*

Falling in Love again

*

(A/N: Warnings for language!!! and allusions to sex between men)

**

*Chapter 2: Rock around the clock *

*Tokyo, years 36/37 of Meiji (1905)
*The wind, especially, when he is blowing from the ocean, carrying with
it the scent of far away things, always reminds me of him.
Never said words. Never shared feelings. No, a man at the end of his
life should not lie to himself.
Never admitted feelings.

 

*

New York, May 8, 1965

*

It wasn't one of the names they were looking for, but he interrupted his
research. This name appearing on the passenger list of a flight from
Tokyo recalled a flow of unbidden memories. How many years had it been
that he had lost the traces of this man... But he still felt the
bitterness and the anger of his failure. He had failed to nail this man
once and for all, before he was out of reach for the FBI or the secret
service. Could it be coincidence, that the man came back just now? His
experience had taught him to consider even the strangest indication.

Henry Shatner picked up his phone and dialed a number. His best man.
"Cagney, here is the headquarter. Yes, I know it?s late, but you?re
still awake, like I thought. Would you do me a favor? Yes, I think you
would like it. Can you collect some information about a man called
Kenneth Farrel? F-A-R-R-E-L. An American-Japanese. He arrived from
Japan, April 31, at 14:37. Just find out if there was something special
with his papers or the passage! Alright. 'night!" He dropped the
receiver and smoked silently in the already hazed room. But just for
some minutes. Then he looked at his watch and dialed another, very long,
number.

"Here is Chief Henry Shatner, New York. It's you, Kate? How do you do?
I'm fine too, busy as usual. I would you like to send me the documents
about Farrel. Yes, Kenneth Farrel. I don't know, I just want to be more
careful this time. Prevention is better than cure. What? That is true.
Yes, I would be grateful if you could send me this document too."

***

Arthur's still pissed off, and it's very funny to see him, swallowing
his primal emotions. He wants to beat me senseless, but he doesn't.
Besides, I wouldn't let him do it so easily. So he just kills me with
his eyes while he's sipping some water. Kay and me are drinking beer,
chilling out in the dressing-room. We have already ranged the
instruments in Kay's pick-up. I need a shower, but this is for later.
I?m too lazy to stand up now. I could need some coffee too.

"You shouldn?t have done this." Kay says finally, halfway laying on the
red couch. The well-used red couch. I know that Kay is right. Dancing
with Cutie was not a real good idea, but I wanted him to be as loose as
before. Before he left his place, after Arthur?s sudden awakening.

Arthur! Cutie is exactly this kind of guys fitting in the strange
wonderland where Arthur lives. A land issued of Gothic novels and
symbolist pictures, crowded with unearthly creatures. Sometimes I pity
him a bit, ?cause he doesn?t know how to express his feelings. He?s
unable to say that he wants a guy, or a girl. But most of time it makes
me want to provoke him. And this time I have a fucking good instrument
to provoke him, this time he has manifested his emotions. Cutie ? bright
eyes and flushed face, a girl-like guy with long red hair wearing some
fantasy clothes. I?m quite curious how far Arthur will go if he?s so
obviously interested. However, even without this occasion to tease
Arthur, I think Cutie is worth a check. I grow heady when I imagine, how
amazing it would be to screw him.

Though for the dance, I didn?t think about this. Strangely, I almost
forgot my intention, and I certainly forgot that Maggie was not supposed
to know about me being gay. The only wish I now had, was to bring back
the light and the rapture in his eyes. I feel a bit ridiculous about
such a sentimentality.

The voice of reason calls me back. "Are you listening to me, Sam? You
cannot dance openly with another guy in this club, we had a deal about it."

"Nobody has even noticed." I make just a little effort to justify
myself. "They all thought he were a girl."

Kay sighs. "This is not the point, Sam. You know very well, that we
could have big problems if someone relates the police that the "Velvet"
might be a meeting point for gay people. They would use the occasion for
unexpected raids." This man?s just reasonable, but being reasonable
doesn?t fit to my philosophy. "And you know that they will find some
strange figures. That would be reason enough to close this club."

I pretend a yawn: "Don?t try to frighten me. Besides, I thought Simon?s
friends would protect us. You pay them enough, don?t you, Arthur?"

That?s one of the things, I don?t understand about Arthur. At the first
look, he seems not to be the guy who would pay protection money, but
then Simon and Brian convinced him to do so. Perhaps, they got money
from "the family" for purchasing this theatre and for the repairs.
Sometimes, "the family" was quite generous, offering money or jobs. Easy
money. I did some jobs for them too, but I prefer to stay a freelancer,
caring only for my own business.

"Don?t even dare to mess up with me like this." Arthur says icily. "What
you did was unprofessional. We had an agreement, that, this time, you
would invite Maggie to dance. She?s a good dancer as you know. What
would you have done, if that man had messed it up?"

That was the only risk I took, but, unlike the others, I had heard
Maggie repeating regularly that her "Shin-chan" was a professional
dancer. Nobody could deny it, having seen him dance, the audience had
sensed it. I had to grasp it very clearly. He forced me to be as perfect
as possible, ?cause he?s an extraordinary dancer. It has been a very
long time since I felt so scared. But I will have my revenge, that sweet
little butt, and his cute face will look even cuter, flushed with heat
for me. For me, not for Arthur.

"Stop mocking me, Sam!" Can he read my mind? "Sometimes I think that you
should leave the band, being so irresponsible."

I get angry too. "Stop baiting me, Arthur! What a show would you do
without me, you two? Tame political folk music?" Arthur only snorts
disgusted then he heads for the bathroom. He has promised Brian to play
the DJ after the concert. He doesn?t love dancing anyway. I stand up to
take another beer. "Asshole!"

Kay shakes is head, but he has no right to say one fucking word. He
should have defended me. Expel me from the band? How could this bastard
even dare to make such a suggestion?

"Do you have made plans for tonight?" Kay asks finally. How can he even
ask so stupidly? I don?t answer. Kay smirks. "Perhaps he was just too
confused to refuse your offer. Perhaps he isn?t gay at all."

This is one of the reasons why I like Kay this much: He treats my
preferences as if it were a normal way of life. He jokes about it in the
same way as he jokes about his own sex life. Or as he did, before he
felt desperately for Maggie.

"You mean if he?s bi. Like Arthur." That makes him laugh. He?s laughing
every time I tell him that Arthur is bi. He doesn?t believe me. For him,
Arthur?s just strange and needs some very nice girl to comfort him. "Who
knows? But, to tell the truth, I?m sure that Cutie?s gay at hundred pro.
Besides, he?s already lost to my charm." I continue, and Kay?s grin
becomes more ironic. "Such a sweet thing! Did you see his butt? It?s
delicious to eat. And he?s wearing silver chains around his neck /and/
around his waist. He just cries for my attention with every fucking
movement. No, I know he will beg for it."

While speaking, I note that Kay starts chewing his lower lip, a very odd
expression on his face. Then I?m hit by a handbag, and the beer splashes
over my chest and my pants.

"You should hear yourself, idiot." Maggie?s standing beside my chair,
and again she hits my head with her handbag. I stand up rapidly and
begin to search something to wipe my pants. Maggie goes past me, not
giving me the slightest honor of a look. Not even a disgusted one. "Hi,
Kay! You must have an headache hearing all these stupid words of this
moron. Sorry, that I didn?t believe you about his single leaded mind.
Guess, you won!"

"Hi, Maggie! I?m very glad to win." Kay says, and he?s smiling like an
idiot. Winning what? And why? I have the strange impression to have
missed something in the last weeks. Could it be that they came together
without me noticing? "Would you present us the guest star?"

Traitor! Kay, you fucking bastard, you should have warned me! I spin
around, and there /he/?s, leaning against the doorframe. Eyes partly
hidden behind these fiery red bangs framing his face. So delicate and
sweet, even in the ugly light of the dressing-room. Sweet, sweet Cutie!
I should be ashamed ?cause he must have heard all my chatting, but he
still looks so pretty, by far too cute for his own good. Then he lifts
his head a bit more and smiles. Immediately effective! Arthur chooses
the very same moment to leave the bathroom. I see him swallow but he
regains his posture very fast.

"Hi, Maggie! Nice to meet you, - your name is Farrel isn?t it?" How can
he know this? "My name is Arthur Sherman."

Cutie enters our little circle of embarrassed persons. "Nice to meet you
too! Yes, my name is Kenneth Farrel. I?m Maggie?s brother, kind of."
Kenneth? Why the hell she calls him Shin-chan? He?s very polite and
shakes hand with every one. He?s smiling brightly and innocently, even
when he squeezes my hand. He doesn?t comment my words. Perhaps he?s not
angry at all, ?cause he knows I said the truth.

Kay goes into the bathroom to fresh up, still grinning. He?s in love
with Maggie for two years, but until now, she didn?t manifest any sign
of interest. Who knows how things could change?

"I would like to thank you, Farrel," Arthur, Arthur! He?s looking so
tensed. Obviously, he has problems how to deal with Cutie, being so near
to him. "for having contributed to our show. All your drinks this night
will go on the house."

Cutie laughs a bit, a soft chuckle. "Thank you, but I don?t want to
abuse your generosity." A slight flush taints his cheeks. Surely he
speaks not only about the dance. I like to see him flushing, even if
it?s for some thoughts about Arthur. How to find something to embarrass
you a bit, Cutie?

"Don?t be so modest, Shin-chan!" Thank you, Maggie! This is working. I?m
wondering what he?s thinking about, flushing like this.

"Do as you wish!" Arthur?s shrugging. "Unfortunately, I have to leave
you, please, make yourselves comfortable as long as you are staying."

He leaves, and I see that Maggie wants to leave too. "Come on,
Shin-chan, let?s go dancing! Kay will rejoin us later. Perhaps we will
support the presence of this idiot either."

She rushes by me, the queen of England in persona. But Cutie smiles and
nods. Then he looks at me, rising an eyebrow, while Maggie opens the
door to the hall.

/

Come on, baby, let?s do the twist ...

/

"Would you mind if I let my jacket here?" Cutie asks, accompanied by the
sound of the music. "It?s quite annoying for the dance."

"I don?t mind." I say, waiting for Maggie to depart. Just a few seconds
with Cutie! Just to prepare the later fun! He strips his jacket and lays
it over a chair. I can discern that the body under this loose silk
button shirt?s as nice as the rest. "What do you think?"

"What should I think?" He stands close enough for me to touch him, but
it?s him who touches me first. The fingers of his right hand tab my
chest. So, he?s a naughty little boy and obviously more eager than me to
come to conclusions. My breath grows heavier, and I bite my bottom lip,
as he is running his fingers down to my stomach very slowly and
appreciatively until he reaches my belt. All my blood seems to follow
this similar way. I grip his teasing hand to venture her even lower to
the slight stiffness between my legs. He?s looking straight in my eyes,
lips curved in the most beautiful smile I ever saw at a guy. "What
should I think? You?re just a guy who wet his pants." He frees his hand
easily, with a swift movement, then a not so gently slap hits my
buttocks. "Nice butt! Perhaps it is worth to taste." I don?t know how I
look, but he chuckles amused. After this he leaves me with Kay standing
at the door to the bathroom and grinning.

"Don't say anything, traitor!"

Luckily I can find an extra pant, and I go to take a shower. Very cold!

This fucking little bastard did this on purpose. Why could I not push
him down and show him who truly is the master? Why could he do this to
me, taking me off guard and laughing at me? A man who just reaches to my
shoulders. I could break all his bones if I wanted. Of course, this was
never my intention. I don?t want to take a guy against his will. I never
needed to do this, and I will not start with it now.

But I would have him, and he /would /beg for it. He?s already halfway
beaten, no doubt, ?cause he touched me. And didn?t dislike it at all. I
will find out which other weakness he has. I have my pride, and I will
never lose in such a game. Defeat is for weaklings, and I?m not beaten yet.

Ready for the second round, I take another beer and go in the auditory.
Very fast I have a crowd of excited chicks around me. That means I?m
obliged to please our fans before I can have fun. I beat on the bush a
bit, make them laugh while searching the others with my eyes. But I
can?t see them until most of the people stops to dance heading towards a
fast growing circle.

Voices are chatting around me. "It?s the girl from before. ? But this is
a guy. ? Really, but they did dance together. ? Do you think? ? It?s so
sick. ? disgusting ... ? What a shame? ? Poor Sam ... ? How could he? ?
But this guy can really dance."

What the fuck? I pass through the crowd, and then I can see them. Maggie
and Cutie. Making a fucking dance show. Shit! How can he put me in such
a mess? Now everybody knows that I danced with a guy. People who came
regularly to listen to our concerts. I hope Arthur will never learn
about that. It would take an eternity, before he would cease to piss me
off with this.

Luckily, Arthur does his job, and he chooses some very good songs to
dance. It?s still the Twist session. Perhaps a little out of date for
the younger kids in the crowd, but it suits me. No doubt, it suits Cutie
and Maggie too. Watching them, surrounded by the other dancers, my anger
vanishes. They fit together very good, and I decide not to interfere,
like I wanted to. I?m clever enough to see that I could never match
Cutie at the dance. I would look ridiculous, only giving him a reason to
laugh at me again. Besides, I notice that this dance is supposed to be
for Maggie.

Maggie?s Shin-chan. I know that he?s the most important man in her life.
I?ve known it since her twenty-first birthday, and I have to admit that
I was jealous. Someone can be jealous for a friend as well as for a
lover. Except Kay, Maggie is the best friend, I ever had. It is much fun
to fight with her, teasing and a little bit flirting. During several
month, I even thought, hoped, that she could save me. Yes, save me.
?Cause, there?s this voice in my mind repeating again and again the
words of my parents: "You are damned. You are damned to hell." But even
Maggie could not save me to become hard when I see a guy signaling
"please, fuck me!" with looks or movements. And she will not save /him/
neither. Every move is pure provocation, and I remember that I have to
meditate my new strategy.

I go to the bar with my beer and find Kay.

"You are no match for him, I can tell you." I rise my brow to his sudden
comment. "He?s not like the other guys you picked up. You will never get
him on the back stage couch, nor in the park, nor in a public location,
nor in Arthur?s car."

"Shut up, Kay! Nobody asked for your fucking opinion." I?m getting angry
hearing him talk like this about my activities. Sometimes it would even
be better, if he were less liberal.

Still smiling, he leans over to me: "It?s a bet. He will defeat you
before you even get him."

Kay?s crazy for bets and gambles as much as I am, but betting my success
with a guy?s a new sort of games. Losing would hurt my pride in more
than one sense. Furthermore, Kay doesn?t wait for my reply, and this
time, the big smile?s warning me before the others arrive.

"Got changed?" The chuckling voice comments when Cuties takes a seat at
my side, but I prefer not to answer. Cutie commands whiskey on the
rocks, and for a while he does nothing but looking cute and sipping the
drink. I think it would be a good idea to get him drunk. Just enough
that he would be more relaxed. "You did a great performance. Where did
you learn to sing?"

"What?" I need a minute to realize that he has spoken with me, ?cause I
was just occupied to look at his lips and visioning amazing things he
could do with them. Stupidly, I feel my cheeks burning. I never had what
I was dreaming about. "What did you say?"

But before he can answer, a highly blushing girl comes to ask him for a
dance. I?m quite surprised to see him accept with a very bright smile.
He smiles a lot anyway. I take the opportunity and demand Simon to fill
Cutie?s glass again. Kay pushes his thumb down, hidden from Maggie?s
eyes, and I show him my middle finger.

Of course, Maggie sees my gesture and rises her brow. Then she asks me
for a dance. She doesn?t show any sign of anger. Only her smiles and her
eyes tell me what she thinks. /Idiot, don?t overdo it./

"So, that?s Shin-chan." I can?t refrain myself to say this. "He?s very
cute. Cuter than the photos."

"So, you have an interesting predilection and didn?t tell me about." She
answers mockingly, and for few minutes, embarrassment closes my lips.
"You always mocked Arthur with silly jokes about his penchant. But your
reaction was obviously enough too."

"Arthur is bi." My answer sounds like pouting, and Maggie laughs, but
ceases very quickly.

"It was a funny game until now, Sam, but you will stop chasing him now."

"What? Did he ask you to doing this for him?" What a hypocrite coward!
Hiding himself behind Maggie?s back, playing the innocent.

"Of course not. Don?t be stupid. He?s just generous enough to let you
play your foolish games. And I know he?s far more sensible than you,
idiot. Don?t offend his prudence." Generous? Sensible? Prudence? That
man? Could she be so blind? But, after this night, she will be less
naiv. She will see definitively that Cutie is far more naughtier than
she thinks. Not the man of her life. Just a little, freakish, masculine
slut! I know his kind, oh yes, I had many guys of his sort. They?re just
good for sex.

*

My head aches like hell, and it?s very difficult to open my eyes. My
lids feel so heavy, as if something was laying on them. After a while I
can discern what?s around me ?cause the backstage room?s filled with dim
light. I?m laying on the couch. Unfortunately alone. And I have to
believe that the dance is over ?cause of the silence. I don?t remember
falling asleep, just drinking and having fun with the others. And a
smiling red-head. Oh, yeah, Cutie!

Obviously he didn?t get drunk. Oh yes, I?m remembering now. He cheated,
but it was rather adorable how he did it. He made me drink all his
drinks changing them while I was dancing. It was already too late when I
came to realize it. He laughed this soft, chuckling laughter of his when
I called him cheater. The memory of this laughter creates a warm feeling
in my stomach. Perhaps I need to go piss. Careful not to disturb my
aching head too much, I stand up and go to the bathroom.

Released and a bit refreshed, with brushed teeth, I return in the other
room. I decide to go back to sleep, but then I see that there?s still
light in the theatre. Have they forgotten to cut the light? Usually
Brian or Simon who, every time, leave at least, cut off all the light.
And they let the key for me on the table of the dressing-room. But now
there?s no key. What the fuck?

Slowly, I go on the stage to take a look in the hall. And there ? I
blink few times to force my eyes that they believe what they are seeing.
There he?s, sitting on the edge of the stage. I feel a sudden attack of
expectancy, ?cause he?s still here. With me. And obviously alone.
Whatever reason he might have, weaknesses are not permit in a fight. I
sneak to him, imagining how I will get my victory. After all, a prey who
gives up too easily is not really worthy. But now, I think, time to
surrender?s coming.

"Do you feel better?" This man doesn?t even turn, and his voice makes me
almost jump. Shit happens! I have to reject my first plan, to simply get
him down by surprise. More subtlety then. I settle myself down next to
him, and he scrutinizes me slightly amused like he did before I started
my little game with him. But, by the while, this mischievous light fades
and, finally, he turns his eyes away to look at the ashtray in his
hands. Then he sighs and puts it on the side. "Do you want me to drive
you home? They left the key for you to lock."

Fishing in his pocket, he finds the key of the theatre to give it to me.
His hands are covered with scars. I hadn?t seen it before, and it is so
odd to find this almost perfect being marked like this.

"What happened?"

He follows my gaze.

"Fire."

//

/Not your business./ He doesn?t need to rise his voice or to speak
sharply to warn me.

I shrug, and we sit some time without speaking. I still feel a little
dizzy, and my head aches, but, finally, I find enough reason in me to
wonder.

"Where are the others? And why are you still here?"

"You remember getting drunk?" I snort as an answer. "You pissed Maggie
off that she got really angry with you." Considering the smirk on his
lips and his look, I should be thankful not to know what I did.
Obviously, something stupid and ridiculous. "Kay proposed to drive her
home, and so he did." My mouth is falling open, and Cutie smiles this
bright smile of his which is supposed to be innocent, but isn?t innocent
at all. What a man! One point for Maggie, he?s sensible. I don?t think
that Maggie told him about Kay. He just understood by watching. And he
gave Kay the chance to drive Maggie home, without me to tease him,
without Arthur to sit in heavy, gloomy silence. "And your cousin - "

"He had left. Yeah, it?s not the first time. When he?s angry with me or
pissed off with some mysterious incident, he leaves, leaves without a
word after his DJ shift. Don?t worry about him?"

"Have you never asked where he was going?"

Sweet Cutie isn?t looking cute now. I can?t read the expression on his
face. Sorrow? Sympathy? But I feel anger rushing through my mind. He
shouldn?t think this much about Arthur. Arthur?s no fun at all.

"First, he doesn?t like me spying after him as he has said many times.
Second, he?s searching for inspiration, as he said too." Hey, why do I
need to justify myself? "What?s about you? You didn?t explain why you
are staying here."

"Your friends needed a bit help with cleaning." There?s a really weird
glint in his eyes when he?s saying this words. Fucking shit, I have
never been this drunk to poke. "And I had to meditate anyway."

Now he?s hiding something, I can feel it. But I can?t put the finger on it.

"Meditate? About what? Having sex with me?"

The worst thing to say, buddy. It?s the blink of a second, one flutter
of the eyelid. The sudden change of his eyes almost frightens me. Cold
fury in narrow slits. The color stranger than before. Is that yellow?
Then, abruptly, the scaring look fades, and he smiles apologetically.

He stands up, takes the ashtray and goes backstage. I need some time to
regain my posture. A warning voice in my mind says me not to mess with
this man. But, then I shrug to myself. Obeying the voice of reason? Why
should I? My life should be fun and adventure. Taking some risks just
excites me. I get up too and follow him. Didn?t he say something about
driving me? I?m not so sure. My still hazed mind has limited my
perceptive capacities.

When I enter the dressing-room, he isn?t there, but I can hear the water
running in the bathroom.

"What did you say about driving me?" I shout, while I?m brushing my
hair. I contemplate myself in the mirror. Just cool! Come on, baby, how
can you resist this charming guy?

"Pardon?"

I spin around, and ? Honestly, I can hear in my ears the blood rushing.
The delicate skin of his face is covered by water drops. They are
hanging on his eyelashes like dew in the morning, dripping down his
neck, along the silver chain he?s wearing. And the wet red bangs are
sticking on his cheeks and his forehead like feathers. Accentuating the
soft curves of his features. He must do this on purpose, just to drive
me crazy. Just to make me get fucking poetically. I don?t want to think
fucking poems, I just want to ?

"Why not stay with me?" Rapidly I close the distance between us. "And
have sex with me?"

This time he doesn?t get angry, just rises his eyebrows.

"You are really straightforward, aren?t you?"

"Come on!"

"Why should I?"

He still mocks me, but I will shut his mouth up. Before he knows what?s
happening, I pull him in my arms and search for his lips, trapping him
closely between the door and my body. His taste is exciting, and he
ceases struggling rapidly. Yes! I get it. My senses are enflamed, the
blood rushes faster through my veins. It?s awesome to savor the softness
of his neck and his cheeks under my fingers, still moist from the water.
My thumb stroking his throat, my fingers playing with the chain, rubbing
the metal against the skin, and his lips part slightly. Victory! I take
care just to brush this pliable flesh with my tongue, and relish the
shiver shaking his body.

"?cause, I?m nice and cool and witty and sexy." My voice is low and raw,
when I break the kiss for a moment.

"Shut up!"

A resolute hand grips my neck, and his mouth claims me back. What the
fuck? Immediately, my back is covering with goose-bumps. First slowly,
then more demanding he conquers my mouth with tongue, lips and teeth,
brushing them, suckling my bottom lip, exploring me hungry, and very
conscious of his actions. Breath is trapped in my throat ... shit!
Furious need overwhelms me, hearing sounds of contentment escaping his
mouth, appreciating his tight brushing the inner side of mine, brushing
more privy places. My hands wander to the small of his back, then lower
to his rear end. Just give it to me! Now. Immediately. I squeeze his
buttocks not too gently, but he?s not as fragile as he looks anyway.

I feel losing control about this situation, even pushing tightly against
him, even making him sense my need. It?s not me who controls this
situation, submitted helplessly to sensations like flashlights,
prickling over my skin. The gently massaging hand at my neck finds and
touches places clearly connected with the part of my body he brushes so
torturing slowly with his tight. The other hand creeps over my chest,
teasing pinches provoke helpless shivers all over my body. I?m
frightened and incredibly excited at the same moment. Slowly, savoring,
this hand continues its travel over my body until it reaches my ass,
squeezing it lightly. He knows better tortures. It?s just the thumb who
strokes softly the skin above my pants, then he grazes it with his nail.
How did he find this place? Against my will, I?m arching against him
under his touch, my own grip around his buttocks growing harder. And I
can barely breath.

His lips break off my mouth. Only to wander over my cheek to my ear, his
breath caressing the skin. "I will consider it." He is whispering in my
ear, tickling it with the tip of his tongue, sending me moaning in sweet
and torturous pleasure. Oh god! I feel the firmness of the wall in my
back. When and how did he turn me around?_ _

Finally, he lets me go.

A lazy smile lightens his face when he pushes me away, gently. He just
breathes a bit faster than before. Fucking shit! My legs feel like
jelly. I?ve never been kissed like that. Never this aggressively. I lean
myself against the wall, struggling with my breath and the heat in my
body. I see him looking at me with concern. Compassion is his weakness.
No weakness is permitted in a fight.

"It?s very easy. I want it, and you want it. So, stop being so
coquettish, Cutie!" I say as steadily as my husky voice permits.

"Look, Sam! You have gained a minimal chance that I would consider it."
He shows me with his fingers how minimal this chance was. One
centimeter! "But this chance will pass like this," He snaps with the
same fingers. "if you call me that a second time. Because you are a nice
guy, I tell you that nicknames related to ?sweet?, ?cute? or ?lady? piss
me off. Really!"

There is no sharpness in his voice, but the warning is obvious.

"How you want me to call you? Shin-chan? Kenneth? /Kenny?/ You have
quite many names."

He grins at me, then I see a soft light in his eyes.

"Shin-chan is a children?s pet name for Shintaro. It?s my Japanese name.
You can call me as you like, just use a name."

We stay silent for a few moments.

"Well! What did you say about driving me, - Shintaro?"

"Yes, if you want I could get you home. Maggie has left me her car."

The red Chevy? "The red Chevy?"

He smiles knowingly. "I needed much charm to convince her. She is quite
obsessive with this car."

"I know." After turned off the light in the backstage room, we go
through the hall to the exit. "Hey, I have a great idea. Why don?t you
let me drive this car until my house? Then you can drive all the way to
Brooklyn."

Even in the weak light I perceive that he musters me amused, then he
bursts in this ? unsupportable! ? chuckling laughter.

"Thank you for your offer, but I?m not this desperate to die."

"Hey, I?m not drunk anymore."

"I have no doubt, but you /were/ drunk enough not to be able to drive."

"My ability to recover is unbeatable."

"You are surely right. But I would never confine my security in the
hands of someone who, just one hour before, vomited in Maggie?s lap."
Thank you very much! It was not necessary to say it loudly. "This was
rude. I?m sorry, but I think it might be safer if I would drive."

We have reached the exit now. I have turned all lights off and lock the
door. Shintaro is yawning and rolls his shoulders back while he takes
some steps on the sidewalk. Why has he to be so fucking sensuously?

"Why did you say, your name?s Kenneth Farrel?"

He shrugs heading quickly to the red Chevy parked ten meters away.

"It?s my American name. My father came from this country."

There is a voice in my mind warning me, but ? "What?s the matter with him?"

"My parents are dead."

Great! I should have remembered. Maggie told me that he had lived with
his aunt ? this interesting woman we all, especially Kay, esteem very
highly. Of course! They have the same eyes.

"Don?t worry! Get in!" He has opened the door from inside, and I set
down on the passenger seat. A delightful smile crosses Shintaro?s face
when he turns on the motor. "Where is it?"

"Broome Street."

"Okay."

*

He drives very fast and adventurously. Of course, he chooses the false
way, but I don?t open my mouth. If he doesn?t want my help, no problem.
It would not be my fault, if he gets lost. We turn right and left and
right and left, crossing the Avenue of the Americas and the 7th Avenue.

"Are you pouting?"

"What?" I almost jerk off my seat.

"You haven?t said a word for," He?s looking his watch. "five minutes."

"How late is it?" Just to prove him, that I?m not /pouting/. Girls pout.

"Almost three in the morning."

No wonder that the streets are a bit emptier. This is the quietest time
in the night. Only the creatures of the night fill the streets. Ah, no!
?Creatures of the night? reminds me of Arthur.

"It?s strange. Besides some stores, the street hasn?t changed very
much." The dreamy voice of my companion pierces my thoughts, and I
realize that he has reduced the speed of the car. He signs an
insignificant, dark building. "We?ve lived in this house for six years.
Well," He laughs quietly. "this will be the end of the nightly
sightseeing tour. I just wanted to see it."

I feel stupid, and the next vigorous move of the car presses me deeper
in the seat.

"You could have said it earlier."

"What?"

"Stop mocking me! You could have said, that you know this corner of the
city."

The strange, violet eyes are blinking surprised. "I?m sorry, I had no
intention to tease you. I thought you knew it from Maggie."

"Why should I ask her about your biography?"

What will you say now, um?

The amused smile is back, when he glances at me from the corner of his eyes.

"Is that supposed to be a bait?"

"You ?"

"Wait a minute!" Lifting his right hand, he interrupts me sharply before
I even know what I will say. One more time, the abrupt change of
behavior and facial expression bewilders me. Suddenly he?s braking hard
and stops the car. Opening the door and rising up, he shouts at the top
of his voice. "Hey, you! Get off these girls!"

It?s just now that I see the reason for his behavior. A bunch of thugs
is fighting with two girls on the other side of the street, trying to
drag them in a dark space between two houses. And of course, no one is
around to help them. Why are the streets always so empty when things
like this are happen? Of course, the brawler ignore his yell._ _

"Fine! As you like!" I hear him growling and leave the car either. The
tension in his body and the tone of the voice tell me that he will do
something stupid. I just detect a silvery flash and metallic clanking,
before he starts running. He?s very fast. Swearing under my breath I
follow him.

The girls are quite courageous, using her handbags and ? shoes? ? as
weapons, but against six men they would not endure very long. Such
things are happening every night and every day in this city. After a
while, it becomes safer not to see it anymore. Besides, nobody can be
saved in this world. The only good thing?s having fun as long as you can
get him. Unfortunately for the thugs, a good fight?s just fun for me.

"I have asked you to leave this girls alone." Shintaro shouts a second
time. The thugs turn around, facing him laughing. "It?s a warning to
prevent useless hurts."

He seems to be quite naive. Of course, they don?t take him seriously.

Oh!

They should have.

The first man attacking him, a tall, but lanky guy, is down before he
really understands what happens. Just with a precise kick in the guts
and a punch against the neck from my strange companion. Then silver
flashes against the neck of the next, while I?m confronted with a heavy
big guy. He looks somewhat familiar to me, but, with just a few
streetlights, it?s difficult to discern details of his physiognomy. And
besides, it?s no use to care about this, ?cause I get him down very
quickly. He?s just an ordinary thug who had never done prize boxing.

Looking around, I see only two of the gang left standing up. Obviously,
they realize the sudden change of balance in this fight and prepare to
make a dash. I don?t know if it?s for the late hour or for the rest of
drunkenness in my blood, but I?m a bit too slow as the man next to me
holds suddenly a knife in his hand. A quick move, one of the girls is
screaming, and then I get him at the same moment as he?s hit across the
face by ? a silver chain. He collapses and the last standing man?s
already disappeared in the darkness of the night.

With a soft clanking, the chain is falling down on the street. Shintaro
turns to the hurt girl ? a pretty, young lady in well worn clothes ?
which has clutched her right hand over the left arm. He?s not even
breathless and is still wearing his cap, as if nothing had happened.

"Quickly, miss ? Oh, Miss Karen?" For a second, his voice sounds really
surprised. "Well, quickly, we should not stay in this dark corner."

"It?s not so bad, it?s only the arm." The girl says, and it?s just now,
that the shock of the pain?s hitting her. Shintaro grips her, before
she?s falling down. Carefully, he picks her up to carry her to the car.
Apparently, Shintaro knows the little miss. I follow them more slowly,
picking up the chain on the way. Very interesting. The weight?s not as
light as if the fabric was just silver. I let it slide in the pocket of
my jacket.

"Hey, you will certainly not take advantage of her situation!" The other
girl yells and punches him in the back. She?s a small, black girl with a
lot of braids around the head. As much as I can see, she?s wearing a
large dark cloak.

Funny situation! I want to laugh, but instead, I clutch the cloak by the
collar and lift up the little thing. She tries to hit me with her shoes.
High heels.

"Unfortunately, we have not much time to discuss now." I say dodging her
blows and trying to get her away from the dark place we are. "Besides,
we have rescued you. How you can you doubt our sincerity?"

"I would never trust a white man." She answers without ceasing her
struggling.

"I?m not this white."

I hear that she takes a deep breath, but we are already arrived at the
car. Shintaro has set the wounded girl on the passenger seat. She only
seems to be a little dizzy, but hasn?t lost her conscience nor her
temper, because I can hear her explaining: "No, I don?t need to go to
the Hospital."

"Sure." Shintaro helps her out of her jacket, the cut rather nasty,
bleeding profusely.

"You are so stubborn, Karen!" I have deposited my burden, and she?s
putting on her shoes, complaining loudly. "How often I told you that I?m
used to take care of myself? I don?t need a bodyguard. Now see, what
happened to you!"

I think it?s very good that she?s yelling like that, ?cause the little
missy in the car gets a bit angry. "You could be more grateful." She
replies. "You could have been hurt severely, if I had not been here."
Sometimes anger is good to regain vigor.

I change a look with Shintaro. He has gone to the trunk, searching for
the medicine box, and when he?s coming back now, sorrow and amusement
are struggling on his features.

"Would you have an eye on these thugs!" He asks me before crouching
beside the car. Turning around, I witness the men rising up slowly, but
they prefer to stay safe instead to mess up with us another time.
Looking down at him as he treats the wound with calm hands almost makes
me wish I would be wounded too. "Perhaps, we should have called the
police." He says suddenly very thoughtful.

No use, if someone might want to know my opinion. They would just note
our names, ask the girls what the heck they did at a time like this in
the streets. I would never trust one single policeman. Besides, my name
is already registered.

"No!" The reaction of both girls is identical.

Shintaro shrugs, and I believe, he hasn?t much trust in the police
either. It was just a conventional suggestion.

Finally, he has finished his treatment and rises up to put away the
medicine box.

"Okay, lets go!"

Whatever you want, my dear! I open the back door to settle myself behind
the driver seat.

"Hey, where will you drag her?" Mimi punches him again, this time she
chooses his side as her target. "We don?t even know your name."

"Don?t worry, Mimi! We ?"

"First, my name is Kenneth Farrel." Shintaro interrupts a possible
argument between the girls. "Second, the wound needs to be stitched, and
the hospital is not very far away."

"I don?t need to go to the hospital!"

"I will not let her go alone with two men."

Shintaro is sighing. "Of course, you will accompany us and if you want I
can drive you home later too."

The black girl steps a bit back.

"I don?t think that you want to drive to Harlem in the middle of the
night." She says quite aggressively. "Besides, I don?t need any help
from your part, I can take care of myself."

"Don?t be so stubborn!" Although her blood lost, the little miss has
obviously enough energy to yell, but it?s no use.

"I don?t need your help." Mimi is shouting back, and I wonder how often
they had such a discussion.

Annoying girls! Loud girls! I wish Maggie would be here. She is always
able to deal with awkward girls. But, now, they are Shintaro?s problem.
He wanted to save them. The hero who saves the damsels has to deal with
them, not his loyal companion. It?s always like that, in the movies.

"Stop!" /He/ doesn?t even need to rise his voice, as sharply as his
tone?s now. "It?s out of question to let you alone now, Miss Mimi. I can
understand, that you hesitate to trust us. But I promise you that I
simply want to help you. I don?t mind to drive you to Harlem. I have no
doubt, that you are a tough girl, but you will not stay alone now,
because, in a few minutes, you might collapse for the shock. Get in the
car, please!"

The girl gapes, but then she does as he said. I think she knows that
he?s right. Now, she?s still excited from the fight, but when the
adrenaline rush?s over, it will be harsh to deal with this knowledge: It
was just luck, that she escaped the danger of being raped and - probably
murdered.

"Isn?t it a bit late for two girls to be in the streets?" Shintaro asks
when we are sitting in the car.

"One has to gain money, red-head." The black girl says somewhat
offensively. I find myself thinking that they are quite young for being
prostitutes.

"We work in a Jazz Club at the corner." The missy explains with a weak
voice, and against my will, I feel blushing. "Her name is Mimi Melville,
she?s the piano player. I work there as a waitress." There?s a hint of
bitterness in her voice. But, it fades quickly when she speaks with the
black girl. "There is no need to be aggressive, Mimi. He is a very old
acquaintance."

"My name?s Sam Sherman." If it?s time for social conventions, I want to
present myself too.

Shintaro is parking the car, near the Vincent Hospital and leads the
I-don?t-need-any-help complaining missy to the Emergency entrance. As
I?m following him, the black girl tugs my jacket.

"Are you related in whatever way to a man called Arthur Sherman?" She is
asking, grinning like a Cheshire cat. I watch how Shintaro and the missy
are dealing with a sanitary. Then I see the coffee machine. Yes, coffee
would be fine, I think, inserting some coins. "Hey, answer me when I ask
you something." Mimi?s voice is growing louder.

The machine spits out a thin brown liquid supposed to be coffee and
tasting like ? well, nothing delightful. Finally I say calmly: "Arthur
is my cousin."

"Yippie!!!" She?s shrieking so loudly that I?ve to grimace. But, not
only me. The other people waiting for someone to treat them, or for the
doctor, or for whatever almost jump off her seats. And they are as
surprised as me when she is hugging me enthusiastically. Shintaro who
has joined us at the coffee machine is even smiling, the first time
since we have meet the girls. "You are blessed by god. He is such a
great man, a genius. I love him. He took care of me and the gang. He
taught me playing the piano ..."

"Yes, he has a life beyond the music," I interrupt her babble when I see
Shintaro rising an asking eyebrow. "he?s a social worker."

"In Harlem?"

"Oh yes, he is the most courageous man." Mimi doesn?t let any time for a
reply. "It?s not usual for a white man to be esteemed in Harlem." The
hint of serious thoughts fades quickly. "He taught me music, he taught
us, me and the gang, how to promote our Jazz band - Unfortunately, the
others left the band, and a girl alone cannot be a band. ? Ah, it?s such
a pity that I have to work every Friday. I would die to see one of his
concerts one time. ? It?s quite a long time, that I haven?t seen him. ..."

She?s babbling and babbling, switching from regret to excitement.
Complaining that she hadn?t seen Arthur for many weeks, praising his
extraordinary talents. I stop listening, settle myself on a chair and
observe Shintaro. He is going to a phone, tries to call someone and
returns. An irritated expression on his face. He leans against the wall,
facing me. Thoughtful looks and a sad, little smile around the lips,
when he becomes aware of me observing him. Wonderful! I just wanted to
screw him, and now I?m sitting in an Hospital, beside a girl annoying me
to death with praises of Arthur. King Arthur, she calls him. Ha!

Finally, Karen Kaszowiz comes back, the left arm in a slung, her legs a
bit wobbling, but she smiles brightly, when she is noticing us waiting
for her.

*

"What?s about your family, Miss Karen? I couldn?t join anyone. How can
it be, that they let you work this late in the night?"

Shintaro is asking when we go to the exit of the Emergency, all
formalities finished. That?s what is troubling him. He has tried to call
her home wherever it might be.

"We live alone now, my brother and me." The girl tries to sound cheerful
and optimistic, but her face is very pale. "He?s almost twelve years
old. Sometimes, he doesn?t hear the phone when he is sleeping."

None of us ? Mimi included ? finds words to say when we go to the car. I
feel somewhat sorry for her, but shit happens in all families. And
sometimes children have to grow up fast. For some reason, Shintaro
appears to be very distressed. I can see it in his face, reflected by
the mirror.

*

"Nice shack!" I remark just to say something when we climb the stairs.
The shack?s pretty high, but it?s a shack anyway. Ugly and dirty, and
the fucking elevator isn?t working. Fucking Samaritans as we are, we are
scaling the whole fucking stairway with her to the last floor. The 6th
floor.

This last floor?s a bit nicer than the rest. Dark-green paper on the
walls, and we look directly in a gold-framed mirror when we?re leaving
the staircase. An old engraving announcing the "Kaszovic Dance School"
is visible on the left door, and the same name?s standing on the other
door.

The missy manages just to unlock the door, before she collapses tired
from the long ascension. I can catch her, before she falls on the floor,
and Shintaro luckily finds a lighter in the apartment. The little hall?s
very comfortable and nice with a wooden hat-stand, more mirrors and old
furniture. But the best thing?s a couch where I can lay down the girl
who?s blushing, embarrassed about her condition.

"Do you have some whisky?" Mimi asks. "It might help you to find sleep
quickly."

"No, we have no alcohol in the house. Don?t worry about me. I will be
fine." The little missy tries to sound vigorously, but she?s looking
quite tired.

"You should visit a doctor tomorrow. Just to see, if the wound is
healing without complications." Shintaro tells her calmly. "Do you have
someone to look after you? Besides your brother."

"Don?t worry. I?ve been taking care of myself for one year." The girl
replies stubbornly. "I will be fine. Besides, you should remember that
you went to Europe at the age of fifteen, all alone."

Interesting. He had left home almost at the same age as me. Obviously,
the girl has a point with this argument. "Okay, but it would be better - "

"You could be more quiet, raccoon!" One of the doors has opened and the
sleepy face of a dark-haired boy appears in the frame. Slowly, his mouth
is falling open in complete stupefaction, when he is looking at us.
"What are all these people doing here? Are you crazy, or what?"

Little boy with a big mouth. "Shrimp!" Mimi?s thundering, slapping him
on his head. I had the same intention, but the girl?s faster than a
weasel. "Don?t speak like that with your sister!"

"Hey, hey!" Shintaro grips her collar in the same way like I did before,
transferring her with a swift movement away from the boy. "It?s no use.
Look, kid!"

"I?m not a kid!" The boy is yelling back. Yeah, it?s yelling day today.

"Whatever! My name is Kenneth Farrel. Your sister has been attacked in
the streets tonight."

"I can speak for my own." Of course! The discussion gets really funny
now with another reply of the missy.

"I?m sure. Sorry, Miss Karen!"

The missy is sitting up on the couch. I?m still amazed what effects
anger has on her physical condition. "These men have helped me and the
other girl, Yacko. They are brave and reliable." She explains her
brother who tries to hide his concern. Futile effort! "Besides, Kenneth
Farrel was a student of grand-ma."

The boy doesn?t look more impressed, and Shintaro seems to be rather
ashamed at this statement. Softly he says: "I think, we should leave now
and drive miss Mimi home, ?cause you need rest, Miss Karen." We do as he
proposes, and the boy accompanies us to the door.

Some minutes later, we are sitting in the car again. I feel fucking
angry, ?cause the silly little weasel-girl has picked my place at the
driver?s side. But then I think, that I prefer her annoying him instead me.

"Did you really study dancing?" She starts chatting, right after the
start of the car. "I mean, this is a queer sport. It isn?t even a real
sport. You are just hopping around."

It?s me who takes a deep breath hearing her pronouncing the word
?queer?. Shintaro stays completely calm, there is even a slight smile on
his lips.

"Have you ever seen a dance show?"

"No, I didn?t want to sacrifice my money for such silly things."

"Then judge after looking!"

"You are quite rude."

"Do you think so? What?s about you, Miss Mimi? Travelling through the
entire city to play in a Jazz Club isn?t normal for a young girl."

"I?m seventeen!" The girl slaps his arm, and I can see Shintaro?s smile
growing more amused. "But I will tell you. I wanted to be as near as
possible to King Arthur." She sighs dramatically. "Every day, before I
start my shift, I take a look in the "Velvet", but he never shows up."

Arthur?s not sociable at all, he never is visible in the "Velvet" apart
the rehearses and the concerts. I could tell her where she might find
him, but I don?t want to be the target of Arthur praises a second time.
Unfortunately, I had forgotten that she knew already about my relation
with him. She turns around and looks at me, almost hanging between the
seats.

"You will tell him, that I search him. You will tell me, where I can
find him. It?s so great that I?m knowing you now, Rooster."

"What?" I cry out and grip her arm. How dares she call me?

"Would you please return to your seat, Miss Mimi?" The red-haired
traitor has problems to swallow his laughter, and he flashes me a glance
through the mirror. I?m swaying between anger and excitement, but I
start to love the mirror. Weasel-Mimi is obeying, and Shintaro takes up
the further conversation again. "And this is the only reason you play in
this club? You should have asked for a job in the "Velvet"."

"Don?t think I?m stupid. I asked this guy, Brian Reynolds, for a job: He
is not only a fucking racist, but the "Velvet" has no piano either."
That Brian might be a racist is really new for me. I never had problems
with him, he?s very calm, almost a bit shy. Maybe, I should question him
a little about the girl. As short tempered as she?s, she could be
offended by something meaningless. "The piano is important, because I
have to train myself as good as possible. I want to enter the Manhattan
School of Music, but I need more exercise and money for it. The
examination will be in July."

"What other instruments do you play?"

"Trumpet and guitar, but I sing too." And then she suddenly starts to
imitate Judy Garland: "/Somewhere over the rainbow .../"

Normally, I would be ashamed in company of such a foolish girl like her,
singing in a car, but I?m absolutely amazed by her voice and its
capacities. After the second couplet, Judy Garland becomes Shirley
Bassey, singing "Goldfinger". Arthur is the greatest idiot on earth, I
think. Every time, he tells us, that we needed a forth person for the
band. How could he not ask this girl? Hadn?t she spoken about a jazz
band? "The gang"? Arthur?s strange fellows. I knew those guys, but I
never thought they may be able to make music. How could Arthur be so stupid?

"That was great." Shintaro whispers enthusiastically, when she?s ending
her singing, suddenly blushing. "Where did you learn it? Don?t tell me
that it?s just natural talent."

She?s laughing cheerfully. "You?re right, I got a little formation by
our choirmaster. I have sung in the church since my childhood, and I was
even leading singer for the prayer."

"Sam has a good voice too. I think your voices would fit together very
finely."

Our eyes cross in the mirror again, and he smiles warmly at me. He
really means what he has said. I feel stupid, that this thought fills me
with such gladness, but I can?t fucking help myself.

"The rooster?"

I grip her neck from behind, and she shrieks, still laughing.

"Shut up, weasel!"

"Hey, hey." Shintaro reaches over with one hand to free her. I give up,
?cause his hand brushing mine sends a tingle through my body, rising my
hairs and covering my back with goose-bumps. "No, really, he?s the true
star of this rock band."

I could kiss him for this words, but I will not sing to prove her.
Never. Not in a fucking car.

*

The streets are bathed in gray light. The are really crowded now, with
cars and people. It?s 5:30 in the morning. When Mimi finally tells us to
let her get out at the next corner, we have performed in the little car
theatre several songs and duets. I?ve never felt that childish for very
long time. But the two others respectively corrupted my rational thought
with jokes and flirting looks.

"Do you live here, Miss Mimi?" Shintaro asks when he has stopped the car.

"Not directly, but I will be fine. You should better not go to my house
with this car." She?s opening the door and continues with her
light-hearted innocence. "Besides, they don?t like queers in the corner
of the city, and don?t give me wrong, but your looks are just crying
queer." It sounds like an equivalent term for coward, sick and weird in
the same time. Shintaro?s knuckles are turning white, but there is no
disturbed emotion on his face. The girl doesn?t realize the effects of
her words, she is still smiling cheerfully. Ha, I think, she doesn?t
even know what she is saying ?cause she gently taps his arm. "However,
I?m grateful for this travel. You were right, it was better not to be
alone, but now, I?m almost home, and I will be fine. So, thank you!" She
gets out, then glances at me, grinning a bit more shyly. "Don?t forget
about Arthur!"

While we are following her hopping steps with our eyes, Shintaro lets
the steering-wheel go. Looking his watch, he leans his head back and
sighs heavily.

"She is just stupid."

"What?"

"This girl, she is speaking without thinking."

Shintaro shakes his head. "I don?t care about that, - well not too much.
Please, don?t bother with anger. Besides, I don?t think she is stupid.
At least, she is right about many things. Being black /and/ gay might be
harsher than being gay and looking like a woman." My heartbeat must have
stopped for a second. The feeling emerging inside me strangles my
throat, nearly chokes me and makes my eyes burn with unshed tears. Oh
god! No, no, no one will see me cry, never in my ? My cool-blooded mood
returns in an instant, Shintaro is turning around a bit, facing me
smiling. But he perceives my inner struggle. The smile grows softer and
warmer. "Do you still want to drive this car?"

"How can you even ask?" I reply as relaxed as I can.

"I ask, because I have just reached my physical limit."

"But it was you who wanted to help this girls. The hero is supposed to
be untiring."

Now, he is laughing, climbing on the passenger seat. "Come on, it?s your
dream car!" Feeling much better, I leave the car to settle myself on the
driver seat. I?m a bit tired too, but I would never admit it. "You
should be satisfied for having reached one of your goals in this night."

Startled to hear such naughty comments from him, I pick him with one
finger in his side, provoking a gasping laughter and a writhing
movement. /He?s ticklish/. A major weakness! Very satisfied with my
discovery, I start the car. After a while, I can realize that he?s
really wearied, ?cause he pulls off his cap without caring about his
hair arrangement and rubs his frowned forehead. Then he leans back his
head, eyes closed.

A little bit later, I note that he?s fallen asleep. Looking so fucking
cute that I need all my strength of will to concentrate on the road.

*

I find a spot to park before Helen Richard?s drugstore. Yawning I turn
my gaze to Shintaro. He has sunken deeper in his seat, and his head is
leaning against the window cupped in the right hand. The other is
clutching the cap in his lap. Calm breathes lifting his chest in regular
motion. Peaceful and sweet his sleeping face. A few long bangs have left
the artistic creation of his hair, falling down over his shoulder.
Fiery-golden silk on dark-blue velvet. I reach over to savor their
texture, thinking how amazing he must look wearing them all down. I have
a certain attraction to queens, and he would be a good one.

Touching him is enough to rebuild slight need, but I know, that, for
this time, my chance is gone. I would not really profit of this occasion
as tired as I?m now.

Sighing, I shake his shoulder to wake him up. First, he puts out some
funny, whining sounds of unhappiness, which makes me laugh. And I relish
the satisfaction being the one who laughs.

"What are you laughing at?" He queries me, rubbing his sleepy eyes and
stretching. Well, when he?s stretching, I almost forget my thought about
weariness.

"Nothing. What now? You could stay for ? sleeping."

"No," His answer is deciding, but ? Is that a hint of regret I hear?
"They will be very worried about me, if I?m not back, before they
awake." He continues yawning, but, suddenly, he opens the door. "Could
you wait a moment?" I nod, and he leaves the car for the drugstore.
Slowly, I get out too, and leaning my arms on the roof, I wait for his
return. When Shintaro comes back, he?s waving a coke can. "Short time
remedy." He explains, opening the can, and he drinks, standing at my
side. "Want some too?"

I take the can from his hand and have a drink too, to swallow my renewed
urge. He gets in the car and takes a look in the mirror. Sighing, he
starts to adjust a bit his hair, before putting his cap back.

Then he turns on the motor.

"I would like when we go out again one of these days. I hadn?t been in
the city since more than six years, I?m not up to date where people are
meeting usually."

He?s speaking of gay people, but he doesn?t wait for my answer. It was
just a proposition to have a reason to meet again. Just for fun! Yes, I
could tell him about our Saturday night sessions and the "Underground",
where everyone ? really everyone ? is accepted. Our little illegal club.

"We will see." I answer indecisively, because I don?t know if I want to
continue this game. Although he is an interesting target, he causes me
more trouble than I wish to have. All what I want is great sex without
obligation, not a complicated relation.

"Okay." He shrugs, but doesn?t look angry or offended when he starts the
car. "See you!"

My eyes follow the car until he turns right to the Broadway, and I feel
grinning. Yes, I?m somewhat proud of myself. If he is interested, he
will come on his own. What a wonderful idea! I could still win my bet
with Kay /and/ preserve my pride.

After all, I still have his chain in the pocket of my jacket. Maybe, he
would miss it.

 

*

Author's notes:

*

1. Let?s talk about the characters and the biggest change! I know that I
changed Misao?s appearance a lot, and I hope you will me forgive this
liberty. I had several reasons for this. First, I thought that giving
her a difficult social background could show her wonderful character
better, because a person who stays cheerful and full of energy even if
her life isn?t so easy seems very interesting too me. I have read so
many fiction where Misao is just the type "crazy, silly girl", that I
thought she deserved better. Second, the differences of skin color and
the problems of racism will give more impact to the conflicts.

2. Let?s talk about the characters (II)! Sam is very single-minded and
superficially, you think. Yes, you are right, and this is my version of
the "Zanza" character. One of the major plot lines of part one is my
(transported) version of the fight Kenshin vs. Sano. I don?t want to say
more, because I risk to spoil my story.

3. Let?s talk about the characters (III)! The name of the hero: Shintaro
= Shinta (shin = heart/ ta = great/big) + ro (explicit masculine ending
form for a name). For reason which will be revealed later in the story,
it is out of question that his parents wanted to name him "Heart of the
Sword". And I considered Shinta as too soft. The idea giving my
character a Western name and a Japanese name I got from "Fake".

Other characters: I think there is no need to say who Yacko is. This
name is a pet form for Yakub Kaszowiz. Brian Reynolds is an OC, but he
can be compared with the side characters of the manga/anime who,
sometimes, don?t have names.

4. Let?s talk about New York!

**

*Topography:* The Vincent Hospital is located in the Northern part of
Greenwich Village.

Do I need to explain Harlem?

**

*Lifestyle:* "queen" means "drag queen" = transvestite.

"Velvet and Blue-jean" and "Underground" = the names of the two clubs
are a joke, giving my impression of the music they play. "Velvet
Underground" was an avant-garde band (first record in ?67) promoted by
Andy Warhol.

5. Let?s talk about movies: Movies and allusions to them will play a
great role in this story.

"Goldfinger" is the 1963 James-Bond-movie, starring Sean Connery and
Gerd Fröbe. As it has been said, the song has been performed by Shirley
Bassey.

"Somewhere over the rainbow" is a song from the movie "The Wizard of
Oz", starring and performance of the song by Judy Garland. In one of my
sources about gay lifestyle in New York, I read that Judy Garland had
been an idol especially for "queens" in this time.

Revised: 30-11-2002

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