. Both Mental Jukebox and Apply Linkage! are open to submissions! If you have songs that put you in certain moods, or remind you of Times Past, then tell me about them. If you have favourite places to visit on the Web, then show me the door. |
| There are also one-off and Special branches to be explored: Read the story of one of my (many) Lost Loves in Comic Shop Romance. And meet the newest signing in Nominate a Celebrity Footballer. All sections of the site may be accessed from the start page, where you can also read Hey! Over Here!, the random thoughts and site updates column. These snippets are not archived, so if you miss them, they're gone forever! |
| ahem... Next Question. (Answer: as and when new stuff is finished. I'm trying to get into a rhythm, but it's kinda difficult.) |
| Stream of Consciousness meditation. In other words: I make it up as I go along... The bits that I don't steal, that is. Which probably explains a lot. |
| Quick list of boring stuff: Webbing: Yahoo! Pagebuilder (free and easy!); Netscape Composer; Microsoft Word / Front Page. Images: Xara 3D (3DText and spinning spider logo) and Paint Shop Pro 4 (everything else) Fonts: from PCFonts, 1001 Fonts and Blambot! Fonts. This site is designed to play on any machine, with any of the more recent versions of web browsers like Explorer or Navigator. There is NO FLASH or other multimedia. words and pictures. That's about all I can produce at this time, anyway. Any technical problems should be reported to me at the usual address. The site is usually updated overnight. I like the quiet the night proivides, although the sainted Mother isn't fond of hearing my staccato tapping through the wall at 4am. |
| Send money. Lots of money. Or failing that, sign the Guestbook. And if you want to take part in any of the Audience Participation stuff, then write to the Usual Address. Direct all Electronic Mail to: |
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| Other Answers: I swear because this is, largely, a Stream of Consciousness site. There are so many typos and errors because I write through the night. Lack of sleep equals diminished proofreading capacity. I would tidy the offending articles up, but it seems...wrong, somehow. Yes, I do read comics. Yes, I live with my parents. Yes, I am overweight. I am also hung like a fucking horny rhino, so screw you and your stereotypes. And yes. |
| Click above to return to the index page... |
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