Mars officer accused of war crimes

Kassandra Kyznetsova, Moscow/2058 12 12

In a strongly-worded accusation that includes a 30-second video clip, the international watchdog agency Children of Conflict has denounced Colonel Fyodor Korolev, the second-in-command of the Mars Colonization Mission, as a war criminal.

Col. Korolev, who has been decorated as a Hero of Russia and received the Cosmonaut Yuri Gagarin Medal for his contributions to the space program, is a revered figure here in Russia.  He is the last person anyone would suspect of atrocities.  But Sam Defontaine, director of Children of Conflict, is adamant.
"Throughout 2037, Col. Korolev served in a helicopter wing in the Russian Air Force in Kazakhstan.  He was there in December when gunships of his squadron destroyed the village of Baghys, on the Uzbek border, and massacred the civilian population," said Defontaine.  "This isn't just an accusation.  We have a film."

The film in question appears to be vehicle camera footage, and is dated 2037 10 01.  It shows helicopters attacking a Kazakh village, identified as Baghys, while its citizens look in vain for shelter from the hail of steel and fire.

"That's incendiary ammunition," says Defontaine, freezing a frame of the clip.  "And those there are explosive penetrating rounds.  Using this stuff on civilians - it's just disgusting."

A moment later one of the helicopters lands, and the pilot emerges:  it is unmistakeably then-Captain Fyodor Korolev.

"Atrocities, of course, were sadly common during the Third World War," says Defontaine.  "What makes this case special is that the perpetrator is alive and honoured."

Colonel Korolev could not be reached for comment.  Mission Commander Lata Durrani, contacted at "Chedrin Base" for comment, stated that "Colonel Korolev is currently on stress leave and I presume he will be resuming his duties before too long.  I am sure that the truth about these allegations will be discovered soon."

Asteroid mission "urgent":  scientists

Oshima must not be neglected

A formal letter from one thousand physical scientists worldwide has been sent to the United Nations Office of Outer Space Affairs, petitioning for a human-crewed mission to the enigmatic asteroid 2011-13B Oshima.

"The incredible and tantalizing discoveries at Oshima by the Mars Colonization Mission must not be neglected," reads the letter, whose signatories include Nobel laureate Subash Pereira and lunar geologist Ricarda Spelvan.  "It is becoming evident that we are not alone in the universe.  We have an obligation to discover more about our place in it."

The majority of world scientific opinion holds that the Oshima finds, which include a gigantic parabolic mirror shaped from vitrified rock, are evidence of extraterrestrial intelligence.
 

Kevlar Bodybags charged with sacrilege

Partridge says "not my problem"

Lana Morrison, Boulder, Colorado, USA/2058 12 12

The English bash group Kevlar Bodybags is still detained here, accused of "Un-Christian activities," and is likely to remain for some time, according to a U.S. government spokesperson.

The group, which consists of Denis Maciver, Fatima Hammadi, Wally Crope and Jospin Llewellen, was taken into custody on 20 August after the third concert of their wildly successful Sludge Muster Memorial Tour.  They have since been held in the Boulder Facility of Colorado State Prison pending formal charges.  The United States government objects to the lyrics of their songs, which include such lines as "God is dead, and we're the ones that did it," to a background of mortar fire.

The appeals of the English government, including a direct request from Prime Minister Eva Singh for the group's repatriation, have so far fallen on deaf ears.  "They have broken American law and must be tried," said Ezekiah Masterman, of the U.S. Justice Department.  "The United States is the freest nation on Earth, but there are laws against blasphemy in this country and that's that."

President James Partridge concurred.  "Whether they're American citizens or not isn't the issue," he said when asked for his opinion by a CINN reporter.  "They came here as guests, and they abused our hospitality.  I have said before, and I say again, that God's law is higher than that of England.  This will be dealt with according to the venerable and holy legal system of the United States of America.  It is not, I repeat not, my problem."

The group appeared in the Colorado State Court on Friday, where they were formally charged with blasphemy, sacrilege and contributing to the delinquency of minors.  If found guilty, they could face up to three years imprisonment.
 

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