Author's notes:
In these chapters I will tell the happenings between the chapter 'Battlefields 
2' and 'Reflections' of the story 'Saitou Tokio. A life.' I am still struggling 
with myself if I should post this as an 'extra' story or not, but for now I 
decided to upload it behind the original story =^^=. I think it belongs to the 
character-design there and I think to understand these following chapters you 
have to read the other story. Please note that there will be a 
character-development during these chapters as well.
I will rewrite the ending of 'Battlefields 2' a little bit, they won't set off 
for Osaka then, they will move to another Shinsen-gumi house in Kyoto. I decided 
to stick closer to history (but not too close =^^=). 
I'm not sure, but this one here might be six or seven chapters long. Maybe I'll 
continue this till they both die, I have no idea yet. 
To the lemons: I'm considering to write one...not sure yet. Oh, I highly 
recommend to re-check the first lemon, I rewrote it (longer now) =^^=. 
I realised that translating bluntly from German to English does not work and 
that I have to invest more work here. It really broke my heart, because this fic 
was some kind of a 'baby' for me *SNIFF*. SOOO, I changed the first three 
chapters already. Please note that I sometimes changed the verb from past to 
present time on purpose, it is supposed to give you a more 'lively' impression - 
though I'm highly suspicious now that it works in English... with my poor 
grammar...though it worked in German *SNIFF*



'THE YEARS IN-BETWEEN'



CHAPTER 1: BOSHIN WARS



Kyoto, December 30th, 3rd year of the Keiou era (1867)

Damn it! I was close to shattering the shamisen on the floor. Again it hadn't 
sounded like I had intended it.

We were staying at an house at the very end of Kyoto, near the forests together 
with the remaining Shinsen-gumi, their wives and their children. We were named 
Yamaguchi at the moment and it would not be our last name-change. 

Furtively I glanced at Hajime who wrote some reports kneeling beside me and 
registered the stifled smirk in his face, he knew how frustrated I was. No, I 
wouldn't give him the satisfaction of losing my temper! Teeth grinding I placed 
the instrument back on my thighs when I noticed someone in the door of our room, 
it was Nagakura obviously he wanted to talk with Hajime.

They would want to have sake and after an agreeing nod from Hajime I stood up to 
fetch it. Due to the freezing cold in the house I chose to serve them warm sake, 
there was always some heated in a larger pot placed in a water-kettle above the 
fire-place in the kitchen. I found some mochi and deciding they might want some 
snacks I put them together with the sake-pitcher and cups on trays.

When I came back, they had already settled down comfortable, facing each other 
and I placed the trays between them, poured them some sake. Nagakura casted an 
astonished and suspicious glance at me, he still wasn't used seeing me as a 
normal wife. His distraction didn't last very long and he turned his attention 
back on Hajime who had registered Nagakura's feeling of unease somehow proud and 
self-content.

I followed their conversation silently but attentive always caring to refill 
their cups when I realised that one was empty. To be precise I had to go several 
times back to the kitchen to get more sake, we didn't have many maids to take on 
this tiresome job and Nagakura as well as Hajime were partaking freely of the 
alcohol.

But what I was able to pick up was that the Ishinshishi prepared an attack in 
Kyoto and that the Shinsengumi would leave in the next morning to protect Kyoto 
once more and fight against the rebels.

This would be our last evening together for some time and despite the fact that 
I already heard of it, I felt sadness raising. I would miss Hajime during the 
next days and especially nights.



Kyoto, December 31th, 3rd year of the Keiou era (1867) 

On this morning I was woken up by the freezing cold in our room, I turned and 
watched Hajime's face. This day he would leave for a battle, a battle later 
called after the place: 'Toba and Fushimi'.

The sun was not risen yet and the blue light of the early morning let his 
features appear even sharper. In the chilling air and the cold light everything 
appeared clearer, more distinct to me. With my eyes I sucked in every little 
detail of his face, I wanted to be able to recall it while he was gone: 
The strands of his black hair falling over his eyes, even when he was awake they 
refused to be combed in his pony-tail. His characteristic high cheek-bones, his 
thin lips always tasting after his last cigarette or his last cup of sake. His 
narrow eyes, closed now, that I couldn't see his strong will, his intelligence, 
his cruelness, his mercilessness reflecting in them. 

I turned my gaze away from him and tried to recall him. It worked quite well. 
But there were more duties to fulfil this morning than daydreaming and secretly 
observing my husband.

Inwardly sighing I decided it would be best to stand up and prepare breakfast 
for us both, since it would be our last one together for undefined time. My 
movements disturbed Hajime, he stirred in his sleep and opened his eyes to small 
slits.

Murmuring he reached out his hand and pulled me under his blanket "Stay."

He laid his arm around my waist to make sure that I wouldn't escape and with my 
back resting on his chest the cold morning air did not feel so freezing anymore. 
Giggling I started to mock him.
"You don't want to have breakfast?"

It did not seem to work for he grumbled in my back and did not release me
"Not that kind of breakfast, Tokio."

Still giggling I snuggled closer, tugging the blanket firmly around us to 
exclude any breeze of air. I could almost feel his smirk in my back as his hand 
wandered under my yukata stopping at my breast, cupping it. Well, this was 
better than preparing breakfast. This morning promised to become a very 
interesting one.

He began to kiss my neck, pulled my yukata back and the cold sensation of the 
air sent shivers down my spine. Not very long and I felt his teeth scratching me 
teasingly, I couldn't help but laugh. It tickled when he breathed softly against 
the hairs in my neck, against their usual direction.

"Can't stand this, Tokio?"

He began to move his hand over my breast, taking my nipple between two of his 
slender fingers, squeezing it, then letting go only to pull it. THIS WAS TOO 
MUCH FOR THIS EARLY HOUR! Murmuring I pressed myself closer to his body, I felt 
his arousal against my bottom. A wonderful morning!

"WE HAVE TO LEAVE!" Suddenly the door was teared open, Hijikata standing in it.

Shock! Abruptly I threw my head back because of the unexpected interruption and 
with a clash the back of my head landed in Hajime's face. Turning I saw him 
holding his nose, blood appeared between his fingers and dropped on the futon. 

Maybe this morning wasn't as wonderful as it had promised to become and somewhat 
satisfied Hijikata registered my husband's bleeding, red spot in the middle of 
his features.

The deadly glare Hajime casted in my direction proofed me it would be better to 
stay quiet and to treat his injury. After I managed to stop the bleeding the 
best I could with some snow, Hajime left with the others for the final battle. 
It hadn't been enough time for an appropriate good-bye, all had waited for him 
to set off and his delay was my fault.

From the house I was waiting at, together with a few other wives, we could hear 
the cannon fire in the distance when the battle started the next day, a rolling 
thunder along the mountains. We exchanged astonished looks. They had cannons? 
The far scenery of a battle occurred surreal to me, without the usual clashing 
of swords and battle-cries, only hearing the cannon-fires channelled through the 
hills like a far away brewing storm.

We all tried to give our best to distract us till our men would return home and 
gradually the women began to sicken me with their chatting. I knew that they 
still talked behind my back about me and I chose to ignore them best I could.



One month later, 4th year of the Keiou era (1868) 

I waited anxiously for Hajime to return. I had heard what had happened, they had 
lost the battle of Toba and Fushimi with great loses on their side and I hoped 
that Hajime had survived. The bakufu was defeated.

Sitting in our room I tried to concentrate on something different than Hajime 
and read 'The three musketeers' once more. By now I was nearly through the book, 
only a few pages left and I was absorbed in reading. 

But I still perceived my surroundings due to my disturbed emotions. When I 
noticed some rumour outside, running footsteps, whispering, I knew: They were 
back. Deep inside I felt no fear, somehow I knew he was alive. Closing the book, 
the ending would wait for me, I stood up, shoved the door inside and walked down 
the corridor excitedly. Finally I would see him again.

I met him half-way downstairs, his proud posture, his self-confident smile, his 
arrogant features, his gleaming eyes. His slender figure steeled due to the 
training, I imagined his muscles under the thick layers of his clothing. A sight 
I had always recalled during the last few days when I was laying alone on our 
futon. 

His physical presence was overwhelming, even these cloth couldn't change that, I 
longed to reach out and touch him, feel him, feel his desire. Meeting his eyes, 
I knew he felt the same, but we were still on the steps were everyone could 
watch us. We both did not want to have one more talk with Kondou. 

I let him pass nodding our greeting at each other and followed him to our room 
in silence, I couldn't wait to be alone with him.

At last I could close the door behind me and exited I stepped closer, reaching 
out one hand to touch his back. This month I had spent without him appeared to 
me like an eternity. Was it possible to miss someone so much when you only knew 
him for such a short time? It was.

I longed for him to turn around and feel his touch, to look into his eyes. mmm, 
I snuggled closer to him, let my hands run under his kimono, down his chest, 
placed my head between his shoulder-blades.

"I'll have to go to Osaka."

Instantly I was aware. WHAT? He would go to Osaka? He had just returned! I knew 
my voice was rough "When?"

I felt his body tensing in my embrace, this must be bad news.

"Tomorrow morning."

"How long?"

"We will see."

That was it! He just returned, would leave so soon and didn't even know for how 
long! My mouth was dry 
"I'll come with you."

His body straightened up, his answer a blunt "No."

ENOUGH! I jumped up, threw my legs around his waist and one arm around his 
throat, choking him 
"I'll come with you."

"NO!"
He was still able to talk? I tightened my grip around his throat.

"What did you say, Hajime?"

His voice was reduced to a breathing "No!"

Tightening my grip threatening, I forced him to fall on his knees, silently 
wondering why he didn't made a defensive move.
"I want to came with you!"

He couldn't speak anymore, instead of answering he waved his hand denying, 
probably seeing stars. If I continued like that I wouldn't have a husband 
any-longer and I released him of my grip what sent him on his arms, gasping and 
coughing for air. 

When he turned to look at me I knew that the idea of leaving me here behind 
didn't please him as well. There would not much more I would have to do. Leaning 
forward I spoke to him in my sweetest voice.

"I know Osaka better than you." I placed a wide and self-confident smile on my 
face "I still have my sources there." I let the smile disappear faster then I 
put it on "And I know Shim-machi better than you." sincerely I looked at him "If 
I find out that you visit a brothel there you won't have the pleasure of seeing 
me around for...Let me think" I pretended to calculate and fixed his eyes with 
mine "...the rest of your life."

I was deadly serious and he knew it. He did not say one word, frightening him by 
telling him that I wouldn't share my bed with him any-longer worked quite well 
now.
"So you better take me with you, I'm as safe in Osaka as I am in Kyoto, maybe 
even more. I'm fed up with Kyoto. In addition to that" I laid a hand in his neck 
"You'll have the pleasure of my company."

He smirked and kissed me on my mouth. I knew I had his agreement to join the 
trip together with the others to Osaka.

With the first touch of my skin on his lips I felt that his restraint was gone, 
roughly he pulled me close to him, snuggling on my collarbone and biting me 
there. If he carried on like this, he would leave a visible mark on a place that 
was very exposed. One of his arms left my back, I felt him taking his swords out 
of his hakama and I heard the click as he un-sheathed one. 

What was that? I looked down and saw the drawn wakizashi in his hand. What was 
he doing? Shocked I watched as he cut his hakama and then tucked it between my 
kimono and obi. I tried to push him away, but his hold was too strong. Before I 
could even think of opening my mouth to protest, he lifted his head and claimed 
my mouth with his lips, smoothening my protest. With a flick of his hand he cut 
the obi. Again an expensive piece of our belongings was avictim to our desire, 
it was too late, so I could enjoy it as well. 

I closed my eyes and appreciated the feeling of his hands on my skin, of his 
presence, of his body-heat. A sensation I missed for one week now. 

Exited I felt his arousal against my centre and quickly I sat down on his lap 
accompanied by a pleasurable moan from him
"Welcome home, Hajime."

He wasn't capable of answering, he just leaned forward, laying me on my back. 
This was going to be a quick one, just for his satisfaction but he needed that 
woefully.

And really, when I let my hand wander under the kimono he was still wearing and 
threw my legs around his waist, the fastening movements of his hips indicated me 
that he already was close to the point, so that even the calming touch of my 
hands on his back didn't stop him. He lifted the upper part of his body, 
supported the weight with his forearms and laid his hands on my shoulders. He 
examined my face closely, intensely with his eyes, let his glance tracing down 
to my breast. As he noticed my hard nibbles erected in the cold air his last 
restraint was gone and with a determined, final deep movement he finished what 
he began. Visibly relieved he let himself drop on the tatami claiming the most 
possible space with his arms and legs.

"Looks like you needed it, Hajime." Lovingly I admired his sprawled, half-naked 
body beside me.

He smirked and lightened a cigarette while observing me intensely. A wicked grin 
crossed his features
"I saved it all for you."

Fighting down his urge to find release till he would meet me again was a good 
motivation to stay alive for him. Being asked I would say he could go on like 
that and I chuckled over the imagination. An over-sexed Hajime only concentrated 
to survive the next death-match to mate with his wife afterwards. 

I snuggled closer, laid my head on his uncomfortable hard chest waiting 
patiently for him to finish his cigarette and focusing his attention on me once 
more. This time it was my turn to be satisfied and I knew he would give his 
best, actually we did not find much sleep during this night.

The next morning we left for Osaka taking the horses to move quicker. In Osaka 
Kondou re-grouped the Shinsen-gumi and re-organised them. Many had lost their 
lives in the last battles. But a real slap in the face was that Yoshinobu 
resigned. The Bakumatsu was lost. Hiding their disappointment the members of the 
Shinsen-gumi decided to move to Edo and establish a resistance there.

So we set off for Edo short after reaching Osaka, I followed Hajime everywhere 
at this time. 

But we both didn't have one idea what horrible events awaited us in Edo: Kondou 
would have to face his death.

****

Edo, April 3rd, 4th year of the Keiou era (1868)

Late in the night I waited for Hajime to come home. We were broke, he did not 
earn one yen the last months and only due to the generosity of an old friend of 
Kondou we got a room in this house together with some foreigners whom we chose 
to ignore. At the moment we were the ones haunted and wanted by the government. 
We were outcasts and had to hide ourselves carefully.

Were was he? Usually he came home early, so this was really odd. I was fuming 
mad at him for not telling me where he had gone and already prepared a speech in 
my head. This guy was in BIG trouble. 

When I finally heard him entering, I kept my back faced to the entrance of our 
room on full purpose for some minutes, wanting to indicate how angry I was. But 
why he wasn't saying anything? 

At last I turned. WHAT WAS THAT? He leaned in the door-frame, barely in the 
position to hold himself straight, eyes glazed. He was drunk. I have never seen 
him in such an advanced stadium before and my anger raised even more. He had 
spent so much money on sake? Who did he thought we were? We had hardly enough 
money to afford food for us both! The smell of sake and blood emerging from him 
was undeniable and I saw that his cloth were soaked with blood on his front. He 
must have had some fights and killed someone.

With satisfaction I observed how he pushed himself off the door-frame and 
staggered into the middle of the room were he broke down with a loud clash. 
Directly on his face. 'Well, boy, that was what you deserved.' I stepped closer 
to him and lifted his head by his pony-tail. What was wrong? Why had he let 
himself slip so badly?

"Hajime! What happened?"

He was scarcely understandable with his mumbling and blubbering but what I was 
capable of picking up was
"They caught Kondou."

Shocked and turning up my nose about his alcoholic breath I dropped his head 
back to the ground. 

They caught Kondou? They would most probably execute him, this was an important 
news indeed. He had done so much for us, he was like a father for me. I felt a 
freezing hand reaching for my heart, clenching it, sending showers down my 
spine, this couldn't be true!

He was such a wonderful, warmhearted man! I still remembered what he told me 
after our first meeting, after the marriage meeting:
"I realise, by knowing your father and mother, you have their spirit. You have 
too much passion and obsession lying inside. Maybe you think you can go through, 
but believe me: You can't. You are cold-blooded when it comes to killing, but 
you are not cold-blooded about love. Okita-san is not the right man for you. You 
would leave him. I'm sure, you know that. You can't refuse and step back, so I 
have to do that. Marry Saitou-kun instead." 

Distracted I shook my head. Hajime had drunk too much sake, he had blood on his 
cloth and Kondou was in the hands of our enemies. This might be a problem and I 
forced myself to concentrate and not to get lost in memories.

Suspicious, with trembling hands I reached out for Hajime's swords and took them 
out of his hakama, he was in a coma-like sleep, what was no wonder estimating 
the alcohol he had to have in his veins.

I recalled Hajime's and mine first talk together with Kondou short after the 
'shouting-incident':
"I was afraid something like this would happen, but you two are sure quick. I 
can ignore a lot of things, for example your clothes scattered in the house, you 
waking us up in the morning or the evening. But I can't close my eyes, when you 
both shouting at each other like idiots and ruin the house."
"Tokio-san, you have to stick to the rules. I know, your parents were different, 
but I'm sure you know the tradition. He has every right to do what he did, he is 
your husband."

I smelled the blood on Hajime's katana before I saw it when un-sheathing the 
sword. He definitely had killed some men during this night. Most probably they 
had fought somewhere in Edo. Shrugging my shoulders I decided to clean his 
swords from most of the blood and fat on it briefly.

I had to suppress a smile when I remembered the incident that led to our next 
Kondou-talk: Hajime's cigarette had fallen on the tatamis and they had caught 
fire. This time Kondou had forced Hajime to apologise to me.
"Saitou-kun, apologise!"
"Why?" Saitou looked confused.
"Don't question me, Saitou-kun, the fire was your fault, apologise."

Taking a cloth and starting to wipe the blood and fat, the picture of an annoyed 
Kondou after the 'Hijikata-incident' crossed my mind:
"Apologise, you two!"
"Why? It was her fault!" Hajime had tried to protest, we both hadn't understood 
why he had to apologise also.
"Don't question me again, Saitou-kun. I can expect from my men, that they aren't 
distracted by someone entering the room."

Kondou's famous comment and demonstration for Hajime how to handle me after the 
'spider-incident':
"Saitou-kun?"
"What?"
"Learn to control this over-energetic wife of yours. She is driving me insane 
with her temper."
I had been annoyed that Kondou insulted me and interfered:
"Hey, you said it yourself! I'm different! I have my parent's spirits! I'm from 
Osaka! I'm
different!" One glance at Kondou's expression was enough. I shut up and bowed 
deeply, apologising
"I apologise to you all. I'm sorry."
Kondou giving Saitou a superior look.
"See, there is a way to get her doing what you want."

A thought crossed my mind and instantly my memories of Kondou and my sleepiness 
was washed away. My brain was functioning incredible slowly tonight! When Hajime 
had killed somebody and they had arrested Kondou there was a good chance they 
were looking for Hajime too. 

Quickly I moved over to him and turned him on his back. His haori as well as his 
kimono and hakama was soaked with blood, this was a problem. The lantern in one 
edge of the room was lit, illuminating the scenery in an unreal light. The light 
would be traitorous if they really searched him. Hastily I blew the candle out 
and as fast as I could in the darkness -luckily there was full moon tonight - I 
placed the futon on the blood in the tatamis, undressed Hajime, wrapped him in 
one of his yukatas and rolled him onto the futon. He protested in his sleep, but 
he never woke up. 

I took his pony-tail in one hand -he wasn't wearing his Shinsen-gumi head-band 
any-longer since Toba and Fushimi- and cut it of with one of my kunais I always 
had handy hidden in my clothes. He would kill me for this later, but what 
mattered it now.

Not one minute too late. I already heard footsteps on the floor. Quickly I cast 
a glance around. The swords were lying on the rack, they wouldn't stand a close 
observation, but for a short glimpse they were clean. My eyes fell on his 
cloth.No chance to get rid of them in this short time. Where I could hide them? 
They had reached the second floor, I heard them charging into the first room. 
WHAT TO DO WITH THE BLOODY CLOTH? 

"HOUSE SEARCH!"

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

To be continued...

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started: April 12th 2002
edited by Morgane: May 4th 2002
finished: May 5th 2002
first posted: May 7th 2002 


Ja ne,

Mara