Author's Ranting: Ah haha! I had to rest for a few days...scrapped a
couple of plots and hatched a few mad schemes. I am ready to write once
more. Now that Megumi and Kenshin have seen Kaoru and Sano at their most
transparent, it is up to our foxy doctor and resident redhead to
discover how to reverse this process. If it is at all reversible. Of
course it is reversible! It has to be. I'm not writing any yaoi lemons.
Yet. *maniacal laugh*

Disclaimer: All standard disclaimers apply. None of the Rurouni Kenshin
characters belong to me. (Damn it!) Also, the title is taken from a Hong
Kong film and I acknowledge all rights of the associations associated
with it and again, the title is NOT MINE! Nothing here belongs to me
except the plot.



(What is Gracey-san yammering about? Of course this process is
reversible! By all the laws of medical science- well actually by all the
laws of medical science what happened to Ken-san and me is impossible! I
don't care! I refuse to be stuck in Ken-san's body anymore. I want mine
back! Do you know how hard it is for me to resist kissing Sano no baka
now that I know he loves me? ....sigh ....and he is so kawaii and so
many other girls notice that too. Of course, when I go to town with him
I get a lot of looks too, thanks to Ken-san being pretty kawaii himself.
Except that not just the girls look but the men too. No wonder that
Tanuki-chan is so jealous over him. Maybe she should watch out for Aoshi
and his weird obsessions, ohohoho! Not to mention that Shishio managed
to give Kenshin what is in a warped and bizarre way (But is there any
other way with Shishio?) a love-bite. Alright, alright, I'll stop before
I get stoned. On with the show.)




(iv)
The Plot Unravels


Kenshin gritted his teeth and plastered himself against the wall as best
he could. All that did was earn him a smouldering look from Sanosuke and
a smirk. Clearly it read: "Whatever. This time you're mine." And to
Kenshin's infinite horror, Sano ignored the boundaries of propriety,
modesty and whatever dinky old customs that accompanied the rules of
courtship, stretched out an arm and neatly trapped him.

'No Sano! No! Sessha doesn't want to be kissed by you!' Actually,
Kenshin realised that Sano didn't want to kiss him either. Sano was only
interested in the Fox Doctor. It was just plain perverse bad luck that
Kenshin, was at the moment, stuck in Megumi's body. Just then Sano
leaned further in and a yelp escaped Kenshin. He turned his cheek just
in time to avoid what would have been the lightest of kisses from Sano.

'This is Jinchuu. Enishi would die of happiness if he could just see
what was happening,' Kenshin wailed inwardly. 'Tomoe, Kaoru, help sessha!'

"Why Fox, I didn't think you were so shy," Sano grinned and Kenshin did
his best to glare at Sano. "Oh, so you gonna bite if I try that again?"

"You have no idea what measures I'll resort to," Kenshin said with a
grim smile. Sano's smirk only widened.

"Oh, kinky."

Kenshin resisted the urge to kick Sano where it would hurt the most. He
couldn't do that; it would be the ultimate betrayal of his fellow
brothers and of his masculinity. He was stuck in a woman's body but he
wasn't going to behave like one!

"Ahem. What is going on in here, de gozaru?"

Thank you Kami-sama, Kenshin shouted in his mind. Finally, Megumi was
here to rescue him. Standing there in the doorway, with menacing amber
eyes, she really did look like the Battousai. If only she hadn't taken
to plaiting his hair. She had even wanted to add a ribbon, anything to
cling to her femininity. He had had to beg her on bended knees not to do
that.

Sano scowled in displeasure but he dropped his pose at once and Kenshin
scuttled to safety behind Megumi. "Please, Sano. Kaoru-donno would be
most unpleased to know that such things are taking place in her dojo.
You must observe the notions of modesty and propriety here," she said
piously.

Good lord, Sano was going to think that he, Himura Kenshin, was a prude.

'Geez Kenshin, yer such a prude. No wonder you haven't made any progress
with Jou-chan yet,' Sano grumbled inwardly. But Kenshin was right. A
determined gleam entered Sano's eyes and he looked at the foxy doctor
who was standing behind Kenshin. If he wanted to seduce her and make her
his, he would have to get her on his home ground. 'There'll be no escape
for you then Megumi.'

............................

"Whew, arigatou gozaimasu Megumi-donno. You just saved sessha from a
horrible experience." Kenshin shuddered in horror when he thought of
what might have happened. He was about to put a hand to his heaving
bosom before he remembered and snatched it away in time.

"Saved you eh? It sure looked to me like you were leading him on," came
the curt reply.

"ORO?!"

"Sheesh Ken-san. With your back pressed against the wall and that
half-panicked virginal look on yer face, what did you think it would do
to a guy like Sano? He probably thought you were just playacting!"

Things were making some sense now. No wonder Sano had not taken 'no' for
an answer.

"You think Sessha was not firm enough?"

"I've seen weeping willows with more firmness."

"Hey!"

"Sometimes I have no idea who's the real man and who's the real woman."

"Now that is just too much, de gozaru! Take that back this instant,"
Kenshin snapped. And stamped his foot. Megumi gave him a smirk worthy of
Saitou. "Are you actually jealous Megumi-donno?" Kenshin tried another
tact. Amazingly it worked. Doubt flickered over her face and turned the
violet eyes a dark volatile purple. "Megumi-donno! Sessha cannot have
you doubting me now!"

"How am I supposed to know? You and Sano are so close. People in town
talk you know. Especially since you're such a pretty boy."

It took all of Kenshin's willpower not to sink to the ground in a
despairing heap. But the next minute he felt a warm hand on his shoulder
and looked up to see Megumi watching him apologetically.

"I'm sorry, Ken-san. It's just that ..." she broke off, gave a hefty
sigh and continued. "It's been almost three weeks since the incident and
...well ...I'm beginning to feel ...less and less like a woman. It's
like I'm getting used to being in your body. I'm just frightened that
...that one day if the process is not reversed in time, we'll be stuck
like this forever."

"Hai. Sessha understands. These days I feel my spirit settling inside
your body as well." It was a dreadful sobering thought, especially in
the light of the events that had happened in the past days.

Kaoru and Sano had no idea what had happened and so had confessed their
innermost feelings to Kenshin and Megumi, thinking that the former was
the latter and vice versa. It had been enlightening, rapturous even, to
hear the objects of their love confirm and reveal feelings and insights
that they might otherwise have not gotten to hear. But it would all be
in vain if the transformation were not reversed. And soon.

The hardest part of the whole thing was that now Kaoru and Sano had
taken it into their heads to get their man and woman. And that was
partially Megumi and Kenshin's faults. In their positions as 'friends',
they had encouraged and reassured the other two that their feelings were
returned. Well, 'guaranteed' would be more accurate but no one could
blame Kenshin and Megumi.

"What are we going to do Ken-san?" Megumi muttered. "If I keep running
to your rescue, sooner or later Sano is going to think that I, 'Himura
Kenshin', have feelings for you, 'Takani Megumi'. I can already feel his
jealousy and irritation."

"Hai. Kaoru is also beginning to suspect that something is not right,"
Kenshin murmured softly. "But we just don't know how this happened."
Frustrated, he kicked a stone out of his way, eyes focused on the ground
before him. They were in the forest behind the dojo. Whenever they
managed to get some free time alone, Kenshin and Megumi would meet there
to discuss what they should do. It gave them privacy and reduced the
risk of being overheard.

"I'd also like to know how this happened. Are Kaoru and Sano's
suspicions right or not?"

"Oro! Yahiko!" Kenshin jumped a foot in the air as did Megumi. Her
senses were not even a fifth as finely tuned as his and as respectful of
her body as he was, sometimes Kenshin felt like he was handicapped in
it. And although Megumi had his trained body, it didn't matter that she
could hear better or sense things better if in the first place, she
didn't pay attention to her surroundings.

"Since when did you start talking like Kenshin, Megumi?" There was
genuine surprise in the boy's voice before his black eyes narrowed.
"Since you two started going out behind Sano and Kaoru's back?"

"Yahiko, of course not! Why would you think-?"

"Umm, let's see. Sano has been complaining that you, Kenshin, have
repeatedly spoiled his attempts to get together with Megumi ..."

"Well, I'm sure Sano didn't tell you what his idea of a 'get together'
is," Kenshin muttered under his breath. Yahiko glared at 'Megumi' for
interrupting him and went on.

"Also, Kaoru has noticed that you and Megumi have been going off a lot
lately. Alone. In the forest. Very romantic, neh?" Yahiko clenched his
fists, black brows meeting in an angry slash. He had seen Sano stalk out
of the dojo and curiosity had propelled him to check things out. He had
been almost shocked that Kenshin hadn't caught him out at once but he
and Megumi had been too absorbed in their conversation. Yahiko had
managed to catch that last incriminating bit before his outrage got the
better of him.

"Yahiko, it isn't what it looks like."

The boy looked sceptically at Megumi who had spoken. He saw her turn to
Kenshin who nodded in apparent resignation. "We might as well tell
Yahiko," Kenshin muttered. For the first time Yahiko noticed the fat red
braid that hung around the rurouni's shoulders. 'Boy, is Kenshin turning
queer.'

"This had better be good, guys." He crossed his arms and waited.

When they were done telling him the truth, Yahiko continued standing
where he was, eyes fixed on them. Then he made a dash for it before
Megumi and Kenshin pounced on him and hauled him back.

"You two are nuts!"

"Don't be idiotic. The only ones here with nuts are you and Kenshin."
Yahiko's eyes widened as out of the rurouni's mouth popped that utterly
crass remark which would have done Sano proud. The real Kenshin would
rather have died than say such a thing. Such a thing would probably not
have even crossed the real Kenshin's mind.

"Oh my God. It's true."

"See, I knew Yahiko-chan would catch on," Megumi said triumphantly to a
slightly red-faced Kenshin. "What?"

"Oro, Megumi-donno. Sessha would like not to hear such horrible comments
coming from my mouth. It's embarrassing, de gozaru."

Yahiko stared back and forth, mouth hanging open. "How in the world did
this happen?"

"We just told you we don't know, Yahiko-chan," Megumi said smugly and
was rewarded with a kick.

"Don't call me 'chan'!"

"Yahiko, don't kick Sessha! It's Megumi-donno talking but that is still
my body!"

"NANI?"

All three of them paused. After a small eternity, Kenshin turned around.
Kaoru and Sano were standing behind them, looks of consternation on
their faces.

"What's going on? What did you just say Megumi?" Kaoru demanded.

Before they could shut Yahiko up, the boy wriggled free. "Megumi's a man
and Kenshin's a woman!"

Stunned silence greeted his outburst. The wind blew, parting the green
leaves and branches above, spilling sunlight onto the five figures
below. No one said a word as Kenshin and Megumi buried their faces in
their hands.

------------------------------------------------------------------------