Disclaimer: None of the RK characters are mine. Pokemon does not belong to me. I acknowledge all right and privileges of both the aforementioned animes' creators and all companies associated with them. I'm only borrowing. Notes: A piece of sheer nonsense I wrote last year and stowed away somewhere. Decided to upload since I am on a break from "By Any Means Necessary." (Misao, Aoshi and Saitou are killing me...arrgh!) Anyways, I must say that I wrote this after reading another writer's fic on a Pokemon/RK crossover. It used to be on Prico's site but now that it's taken down I cannot find the writer's name! The concept of Team Shishio comes from her/him, although I made up my own pledge. I tried pairing Yumi with Houji but it didn't work as well. Kama-chan is way more fun. Whoever you are Mystery Writer, I acknowledge you as my inspiration and as the source of Team Shishio. BISHONEN ADVENTURES: THE TOKYO LEAGUE EPISODE ONE Voiceover: On a hot dusty day, three ladies are lounging in the comfort of the Aoiya Gym, Kyoto. Just then a flyer flies into the area and lands smack on Genki Trainer, Makimachi Misao. The others, a beautiful lady who is busy sewing a stuffed fox and a pretty girl dressed in a gi and hamaka with printed raccoons on them, wait for her to extract it from her face. Misao: Chikuso! Baka! What is the meaning of this? *Snatches the offending piece into her hand* Megumi: *Biting off the thread * Stop cursing and just read it Weasel. Misao: Who's a weasel!!? *A wooden bokken lands on both their heads* Kaoru: Stop being so infantile. Here, let me read it. "Attention all qualified trainers and masters. The annual Bishonen Tokyo League is in season. Please collect at least five gym badges before proceeding to Tokyo where you will compete in the Bishonen League. Winners will receive an exclusive prize of *eyes bulge out* 100 000 yen! That's enough to support the gym and you two freeloaders! *Kunai and fists fly. We see a calm and haughty Misao dusting herself. Switch to Kaoru who suddenly does look very much like a tanuki around the eye area* Misao: This is not the manga or the series. *proud sniff* In this series I am the one who owns the gym now. Kaoru: Only 'cos your Jiya is out chasing pretty girls younger than you are. Misao: True true. Who do you think told him there was a hot spring spa in Shingetsu where babes rub your back? *evil grin* Now I'm the one who gets this *indicates to the whole inn-cum-Oniwabanshuu HQ* And this. *crazy look of satisfaction complete with hearts and stars as she holds up a blue and white Bishonen Ball (BB)* Megumi and Kaoru sweatdrop. Megumi: *whispers* I think she did it just so she could get that Aoshi all to herself. Kaoru: *whispers back* Yeah, she trains him all the time. Especially really late at night. All kinds of yelps and groans coming from the hall. Megumi: *shouts*But he's only a foot tall! It's not physically possible to have se-- Kaoru: Megumi!! I'm talking about the obstacle course, the fire rings and paper cranes!! Megumi: *turns a beet red* I'm a doctor. My mind is attuned to biological interpretations. Misao: You're not a doctor. You play a doctor in the local weekly soap nahnahnahnah! Megumi: Grrrrr... wait'll I sic my bishonen on you! *grabs her ball* Kaoru: *Steps in with her eyes flaming amber* That's enough you two. Don't make me take out my Bishonen. Megumi: One question. *Kaoru blinks and slowly her eyes fade back to a sparkly blue* Why paper cranes? Misao: It keeps his fingers nimble. Megumi: *mutters* I must remember to teach Sanosuke that method. Ohohoho! *Fox ears* Kaoru & Misao: Eh? What was that? Megumi: *tucks her hands into her kimono sleeves* I said we should hurry and leave now before anyone comes to challenge you for the Onmitsu badge. We can't afford to have you lose before you've started. Misao: WHAT!!! *Kaoru whips out her bokken again* Two hours later, the three ladies are on the road to their first destination, the Gohei Gym. There are beautiful forests on either side of the road and behind there is a fresh smell of bamboo in the air. Kaoru: Must we really go to the Gohei Gym? I have a bad feeling about that place. Misao: Don't worry. I know Gohei has a bad reputation as a despicable gym leader who likes to pretend that he is the Legendary Master of Bishonen, Battousai, but he's just a lot of hot air. I'll beat him with my Aoshi! *throws the BB in the air and catches it neatly* Far, far away in a hot air balloon .... Yumi: Did you see that? *Scans the area with a binoculars* Kamatari: What, what? *Snatches it from Yumi but gets bitchslapped instead* Yumi: *hisses* Always snatching with me. First it was Shishio-sama, then my kimonos, and now my binoculars! *scans the landscape once more* Kuso, we lost them. I saw someone toss a BB into the air. Come on, let's go! Soujiro, move it! Bishonen Soujiro proceeds to run at god-speed on a treadmill hooked up a giant propeller attached to the basket. (Gracey-san: Why a hot air balloon? Soujiro could easily be hooked up to a carriage. *dodges a slap from Kamatari* Kamatari: 'cos anyone seeing Soujiro's friendly face will think we are ambassadors of goodwill! Bwahahahaha! Besides, Jessie and James have one.) Writer sweatdrops. Back to the story. Anyways, unknown to our heroines, two villains are on their way. No, not Bishonen snatching villains but trainer-snatching ones. Allow us to introduce.... Karryu: Stop right there pretty ladies. *tweaks his sunglasses and winks at Megumi* And by pretty ladies I mean those two. *points at Kaoru and Megumi* Not that underdeveloped Genki girl. Misao: *howls and flings kunai, all of which are whipped away by a snake-like sword. Enter Chou* How dare you- Megumi: How dare you insult her bosom! I have been supplying her with homemade breast enhancing creams and it is working! See? *yanks down Misao's top and points with an air of vindication* Eh, Misao-chan? *frowns* You seem to have shrunk two cups. Did you not apply the cream twice a day as I instructed? Or has it stopped working? *alarmed look and checks her own assets* Misao: *weak smile* I was allergic Meg-chan. So instead of discouraging your attempts at helping me, I bought a Triumph Aqua Bra... (mass face-fault, villains included) ....but I was afraid that while battling it might get damaged so I left it at home. Kaoru: *consoling a teary-eyed Megumi* There, there, it isn't you fault. You're a VERY GOOD doctor. *growls at the two villains* Get lost you two. And who are you anyway and what have you been doing to your face*points at Karryu* and hair? *at Chou* Karryu: Why I am insulted. *Takes out a box filled with white powder* Doesn't this smell lovely? Tastes good too but anyways, this is the latest loose powder from M.A.C. All-purpose and very lucrative business I must say. And my name is Karrawasaki Ryuu. So for short, you may call me Karryu. Chou: And I am Chou. And there is nothing wrong with my hair! Megumi: For a broom-head, yeah! And doesn't your name mean 'Ugly' in Chinese? (It really does if you consider the pinyin :P) Chou: *screams* That's it! This is waaaar! *snatches Karryu's BB and tosses it* Jin-e, I choose you! Karryu: I keep telling you his name is Kuragasa! The BB ball opens and in a flash of light a foot tall Jin-e Udo, complete with black hat and greyish skin, stands in the pathway. Chou & Karryu: Jin-e/Kuragasa, DISABLE! The little figure laughs evilly as twin flashes issue from his eyes. The heroines are stunned and helpless. Karryu: Hahahaha! *tweaks his sunglasses again and winks at Megumi* You'll just have to stay with me. Aren't you that actress who plays the doctor on the local soap "Genzai's Hospital"? The only lady doctor too. *lascivious smirk* Chou: And I suppose I'll get the Tanuki. *Jumps back as Kaoru's eyes flame amber but she strains in vain to break the power of Jin-e* What did I say? Misao: And what will happen to me? Chou: *to Karryu* Didn't you have a customer once who bought a whole box of powder for his under-aged girlfriends? Man, that old guy is a perv.! We can sell her to him. Karryu: Hmm, not a bad idea. Unfortunately he told me that he's shifting to Shingetsu where there is a hot spring complete with girls who will rub your back. It'll take quite some time to track him down. (Misao sweats a gigantic sweatdrop. Kaoru and Megumi face-fault) Chou: Well, I want the pretty actress. Megumi: *through clenched teeth* I'm a doctor you broom-head. Kaoru: Yeah, what's wrong with me huh? I'm pretty too. Chou: But the more I look at you, you strike me as a rather funny looking girl. Kinda like a busu tanuki ack--! The insults are more than enough to give Kaoru strength, snapping Jin-e's power. She reaches for her BB and throws, uttering the immortal words.... Kaoru: Kenshin, I choose you! (Brilliant flash of light and an extremely chibi red-haired Bishonen is standing in the road. He sees the black Jin-e and goes bug-eyed.) Kenshin: Oro? *turns to his mistress who is salivating with satisfaction at Chou's imminent destruction* Orororo.... Karryu: Kuragasa, disable! The twin flashes strike Kenshin but the diminutive Bishonen breaks free. His eyes flame to amber and he leaps. Kaoru: Kenshin! Hiten Mitsuryugi Kuzu Ryu Sen!! A blur of red, pink and white streaks forward and the first blow knocks down Jin-e who falls back, cross-eyed. Karryuu and Chou are drowned in a cloud of white dust as Kenshin proceeds to show them what happens to people who insult busu tanukis...ack! I mean, his trainer. Kaoru: Good job Kenshin! *pats him on the head and tugs on his red ponytail. Kenshin purrs and starts blushing* Misao: Hey, help us break out of this too! Kaoru: You need to concentrate your will power. Megumi: Hello, we have been trying to do that. Now come on, figure out a way to help us. You too, Kenshin darling. Kenshin: ORO! Kaoru: Hey! *returns Kenshin to his BB at once* I know! I'll just take this! *snatches Megumi's BB but nothing happens* Err...I'll take this! *grabs the breast cream but Megumi remains frozen* Nani! There's only one thing left in those sleeves. *Reaches for the stuffed fox* I'll take--- Megumi: GET YOUR PAWS OFF MY KITSUNE! *breaks free and stuffs her belongings back in her sleeves* A real doctor gave me that. He was from Aizu too. *hero-worshipping fanatic look* Kaoru: *mutters* You're sick. *walks to Misao* Now, I'll just take that pretty Aoshi gah! *dodges kunai and a rabid Misao who calms down at once* Hey, it worked didn't it???!! Misao & Megumi: Hai, very clever of you, Tanuki-san. Far, far away in a hot air balloon .... Kamatari: Hey, do you see that? That's a huge dust cloud. Yumi: Someone's running up a hot streak on the road. Soujirou: What about me? I'm running up a hot streak here. *is ignored but keeps a determined smile on his face* Yumi: Well *uses her binos* It looks like three women. There's one wearing tanukis chasing another two. They appear to be heading for the Gohei Gym. Kamatari: Well then, let's go! We'll get those Bishonen yet. We'll catch them all for Shishio-sama. Yumi & Kamatari: Bwahahahahaha...... Voiceover: As the three girls run towards the Gohei Gym, they are unaware of the danger that is looming over the horizon, literally. Will Misao get her first badge? (No, she cannot use her own gym badge to pass off you cheats! Yumi & Kamatari: But but but... *are whacked on the head by Gracey-san*) Will they run into more villains? (Soujirou: Well, they are running towards Gohei) Find out in the next episode of Bishonen Adventures: The Tokyo League! ------------------------------------------------------------------------