This is my life in a nutshell.  :(

 Patt

 
 

Subject: Help Me, Chief!

Chief, the only address I have memorized is this one, so I can get to this group but none of our others. How do I get signed on to AOL?

Love,
Jim
 
 

Subject: Are You An Idiot?

Jim, what the hell are you talking about?  We don't belong to AOL.  Use the Hotmail address I gave you.  And if you could memorize this address, then you should be able to remember any address.  Next time take a damn list.

Love,
Blair
 
 

Subject: I'm not an idiot.

Sandburg, thanks a lot.  I need your help and you're calling me an idiot.  I didn't think I would need those addy's.  I mean, how hard could it be, right?  I just figured I would sign in on my friends name and go from there.  But no.  He, of course, is out of town.  You know I'm here to help with his daughter. So I have to use her name to sign in.  There are restrictions on everything.  Shit...

Love,
Jim
 
 

Subject: ROFLMAO

Well, Big Man, I don't see anyone else in the bullpen, so I'm laughing my ass off over this one.  Only you would be leaving me messages on a newsgroup list.  You do know that everyone is reading about what a twit you are, right?  I hope you know it's not just going to me.  Anyhow, why not sign in on your friends name?  Just ask what the password is and go from there.

Love,
Blair
 
 

Subject: I've tried that already.

I've signed in so many times that they're wondering who's trying to get into his account.  I can't figure his password out.  He's usually pretty simple.  His name on the account is his last name, so I figured it would be something simple for the password.  I've tried everything.  :(  Got any ideas? Did you know that I can't sign into our account from a child's account?  What a fucking bunch of shit...

Love,
Jim
 
 

Subject: Hey, Jim!

Give it up, Jim.  You're not going to get anywhere getting frustrated and pissed off.  So, just stay calm and try to wait it out.  How long are you going to be gone again.  Just kidding.  I'm having fun without you.  I can get to all of my newsgroups.  I get all of my email.  I basically can do everything.  Wow, it's wonderful to be me.

Love,
Blair
 
 

Subject: Fuck you, Blair!

You're an asshole.  I can't believe you're doing this to me.  I'm having email withdrawl and you're making jokes?  Not funny.  Just see how funny it is when I get home and you never get sex again.

Love,
Jim
 
 

Subject: Remember where we are?

Jim, do you remember that we're on a newsgroup?  Cuz you know, a lot of folks don't know we're sleeping with each other but they do now.  Geeze.  Why not take out an ad?

Love,
Blair
 
 

Subject: Fuck you again.

You are the most unsupportive lover I could ever hope to have.  Geeze, I hate you when you're like this.  I'm not writing again.

Jim
 
 

Subject: I'm sorry.

I'm sorry, Jim.  I'll be good from now on and I won't tease you anymore.  I'll pretend like it's not a big deal that you didn't get the info from your friend before he left town.  I'll pretend that you do know how to work the damn computer without me sitting beside you.  And I'll pretend that you didn't just tell everyone on this newsgroup that we're lovers.  Now calm down.  When you talk to him next, just get his password.  And don't ever sign a note, Jim again.  It had better say love, Jim or I'm kicking your ass.
 
 

Subject: I'm sorry, too.

Hey, Chief, I'm sorry.  I'm a grouch.  When he calls in three days I'll get the info.  God, if I can just make it until then, I've got it made.  Sorry I was grouchy.  Sorry I outed us onlist.  Sorry I'm such a dick.  I love you.  I miss you.  But I miss the email more.  <g>

Love,
Jim
 
 

Subject: You're in for it.

You are 'so' going to get it when you get back, big man.  I miss you, too.  And I also miss your emails.  Look forward to hearing from you the regular way soon.

Love,
Blair
 
 

Email: [email protected]
 

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