Hattrickers Around the World
Hello.  My name is Kim Hansen.  I am a doctoral candidate in sociology at the University of California, San Diego.  Off and on.  On a more permanent basis, I play hattrick. 

Since this is my page, I'm in the foreground of this picture.  In the background is my friend Shehzad.  He is also in the sociology department.  He also plays hattrick.  His team is called "pakistanis".  They play in the United States fifth division.

The picture was taken one evening in San Francisco.  We had gone there to attend a conference.  Shehzad was apparently pleased with the way his tonsils had handled themselves on the flight up there. 

See?  Aren't his tonsils splendid?
One day, I was visited in San Diego by Staale from Norway.  He now lives between San Diego and Los Angeles with his family.  His hattrick team is called Steel, and plays in Norway's division II.2

In this picture, he is explaining to me how best to train forwards.  I am clearly astonished by his counsel.

What tips did he give me?  Ha ha ha.  You'd like to know that, wouldn't you?
Here we are again, each with a dozen donuts from KrispyKreme. 

KrispyKreme donuts are wonderful.  They taste absolutely fantastic.  KrispyKreme don't have to lock their cash registers.  Anyone who robs them is after the donuts, not the money.

If the United States sent 80 quadrillion dollars worth of KrispyKreme donuts to the middle east instead of 80 quadrillion dollars worth of weapons, they would have no more enemies.  Just fat, happy friends.

With diabetes.
In September, 2004, I went to Australia to visit my friend Rachael.  Her team is the Gothic Wombats and they play in Oceania's division IV.56.

The picture was taken at a place called Katoomba, where we went by train to see some rocks called the Three Sisters.

We got caught in drizzle and hail, and I was most perplexed at the sight of a tropical bird standing on the ground in a parking lot up to its ankles in hail.

Cockatoos belong in cages, not in hail!
I also spent a fun afternoon with Ken Huang while Rachael was at work. He played in IV.56 too, at the time, but is now in V.93,  His team is lotto Olympique.

We went to the Sydney Aquarium, had a good lunch, and saw a man on George Street holding a sign offering passersby "free hugs".  It was interesting to watch people gather the courage to approach him and receive their hug, and how the whole thing put a smile on people's faces.  Still, I wouldn't recommend trying this in the US.  You're likely to get shot, sued for sexual harassment, or arrested for loitering.

We held his sign while he took our picture.
Early in November, 2004, I flew from California to Oslo to see Lyn play in the Norwegian cup final.  I traveled from California to Norway and back in 85 hours and 40 minutes. I left Friday, arrived Saturday, saw the game Sunday, and returned late Monday.

In between arriving around noon on Saturday, November 6, and going to Lyn's cup final party that evening, I met some hattrickers at a pub in Oslo.  Some are rivals of mine from Norway's IV.54, others play in the Oslo Supporter Derby federation (OSD) - some both!

The guy in the redshirt is my old friend Erik. We went to school together and stuff.  His team, Gruner, used to play in IV.54 until he got promoted to III.16.  But the guy standing above him in the top picture, Torkel, is still there.  His team is Marxistene, and we were promoted to IV.54 the same season.  We've had many good games. And some painful ones. Erik and Torkel are both in OSD, too.

The woman sitting in the foreground is Kathinka Ihlen, manager of PMS United from Norway's V.125 and long-time member of OSD.

Behind her are tcelind, manager of Tribunegjengen in Norway IV.33, and bjerkelars, who manages Nerdelokka in Norway V.190.  I can't remember which of them is the hairy one...  But bjerkelars is active in OSD, and tcelind competes in the IV.54 tipping competition.
While at the pub, I also met my IV.54 arch rival.  Mats is this Norwegian punk who keeps disrespecting Lyn and generally making a nuisance of himself.  On the plus side, he's a rather gullible and predictable manager...  His team is Marlboro United, which stands for conformity, cancer, urine-breath, giant evil corporations and sexual impotence. 

Given that I love Lyn and hate smoking, it is perhaps not a surprise that our first meeting went as it did...
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