April 6, 2003

Last weekend left me a little off-balance. It may have been the end of my 40 hour volunteer training seminar. Or going out to the bar with friends and playing babysitter until the wee hours of the morning. Or perhaps it was the four hours of sleep followed by six hours of work. Or helping a friend move when she has no idea where she wants to be in the first place.

Or maybe it was because all these things were crammed into a two day period, the weekend, the only time it seems people can sit down and figure out what the past five workdays were about.

All I know is that in all those incidents above, I was needed. And it feels satisfying to be needed. But I've gone down that road before (or maybe I never left) where you need to be needed, which turns into a want. A want too dependent on other people. And what happends if you aren't needed? What do you do then?

Right now? I think I need to sleep.