Title:Forward Past
Part:4/4
Author:Abby
Email:[email protected]
Rated:PG-13 so far
Content:Language,Violence
Distribution:just ask, most likely I will let you
Disclaimer:I don't own Kristy,Maggie,Jeff,Matt,Amy,Shane,Shannon
Spoilers: naw man then what's the point
Summary:Abby's past starts to cloud her mind and starts to make her think twice. Will she stay???? or what will motivate her to leave????
Feedback: it's always motivation, so in other words, yeah
Note: The poem in this chapter was written by me (Abby) so do not take it

Forward Past chp1
Too happy,too perfect is what Abby thought. How an year ago she let things slid to easyily. How it ended just like that. Like nothing has happened in the past years. She didn't let the others know about her thoughts. She didn't let it show.
Abby was sitting in little JJ's room. Everybody started to call him lil' JJ. Kinda sums up though. He loves his uncle JJ and he is a Jeff Junior. But the common one was AJ for Abby Junior. Didn't matter he replied to it all.
"hey how did you do that?"asked Junior as him and Abby played Virtual Fighter 4 on PS2. Just one of the games he got for his birthday a fews months back.
"magic"
"you hungry?" asked Abby as she put the controller down after beating him
"you're the only person that i can't beat" he said as he frowned
Abby smiled "learn from the best. To tell ya the truth, i press any buttons"
"that's it, that's all you do?"
"yeah...be happy you know the different combonations" and she walked out.
She walked to the kitchen and grabbed a can of Mello Yello. She sat down at the table and grabbed her notebook behind her in the shelf drawer. She had alot going through her mind right now

Confused on what i have seen
Staring at me daily
Lost in this feeling
This unexplainable feeling
Unsure of the words
Are they true?
Are they lies?
All in the past
The past that haunts me constantly
Should i be thinking this?
Should i have done things differently?
Or most important
Should i be here?
Should i go?

Abby stopped when she heard the front door open. She heard Jeff's voice from the living room. She burried her head in her arms on the table. She listened to Jeff and Shannon continue the convosation they were having before they walked in. Abby then quickly sat up and looked at the clock "shit" and she got up. She walked to Junior's room
"hey,mommy will be right back ok"
"and where is she going?"asked Jeff as he came up from behind Abby and wrapped his arms around her. He rested his chin on her shoulder
"another dinner with my parents. We didn't really get to finish off our last one"
"that's 3 dinners so far" he said while spinning her around and resting his hands on her hips"is everything okay between you guyz?"
"i dunno yet. We still need to talk. So you guys are on your own tonight"
"awwwww" and he kissed her "i was hoping i would be able to have you tonight all to myself" and he kissed her again
"well that's too bad" and she smiled
"hey no mushy gushy stuff in this room"said Junior as he closed the door on them
Abby sat there in the kitchen of her parents place. A place that she onced call hers. They have been sitting in silence for a long while. Abby wanted to ask them one question that has been on her mind for awhile
"so what made you guys wanna talk and patch things up?" she asked breaking the silence
"well.."started her mom like she was waiting for that one" you are our daughter. The family has been telling us we need to and we should talk to you. I did carry you for nine months, i did supply your milk"
"what your mother is trying to say is that we came to our sense that we should have not done what we have done to you"
"we hope that we can forget the past and move on"
They both looked at Abby waiting for her reply. Abby just looked at her food
"we do wish we could have been there for you when you need us. We missed out on our mother-daughter convosations and Abby we just missed out on a lot as a family"
"and why do you think that? do you even know why you disowned me, told me that i was a mistake"
They looked at her blank and then at each others "well Abby...."
"you know what just nevermind it. I am willing to start over again. Just know it's gunna take awhile"
Just then the kitchen door opened "mom,dad I'm back"
I looked up as i heard that fimiliar "i'm outta here" and i stood up and started to walk towards the living room
"wait Abby" my dad said as he stood up
I turned around "what"
"this is another thing we wanted to talk about. About you and your sister"
As he said that i could feel my blood rush "my sister? After all that we have been through i would not consider my sister"
"wait Abby before you guys get anywhere..."
"Mandy you pregnant or just gettin' fat?" I asked as i looked at her
"Abby we have been talkin' to Mandy and she has been staying here with us lately because" she looked at Mandy
"wait Lily" Abby's fathere stopped here "we should tell her first" and he looked at Abby "Abby,honey" and he walked up to me" you see when i found out your mother was pregnant with you i left Mandy's mom so i could help your mom. What i didn't know was that Mandy's mom was pregnant too. She didn't bother to tell me until she dropped her off at the door"
"yeah so. You already told us"
"what we didn't tell you was that your mother and Mandy's mom were sisters"
Abby's eyes widen as she stared at her dad. Then she frowned with question "yeah so, What's that gotta do with us?"
"you see your auntie and were just like you and Mandy. But we had the same parents. Our parents split up because of us. My dad favoured me and my mom favoured Janice. They divorced when we were fifteen. Your father moved here not too long after and him and Janice started to go out. I didn't know because my dad and i moved outta town for abit. We moved back here when i was sixteen. That's when me and your father meet. We hit it off but he was still going out with your auntie but i didn't know. I didn't find out till after he left her for me because i was pregnant"
"what does this gotta do with us?"asked Abby again
"Abby i admit i was jealous of you"started Mandy "i alwayz have. You were the one everybody liked and you didn't even have to try"
"yeah so" Abby still had the questioned frown on her face
"Abby i'm six months pregnant with Jeff's baby"

Forward Past Chp2
Abby stood there hoping she heard wrong. Hoping Mandy did not say what she thought she said "what?"
"I'm pregnant with Jeff's baby"
"fuck that"she said as she frowned with disbelief
"Abby listen to your sister"said Lily
"then where the hell have you been all these months?"
"with my mom in Prince George"
"how do you know if you are saying this just to get Jeff back"
"Abby you got to believe me. Jeff was the last guy i slept with"she as she walked up to Abby and put her hand on her shoulder
"don't fuckin' touch me" she said as she shrugged her shoulder. She looked away from her "do you expect me to forgive you, to forget what you did to me. How you fucked up my life" she said with anger in her voice. Then she looked at her "is that what you want of me?"
"it would be for the best"
"for the best of what?? your baby to have a father to be there. Something that you've always had" then she looked down "you almost took that from my son. Those months you and Jeff were fooling around her drifted from his son. His third birthday Jeff missed it becuase he was out. He never came home the night before. My son cried because he thought his dad didn't love him. My son hated himself because he thought he was the reason his mom and dad weren't together. My son hated his father months ago, I had amnesia"
"ok Abby"said Mandy as she interupted her"look I'm sorry, that's all I can say and do"
Abby looked down. She felt a tear run down her cheek "this is fucked up"
"look Abby I'm not going to tell Jeff"she said
"why?" Abby shot back quickly as she looked up
"he doesn't need to know. Plus it will probably just add to the damage that has already been done. You don't need it and nobody else does. I just hope my child will be able to have an auntie because you are my only sister, my only sibling"
Abby looked at her. Then to her parents. She looked back down for a bit "fuck" and she walked away
"ABBY" yelled her mom after her
Abby got out as quickly as she could. Abby felt so frustrated,so angery, so lost. She started to cry abit. Tears feel from her eyes. She was half a block away from her street when she saw the whole clan about a block away. She slowed down abit a wiped the tears
"ABBYKINZ" Abby heard Kristy yell"WAIT UP"
She stopped at the crosswalk for them. She saw Junior start to run. As she waited she heard a car slow down behind her. She figured it was going to turn but she heard it stop. She turned around and saw Mandy step out of the car
"Mandy will you just please leave me alone right now"
"Abby I know you want to be alone right now but we need to talk. How about we go to Tim Horton's and have some coffee. Well you have coffee and i will have Apple Juice. I'll buy" she looked at Abby waiting for an answer "come on Abby, we mays well get this over and done with"
Abby looked over to everybody who were getting closer. Junior ran to Abby and hugged her "hey baby....ummmm tell daddy mommy will be back soon ok"
"where you going?"
"with Mandy" and she kissed him on the forehead and walked to the passenger side. Everybody caught up as they drove away.
Abby and Mandy sat down after they got an English Toffee and Apple Juice. They both sat for awhile not saying anything but looking at their drinks
"you wanted to talk. So what do you want to talk about?"started off Abby
"the baby"she said as she swallowed some Apple Juice "i already told you i am not going to tell him. Plus my boyfriend said he will take the responsibilty even though it ain't his"
Abby looked at her surprised "boyfriend?"
"yeah Julian. We started dating four months ago. He will be here in two days"
"you know what? I don't think we should keep it from Jeff. He needs to know. He has the right to know"
"no he doesn't. We can say it is Julian's. Only my mom, your mom, dad, Julian and you know. Julian can't wait. Like i said, this will added to what has happened in the past and will just be choas"
Abby sat there thinking "no i still don't think we should. It is going to haunt me. Knowing that I know it is his kid and he doesn't. When i am going to see your child, I am going to look at him and think "that's Jeff's kid and he doesn't even know it" and i don't want that. I rather him know even if it's going to the past and add more feelings. Might be emotional, who knows. But knowing this is and not telling the others is going to stress me out. I am already feeling a little depressed"
Mandy looked deep in Abby's eyes " fine. You want him to know, then you tell him"
Abby stalled a bit "me?"
"yeah you. You want him, you want them to know, then you tell them. By your reaction it is going to take awhile for you to tell him the truth. So for know i am not going to do anything. I will tell Julian that you are going to tell Jeff. You just tell me when you have told them"
"fine"
"now, about you and me" 

Forward Past chp3
Abby walked in the door to find everybody sitting and watching a movie. Everybody looked at her with curious eyes.
"where were you?"asked Jessica
"and why were you with Mandy"demanded Maggie
Abby looked around at them "i'm going to bed. I'm tired"
"wait Abby, why were you with Mandy?" repeated Kristy
"gawd. Do you guys have to know my every reasons" she snapped "look i have had a really stressed out time and all i want to do is go to bed" and she turned around and walked to her bedroom. She but on her PJ's and flopped on the bed. She layed there listening to the others talk in the room
"wonder why she is stressed?"said Matt
"yeah. I wonder why she is even talking to Mandy?"said Amy
"did you see Mandy. She is fat now"Kristy said
"maybe she is pregnat" suggested Shannon
"who would get that thing pregnant" said Maggie with a disgusted look on her face
Abby cover her head with the blanket and tuned them out. She put some music on and fell asleep. Abby woke up when Jeff crawled into bed and wrapped his arms around her to hold her. She layed there with her eyes closed pretending to sleep.

Abby woke up to the sound of the front door opening. She looked at the clock and it was 12:30pm. Then she heard some fimiliar voices
"where is my daughter?" she heard her dad
"what the hell is Mandy doing here" she heard Jessica say
Abby got up and headed for the door, although she didn't want to. She opened and slowly peeker her head before stepping out. When she saw it was her parents and Mandy she stood back and took a breath in and slowly breathed out
"i'll go get her"said Jeff
"Abigail" her mother said
"what?"
"come on we are going for lunch"said her father
"since when? you guyz should of phoned" she said as she stood on the second step
"what's going on between you guys?"asked Jeff as Abby got ready. She agreed to go with her parents
Abby looked at him"nothing. I don't know why they came here ok" and she walked out the door, closing it on Jeff
Abby,Mandy and their parents went Denny's. They sat at a table. Then about 20 minutes later some guy walked in that got Mandy to get up. He walked towards her and gave her a kiss. Abby figured this is Julian
"Julian this is my father, step-mother, and my sister Abigail"she said introducing them
"nice to meet you all"he said as he shook our hands and sat down
Abby kept thinking to herslef "is this all they brought me for?, I shouldn't of came" then she looked at Julian when he said something that caught her attention
"so i hear that you are going to tell Jeff. or that you want to"
"yeah"
"have you told him yet?"
"no"
"when do you plan on telling him?"
"when i feel like it"she said in a bitching tone
"and when will that be?"
"i'll let you know when i do so just don't rush me"she said in the same tone but frowning slightly
Then she looked at the door and saw the last person she wanted to, Justin.He spotted her and started to make his way to her
"fuck"she said in a low voice
"what?"her father asked
Everybody looked towards Justin
"who is that?"asked her mother
"i gotta go" and she got up. She walked towards Justin but she walked right by him
"Abigail" he said as she got closer
Abby just walked right by him. She only had her eyes on the door. She made it out and started to walk home. Abby noticed that she has been in a grumpy mood, a bitchy mood, a depressed mood. She was sure everybody else noticed too.

Forward Past chp4
When Abby got home everybody was in tha back. She sat on the couch. She felt like crying.
"hey get me a Coke" she heard Shane yell
"i want one too"she heard Kristy
She kept quiet as the person in the kitchen grabbed the drinks. Abby felt a tear run down her cheek. She felt so confused,so lost. Should she tell them, tell him. Everything seemed to be falling on her. By now she was crying softly. She got up to goto her room when Anna walked in
"Anna Marie" she said hoping she didn't notice she was crying
"Abby you ok?"she said as she gave her a hug
"no Anna i'm not" she said. She decided she has to let it out to somebody.
"come on"she said as she grabbed her arm and opened the door
They went outside in the front and sat on the steps. Abby sat there for awhile,collecting what she should tell Anna, and how.
"Anna, lately i have been so depressed,so stressed, and i don't know what to do"
"what's wrong?"
More tears came down "Anna, i thought i was happy, i thought i was happy when me and Jeff got back together"
"well aren't you"
"i am but lately i have been thinking. All those years"she paused"do we belong together? are we just forcing ourselves to be together to make everybody else happy?"
"Abby don't think that. You two belong together, you to love each others"
"life has throwen us so many challenges,so many difficulties, and now it just threw us another but only i know about it and......"
"what is it?"
Abby sat quiet for awhile"Anna, I just don't know what to do"she started to cry
Anna hugged her again. Abby cried as she did so
"hey what's going on?" they heard a voice
Anna looked up. Abby looked forward as she wiped the tears. She didn't want to look at who it is
"Abby, baby, you ok?"
She rather have anybody but Jeff be standing there at that moment. She looked down and then got up. She looked at Jeff. She could feel her eyes tighten for she knew he could tell she was crying and had something the mind. Anna got up and went in the house. Abby walked up the stairs and intened to walk past Jeff but he put his arm infront of her stomache and then went behind her and wrapped the other one around her
"are you ok?" he asked as he put his face beside her
"just a little peachy" she said as she looked down and rested against Jeff
Jeff held her tighter and rested his chin on her shoulder. He leaned his head against hers. Abby just closed her eyes. She felt so safe in his arms but why did this feel different. Jeff kissed her neck. She just kept her eyes closed. Then she noticed she he wasn't kissing her neck anymore. She opened her eyes
"Jeff what are you doing?" she said without moving
She felt his lips leave her neck "nothing" he said as he spun her around and pulled her close to him. He put his forhead with hers
"nothing my ass, you just gave me a hickey"
He kissed her "what are you going to do about it?" he smiled
She smiled for the first time in a long time. She felt she should tell him but now she was thinking. She she keep it from him. That Mandy was pregnant with his kid

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