--Sasha of London, Britain
Puerto Ricans, at least in my family (yes, I have Puerto Rican family), are very giving and caring. Everytime I left my grandfather's house as a kid, I would leave with some sum of money rolled into my hand. They believe there is no way we can leave without a gift from them.
But does that make me a guilty person for accepting the money without giving anything in return? In this case, no, because I was giving them my company. That's how I think it works, at least. As for the season of giving (so PC of me), in their little circle, all the Puerto Ricans in my family just give presents anyway. Recieving and giving pretty much become equal, because you're always giving something and you're always recieving something, too.
In the Puerto Rican life, is the thought that counts? Of course it is. They can give you a pencil, but they were thinking about you and that's all that matters. They haven't completely wiped you off of the face of the Earth yet. Wait until next year, maybe they'll think of you sooner and you'll get a car.
The American (stereotypical, of course) view is different, however. Americans are capitalists, they're in it for the money or themselves. Why would they even think of telling their kids that giving is better than recieving? It's entirely against their nature. But, revisiting the Meaning of Life write-up, you have to consider that Americans don't necessarily tell their children what they really believe. Creations such as the Tooth Fairy, the Easter Bunny and Giving have all been smeared from religion to form a semi-true substitute for what Americans see as "real values" until their kids can learn these "truths."
The best gift for an American is the one he recieves. The phrase "It is better to give than to recieve" is a blinder that parents put on their children for one reason or another. In reality, it's a way for the parents to manipulate their children into giving them something. Who else would the child give a present to? Sure, his siblings if he had some, but that's just another bonus for the adult. The more the child gives, the less the parent has to give and the more they recieve. That's so capitalist of them...
Is it the thought that counts with the Americans? No, of course not. First of all, America is a stupid country and it shouldn't have the right to think. Everytime it thinks, something like The Patriot Act happens. Secondly, if it was the thought that counts, then the Americans wouldn't give anything in the first place. The Americans give presents not for the thought of the person they're giving it to, but for the thought of themselves. That's not "the thought" that the phrase is talking about. And isn't it always an awkward moment in TV shows and movies when someone says, "Well...it's the...thought that...counts...?" All this phrase really means is, "Shit, you're stupid. That's not what I wanted at all, but morals that magically appeared in my head tell me I should accept it anyway."
The Episcoplian view is another thing all in itself. You see...life consists of two things...bread...and...wine. As long as those are around, who cares who's giving what? Does it really matter that much when you have the two simple joys of life? If it bothers you that much, drink some more wine and things will clear up.
Do Episcopalians think it's the thought that counts? Is it red wine? If it's not, we don't want it.
Now, what does this have to do with a British Anglican? Well, there's always the fourth view: The World View. Good values tells us that yes, it's better to give than recieve. It means we care for the people we're giving the present to and recieving is just something for ourselves. It is the thought that counts, because you were thinking of something and even if you didn't give them what they wanted, you were still showing an effort.
But, unfortunately, not everyone sees it that way. The world isn't always a place for someone who thinks about everything. Sometimes one would be a lot safer to think of oneself. It's all really just a matter of judgement and personality. For me, I don't have any money, so giving can't happen. But when I do have money to give people things, I try my hardest. And I don't like recieving, because I don't like money (mostly because I don't have any). People spending money on me isn't my favorite thing.
Is it better to give than to recieve? Is it really the thought that counts? I don't know. Who are you?
