By Mental

The fabled Counterweight Continent. These days, you cannot listen to the talker for 5 minutes without someone asking how to get to CWC, whether someone has CWC weaponry or clothing for sale or if Bes Pelargic really has streets paved with gold and luggages running around like frog-powder fuelled student wizards.

The existence of CWC seems to be generally accepted as a fact. One hears fellow players, often even players of good reputation, speak about having been to this mythical continent and thus everyone believes in it without a doubt. Little do they know that in doing this they are participating in maintaining the biggest hoax ever in Discworld history!
For, in reality, CWC has not been opened at all. The CWC myth is just a cleverly created smokescreen to divert our attention from the big intrinsic problems in the coding structure of this game. You are all hopping on the biggest bandwagon of the century!

Often have I tried on various channels to make people realize that they are being tricked, but most responses I get are scoffing remarks and disparaging pats on the head.
Therefore, to finally clear up this whole mess, I have decided to reveal to you in full the real plot behind the fa�ade as far as I have been able to unravel. Read and shudder:

Creators: Oh gods oh gods oh gods! All these intrinsic flaws in our code, we will never be able to fix them! We will have to completely and devastatingly alter the whole coding structure, if we are to solve this mess. And meanwhile players keep complaining and whining! We need a diversion to get their tiny little minds off the real problems in the game, to make the whining stop and to soften them up for the upcoming changes. But how do you sidetrack an entire player community? Should we start having U.F.O. sightings?

Players: Oh we are so bored. Creators, why don't you code us some new rooms?

Big Evil Soxpiracy Creator Womble Core (Bes CWC): Yes! That's it! We tell the players that there will be a whole new continent. And that it will be about as big as AM and then some! And while they are bending their mushy soggy brains around this concept, they will forget about the -real- problems and their annoying whining will be restricted to buggering us about when this fake continent will come into play. We can cope with that!

Players: Woe is us, some commands are behaving really weird. And there is so much imbalance! Something must be wrong.

Bes CWC: Don't worry about it, everything is fine. And to keep you all docile... erm... we mean, to show that everything is fine, we are even coding you a new continent, CWC!

Players: Wow! A new continent! Gold, pearwood chests, new rooms! We love you, creators!

Time passes.

Players: When oh when oh when will CWC come into play? Tell us please!

Bes CC: Darn, I think they are starting to get impatient. I fear we won�t be able to keep them on a leash for much longer with promises of a non-existent continent. What do we do now?

Most cunning cre (more cunning than a fox that used to be professor of cunning at Oxford University but has moved on, and is now working for the UN at the high commission of international cunning planning): Why not simply -tell- the players when CWC is coming? It will give them something to look forward to. And most likely the oldbies will want to look smug towards the newbies, so they will take over from us promoting the hoax! It will thus even -reduce- whining for a while. Pure headology!

Players: Oh when oh when oh when will CWC come in?

Cunning cre: Thursday.

Players: shocked silence

Players: Erm... -this- Thursday...?

Cunning cre: Ah! I didn't say that, did I? ;P

Players: Woo hoo! It will come in on Thursday!

Many Thursdays pass.

Newbie: helo I haerd about CWC. When si CCW comign IN GAEM?!?1?

Oldbies: Thursday :)

Newbie: oooh but it si tHRUSDAY NOW!!! WHERE SI CWC?!

Oldbies: Hehe, silly kid. You will understand when you grow up. PS: read help caps.

Creators: darn, the cunning cre was right! The oldbies are actually helping us to keep up the fib, by wanting to look smug and in possession of inside info that the little ones do not have! It is brilliant!

Many more Thursdays pass.

Players: erm...say, you creators said that CWC would be coming in on Thursday, but we've had loads of those and it still isn't here... Are you pulling our tails?

Bes CC: Uh oh, tricky, I think the headology is wearing out. What do we do now, cunning cre?

Cunning cre: Hrm, tough one. I know, let's bribe the playtesters into cooperation and claim it has gone into playtesting!

Playtesters: ooooh, creator toys!

Players: when will we get CWC?!

Creators: we are not telling you! *poke PTs*

PTs: Huh?

Creators to PTs: your turn, people! Remember the toys!

PTs: oh, right. Erm... We are not allowed to say, but you 80 people are good friends of ours so we will tell you -in confidence- that CWC has gone into playtesting!

80 good friends: Hurray!

Players: When oh when etc.

80 good friends: Hehe, we know something you don't. It is in playtesting already ;P

Players: ooooooooooooooh.

Many more Thursdays pass.

Players: yeah, hum, is this thing ever going out of playtesting then?

Bes CC: drats, I think we are getting in over our heads now. Maybe we should simply claim it has opened already and bribe some players to shout on every channel and board that they have been to CWC. Then, when the rest wants to go, we simply claim it is very hard and dangerous to get there.

And so it came to be, and dozens of players were bought, dozens more hopped onto the bandwagon to safe face and there was much rejoicing. Meanwhile, while we are all stumbling and trampling over one another to try and reach this non-existent continent, our attention is carefully shifted from the enormous upcoming changes that will drastically alter the Disc as we know it. A most effective hoax indeed.

So I urge you all to wake up. Think, people, think! Roswell, Roswell!!