Fucked up shook up give up throw up
Conflicted feelings in my anxiety sparked rage, make me numb I need to feel numb from you from me from the world.
You show me yours..i'll bite it off spit it out, dont doubt
Gone, now you're gone you say things in your drunken life, fill me up, lies make me think make me dream no aknowledgement passed the day I cant get it to go away I cant cry I cant scream I can tell anyone how I feel, I want to be still but I cant stop thinking what if.
I will prey on you essence and you can feel it slip away so subtle I drain you I will never go away your life has no meaning until you realize your purpose on this plain I will not relinquish my position to make you go insane
Consumed by your workds i've swallowed them whole as my throat expands i've played my trick i've laid my plan you will know my work recognize the distortion.
antipsychotics antidepressants loose control obsessive thinking compusive doing insanely wanting threatening explosions violence fighting pounding smashing dying flying crying these rhyme and dont match emotions sad happy confused anxious excited mad fucking pissed
white smoothe slightly cratered beautiful articulate in its own simplicity Karma Buddah genius spelling classes speed writing go to bed go to work get the energy get some drugs get high get low its going to come to blows but who will get hurt physical mental
blue eyes of innocence dreams will never come true emerging as they disenegrate rotting away as they appear
i wll never know the exact feeling for which i yearn
i am completely fulfilled yet something seems missing it always does the more humans get the more humans want Human Nature no one's ever completely happy completely consistently never normal i am not the only one who wants more
I've flown to high to far to know the mighty status quo below; and now im better than you i see; you cry and pout and bitch at me; grow up and try not to be those worthless people that disgust me; the harder you try the further you go the sadder you get your gonna blow and now im better than you they see you die and bleed and scream at me you run and drive to try to hide we hunt you down force you to slide its over now the time has come the silence presides over my kingdom.
The thoughts that are filling my consciousness dont consume the emptiness that surrounds my life day and night the lonliness is almost unberabe but it's hard to identify with the naked untrained eye and no one will ever know the pain i feel because my will wont let it show with every breath the time seeps by as i watch the icy crystals of the minters midnight air and think of the portrayal i've made in this conflicted pointless life so much to do that wont be realized wasted minutes muted hours how far will i go before the end realized im here.
He was amazingly articulate writing all that he felt standing in front of us all made my heart want to melt as he's driving away I run to catch up but the fumes from his car blind my path I cant jump
Miscellaneous patters run together in the sky as I try to figure out how that he's gonna die maybe, MAYBE i can help
Read the postcard I get once a year I can vaguely make out a tear I've given up, no more trying to save i fear, Maybe i can try to mend the broken mirror
The pain intense ever flowing im trying to talk you out of going we will all be here for you forever take a drink as you try to think you've never been much clearer kiss the ground as you turn around you will only get thru this sober and now i feel the end is coming i'll never understand why you're running life gets better wounds will heal as soon as you realize what is real