Disclaimer: All standard disclaimers apply. None of the Rurouni Kenshin
characters belong to me. (Damn it!) Also, the title is taken from a Hong
Kong film and I acknowledge all rights of the associations associated
with it and again, the title is NOT MINE! Nothing here belongs to me
except the plot.

Author's Ranting: Okay, please do not kill me for writing this or if you
feel I have treated the development of the characters too lightly. This
was meant as a relaxation piece in between a Saitou/Tokio fic that is
horribly hard to write ......wah! H/w, I did try to be extra careful
when delving into the characters' insights about their relationships
with their respective loves. And I do think that Kenshin's "please don't
love me or I'll sully/endanger you" attitude is rather condescending. I
mean, Kaoru isn't a foetus, she can think for herself!

Also, I would really love some comments on this piece. Would like to
know where I'm going wrong or whether this is boring or whether anyone
likes it. Please, please send c&c. Even a monosyllabic comment like
"Nice" or "ugh" will suffice. Arigatou!


Notes: Thoughts expressed in ' '


HE'S A WOMAN, SHE'S A MAN


(One should always be careful what one wishes for. But aside from
moralising and all, let's just get to it, shall we? My name is Himura
Kenshin and between you and me, I think sessha has got to be the number
one on everybody's sympathy list. Just see. First I'm made a slave to
Kaoru-donno, not that sessha minds at all, so long as I can be close to
her. Then I'm yanked out of my peaceful Rurouni existence by Saitou
Hajime, that sour-faced ...urk! Gracey-san, please be careful with that
nihonto ....maa, maa, sessha was just kidding about Saitou. After that,
I had to clean up the Japanese government's mess, fight Seta Soujiro
(never seen a cuter psycho) and Shishio Makoto (hope I never again see
that psycho). And after all that, my brother-in-law, Yukishiro Enishi
tried to kill my beloved Kaoru-donno and me. For Tomoe's sake, sessha
will refrain from insults. But now, now, I have to live through being
hit on by Sano! Not that Sano isn't cute and all but heck, I'm a man! A
man! And all you hentai fans out there can kiss my ass! On second
thoughts sessha takes that back. Let's just get to it shall we?)



(i)
One Fine Day


For once the dojo was utterly silent. Kaoru washed the dishes and set
them aside to dry. Next she practised her kenjutsu. "Whew, you need to
brush up there. Soon even Yahiko will be better than you. And won't he
love lording it over you," she muttered. Speaking of the little brat, he
had skipped out on the morning's practise by citing the excuse that he
had promised Tsubame he would help Tae and her out at the Akabeko.

Kenshin was off with Megumi, picking herbs in the forest. The bokken
arced through the air with the speed of light. Megumi had better only be
picking herbs. Kenshin was so clueless at times, so innocent. It was
hard to believe that not only had he not bungled paving the way for the
Meiji Era, he had actually been the best, the smartest and the strongest
assassin. Period. An unwilling smile touched her lips. No matter how
much she detested Battousai, she couldn't help but feel proud of
Kenshin's willingness to help, his generosity, his heart.

A shadow fell across her face. That was the problem. She had no idea
what was in his heart. Did he love her? Did he still love Tomoe? She was
sure that he had loved her especially after the incident with Enishi.
"Then why hasn't he proposed damn it?" she asked through gritted teeth.

"Maybe he's shy?"

"Aiiie ..." Kaoru jumped in fright and automatically swung the bokken,
twisting gracefully.

"Itteeee ...." Sano shouted as the wooden sword landed square on his
head. Falling to the ground, he proceeded to shout curses and swear
words to the roof, some of which she had never heard before. Kaoru shook
her head wryly and pulled him up.

"I guess you learn something new everyday. No wonder Megumi-san refuses
to take you seriously. You are a gangster, Sano," she scolded. He
scowled and rubbed his bruised flesh tenderly.

"Well, getting whacked on the head isn't the best way to start the day,
know what I'm saying?" he drawled and brushing back his thick mahogany
hair, rubbed his tummy with the other hand. "What's for breakfast?"

"Are you sure you want to eat my cooking?" Her eyes twinkled as Sano
actually paled in spite of the bright sunshine that was pouring into the
dojo.

"Nani? Didn't Kenshin cook breakfast for you?" Sano was ready to bolt.
Kaoru was a lovely girl and all, he would give his life to save her. But
eating her cooking ...he really might have to give his life although in
an entirely different sense.

Taking pity on him, Kaoru revealed that Kenshin had thought that Sano
just might come over and hence he had made extra food. "Ah hah, I knew
it. I can always count on him. If not I was thinking of bumming a meal
off at the Kitsune's."

"Really Sano, don't you think it's time you provided for yourself?"
Kaoru was feeling a stab of empathy for Megumi when she froze and turned
to Sano in curiosity. "Didn't you know that Megumi was out at the crack
of dawn with Kenshin?"

Sano never stopped eating but there was something in the way he looked
at her from beneath his lashes, a glint that he couldn't quite hide that
made Kaoru thankful that Kenshin was not in the least interested in the
doctor. "They went herb picking. Dr Genzai sprained his ankle and he
asked Kenshin to follow Megumi." But why hadn't she told Sano?

Why hadn't she told him? He had been to the clinic yesterday as well.
More disturbing was the nagging hurt that he felt. Why hadn't she asked
him to accompany her? Was she really still so desperate for Kenshin or
was this just another prank to make Jou-chan jealous? Sometimes, he
wished he could understand just what was going on in that woman's mind.
She drove him absolutely crazy in every way but he still was confused
about their relationship. Sparks ...sure, chemistry...gads, tonnes of
it. But the more lasting stuff like love, trust ...he didn't know...he
just didn't know.

While Sanosuke tucked his food away with a speed that could rival
Kenshin's Hiten Mitsuryugi Ryu, Kaoru stared moodily at the table. Why
didn't Kenshin tell Sano that he was going out with Megumi? Was he
afraid that Sano would be jealous? Everyone could see that he and the
Fox Doctor were mad about each other. They quibbled all the time. But
Kenshin ...Kenshin just smiled his sweet smile and blinked his huge eyes
and proceeded to 'Kaoru-donno' her to death. He would probably be
'Kaoru-donno-ing' her to the day they were in their eighties and too
feeble to move. She dropped her head onto her folded arms, eyes a stormy
blue. If only she knew what was going on in that rurouni's head, she
could come up with a plan, anything to get them together. But first,
above all she needed to know. She needed to know if he really, really
loved her.

.............................

Kenshin lifted his face to the morning light and thought how much like
Kaoru's touch it was, warm and soft as air yet so tangibly real, just
within his grasp. Quickly he dropped his head. What was he thinking? Why
was he even thinking about it? Kaoru was not his, she would never be
his. When Enishi had been defeated and he had taken her to see Tomoe, or
perhaps to let Tomoe meet her, he had gotten too emotional. Holding her
hand, feeling her walk by his side, not apart but together. Joy, bliss,
and so much light. Later cool thought set in and he wondered how many
more enemies would come his way, whether they would try to take her from
him again, harm her. Didn't he love her? He could love her enough to
stay away. He had left once and she had pursued him. This time, he would
remain by her side but at a distance.

A dewdrop fell from a leaf and the young sapling quivered.

Megumi wisely waited until the clouds lifted from Kenshin's face and
once more, that inscrutable cheerfulness, tinted with just the slightest
sadness came back. "Thinking about Kaoru-san eh, Ken-san?" Expertly she
snapped a branch from a plant with pale purple flowers. Beneath her feet
the smell of fresh soil rose, earthy, sensual. And such a rich ripe
brown. Hastily Megumi brought her thoughts back to Kenshin. 'You know,
you should just try to talk to her. Tell her what's on your mind."

"I could offer you the same advice for your problems with Sano." Wide
amethyst eyes stared back at hers and Megumi grinned.

"Ouch, touché, Ken-san. But unfortunately even if I did speak to that
baka he probably won't understand." Maybe if you tried talking instead
of scolding, she sighed to herself. But the moment she dropped the
'nasty Fox' persona, all her real emotions would shine through and she
would be at the mercy of Sagara Sanosuke. He simply wasn't matured
enough to handle her feelings.

"That's an assumption."

"That's my excuse, Ken-san. And Kaoru is beginning to tire of yours."

Oooh, that smarted. But Megumi was right, although his reasons were not
excuses. Kaoru was beginning to get tired of his reluctance to develop
their relationship. He loved her so much ....but loving him was not
worth the sacrifice. It just wasn't.

When Kenshin merely smiled and became silent, Megumi chuckled aloud and
pursed her lips wryly. "To think I was planning on asking you to help me
with understanding Sano better. But I see now that there isn't any other
way aside from speaking to the baka myself."

"What did you wish to know, Megumi-donno?"

Only things that she wanted Sano to tell her himself, she realised. She
didn't want to hear from Kenshin that Sano was in love with her. She
wanted to hear those words from Sano's lips. Megumi almost licked her
own lips as she conjured up an image of Sano's face. So handsome, so
strong ...and then there was his body ...'Argh, Megumi no hentai!'

"Megumi-donno?" Kenshin asked again when she said nothing.

"Nothing Ken-san. I just wished..." She plucked a flower and held the
pale pink petals up. It glistened silver in the light. She had never
seen its kind before in the mountains or the woods. "I just wished that
I could help you to understand Kaoru-san better."

"I wish I could help you understand Sano better as well," the petite man
smiled sincerely. "Ahh ...but I suppose unless we are able to find a way
to let us speak freely to each other, I'm afraid that our problems will
remain."

"We're just plain chicken Ken-san," Megumi grinned, dropping the flower.
"We don't have the courage to thrash things out face to face with them."

Moving on to more insubstantial and easier subjects, Megumi and Kenshin
continued to hike along the path, picking leaves and herbs randomly.
They laughed and joked, never noticing that the flower which Megumi had
held a moment ago shining like a fallen sunbeam against the dark green
forest brush.

...........................

"Irrashaimese! Gah, it's you." Yahiko dodged the hand that grabbed for
his collar unsuccessfully and was hauled three feet off the ground by
Sanosuke. "Lemme go! One day I'll get too big for you to keep doing that!"

"One day, Yahiko," Sano teased before dropping the boy. "I must say you
look very nice in the apron." He narrowly avoided a kick to the shins.

"Irrashaimese!" A sweet girlish voice greeted them and Yahiko instantly
blushed. His feet scuffed themselves on the floor and the menu was being
steadily twisted into a pile of scrap. He looked every inch the awkward
pre-teen in puppy love. "Here, Yahiko, let me help. You've been working
hard all day." Tsubame appeared at the boy's side and smiled up at the
four adults.

Yahiko let Tsubame escort them to their table, wondering why he always
acted so funnily in front of her when he was with the rest. All day he
had been cool and efficient. "All it takes is for them to show up and I
become a retard," he muttered ruefully, unaware of Tae's fond gaze on him.

'He's just growing up. One day he'll get the gumption to ask Tsubame out
on a real date. At least all this working here will help them to get to
know one another,' she thought to herself. Her gaze slid to her four
...well...three favourite customers and she couldn't help thinking with
disapproval that a little more trust and maturity could help those two
couples. At the rate they were going, Tsubame and Yahiko would be
engaged before them. And both Megumi and Kaoru were positively ancient.
"Kami-sama help them," she muttered before going to take the orders to
the kitchen.

..........................

Dinner went "well". Kenshin made mooneyes at Kaoru when she wasn't
looking and Kaoru just sat there looking sweet and cheerful in the
candlelight while Kenshin was breaking her heart inside. Megumi stabbed
viciously at her sushi rolls before popping them into her mouth. And
Sano? Sano had been irritating the hell out of her. 'Kitsune' this,
'Megitsune' that. When was she ever going to be plain old Megumi to him?
She knew something was bothering him but why couldn't he just tell her
in words? She was tired of games.

"Ooi, don't murder the food kitsune. It's already dead," he smirked and
she really wished that she had been there to see Saitou gatotsu him
through the dojo wall. Although she might have strangled Saitou the next
minute, if she could have at any rate.

"Shut up, Sano."

"Wow, that was smart."

There was something different about tonight's sarcasm. It was meant to
hurt, not just to exasperate. Kenshin listened in concern, watched the
storms gather in Megumi's eyes and almost flinched as they were
unleashed on Sano.

"Sagara Sanosuke," Megumi hissed as she drew herself up, like a queen
towering over a lowly subject. "If you have something to say to me, then
say it. Stop being so childish. When are you ever going to Grow Up?"
With that she flipped her ebony hair and stalked out, the admiring gazes
of many men following her. In her rage she glowed like a lamp in the
dark, the fire that drew moths. Sano would not resist following her.

"Sano! Go after Megumi this instant and apologise!" Kaoru said
worriedly, her wide blue eyes panicked.

'Oh my koishii, always so worried for others'. Yet she cared nothing for
herself. He had to care for her even if she didn't know it.

Sano mumbled something about stubborn fox ladies before slinking out
after Megumi. But not before he gave all those men a good hard look
which told them that they should be looking at their own dinners if they
still wanted to be able to eat.

When he was gone, Kaoru smiled uneasily at Kenshin and he did the same
to her. In silence they both picked up their chopsticks and pretended to
eat. Yahiko, who had watched the whole scene with Tsubame, threw his
hands up in disgust. "Those two are just as hopeless. It'll take a
miracle to help them." Tsubame nodded and quietly followed Yahiko to the
kitchen, glad that their friendship was not fraught with so many perils.

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