by Saler
The party earlier in the day had been a great success, and he and his men had been the centre of attention, but now they were on the wrong side of the bars again.
He stood uncomfortably to attention in the inadequate space behind the full-length Plexiglass window. The light was dim, but across the room he could see his men confined in small individual boxes.
His men �
CHIEF � standing motionless, his dark eyes gazing out with their familiar faraway look.
ACTOR � looking relaxed and almost resigned, but Garrison knew that his brain would be working overtime on some devious plan to get them out.
CASINO � a caged animal, looking as if he would begin pacing up and down any second.
GONIFF � his blue eyes constantly checking for anything he could make use of to help them escape.
Garrison had truly thought that they would manage to keep out of trouble, but here they were, as he had originally found them � behind prison bars. It was strange to see them like that again after all the time they had spent together, and to his eyes it did not look right. He, more than anyone, knew their capabilities, and how far they had come from their origins. He wondered again at the unfairness of the world, and was determined to do whatever it would take to free them from their latest incarceration.
Unexpectedly, the main door began to swing open and the area was flooded with bright light. Garrison saw two figures silhouetted against the brightness. He froze � surprised by the interruption. Only the movement of his eyes betrayed the fact that he was aware of their presence, but he hoped that the newcomers were too far away to notice.
He could see that one of the men wore what looked like uniform of some kind, and the other had a badge that reflected the light, but, with the bright light behind them, he could make out no other details with certainty. He watched as they drew close to his position, stopping on the other side of the plexiglass, between him and his men. What he saw surprised him, but he kept his face neutral and waited for them to speak.
"Lt Garrison?" the taller one asked. "We wondered if you and your men would be interested in a mission?"
"We need an experienced team for a very important and difficult job; do you think your men would volunteer?" the other added.
"They can't do anything while they're locked up," Garrison replied, gesturing toward his men with an inclination of his head. "They'll need to be released before we can talk," he bargained.
"No problem. Just give us a few minutes to make the necessary arrangements, and we'll be back." The two conferred briefly, then walked toward the cells. Just what was going on?
Garrison watched as the pair disappeared from his sight. Who were they, and how did they have so much pull?
-oOo-
A short while later, Garrison, Goniff, Casino and Chief stood in a knot waiting for Actor, the last one to be freed. The cons were exchanging telling glances, but not saying a word: They'd spent enough time in prison to know that this was not the time for an uninvited remark. Actor joined them, fastidiously straightening his jacket as he did so. He looked at Garrison with a quizzically raised eyebrow, but remained silent. Garrison realised it was up to him to ask the questions everyone was thinking.
He waited for their liberators to join the group. "Why?" he asked.
"Why? Why what?"
"Why did you release them?"
"We told you, we need your help."
"Who's 'we'?" Garrison pushed. A cowboy sheriff, and a...a...what was he? Was that a fishbowl he was wearing on his head? Just what was going on?
The pair looked at each other, then sheepishly turned back to the men. "Sorry, I guess we kinda forgot. I'm Sheriff Woody."
"Buzz Lightyear, at your service," the other added in a dramatic tone.
Goniff could contain himself no longer. "What on earth is that you're wearing?" he had to ask.
"Just my uniform," Buzz replied, defensively. "Star Command."
Goniff looked at him in disbelief, but it was Casino who asked the next question: "You're a spaceman?" he asked sceptically, walking around behind him to study, more closely, the wings folded on his back. "Do these things fly?"
When he received an answer in the affirmative, he let out a small whistle. "Wow, Warden, we could have done with one of these a few times, eh?"
Garrison took no notice of Casino, wanting instead to know "Where are we? What is this place?"
The cowboy looked back at him understandingly. It had been a long time since he'd first arrived here, but he hadn't forgotten how strange he'd felt at first. "We're in Andy's closet," he explained. "He put you back in your boxes after the birthday party, but don't worry, that won't last long. He's always careful with new toys, but give him a few days and you'll be left out in the play room with the rest of us."
"The rest of you?"
"The other toys � come on, we'll introduce you."
-oOo-
As they entered the other room, a strange sight met their eyes � gathered together was the weirdest conglomeration of beings they had ever encountered. Woody introduced them to Rex, Etchy, Slinky Dog, Hamm and Bo Peep, who was over by the book shelf with an obviously distraught Mrs Potato Head.
As the others acknowledged the introductions, Goniff noticed some other occupants of the room. "Who are those little green guys with three eyes?" he wanted to know, peering at the minuscule oddities with unconcealed curiosity. The multiple eyes stared back at him.
"Oh, they're just the Aliens."
"Aliens?"
"Don't worry, they're harmless. We found them in a gumball machine and they kind of adopted us," Buzz explained offhandedly, before turning back to the assembled group.
Goniff gave them a long, sceptical look, before rejoining his team mates. He tried to ignore them, but all those eyes unsettled him: He could feel them looking at him and kept stealing glances over his shoulder. This certainly seemed like it was going to be a different life from the one they were used to.
"You said you had a mission for us?" Garrison had to raise his voice to speak to Woody over the chattering of the toys, who were gathered around the newcomers and all talking at once. "What kind of a mission?" The hubbub subsided and everyone listened as Woody explained.
"We've lost somebody," the cowboy replied. "Mr Potato Head. We think he got left outside after Andy's birthday party."
"He's not here! He's not here!" Mrs Potato Head wailed as Bo Peep comforted her. "He's outside somewhere. Alone! Lost!" With that, she dissolved into tears again.
"We need you to mount a search for him," Woody advised them.
"Why do you need us? Can't you go yourself? You and Buzz?"
"Well, we could try, but now you and your men are here�" Woody said, as if it explained everything.
The five men looked at him, but nobody spoke.
"Well, you're trained in this sort of thing, and you have the experience," he continued when that elicited no response. "It should be just like old times for you � except without being shot at," he finished with a hopeful, ingratiating smile.
"We thought you might like to keep your hand in," Buzz added.
"But what about Andy?" Actor enquired. "And the rest of the family?"
"They've gone out to dinner for Andy's birthday," Slinky piped up. "They won't be back till much later."
Garrison bowed to the inevitable. "OK, I guess we can give it our best shot. How do you get us outside?" he asked. "I suppose you do have a way out?"
"Oh, that's the easy bit," Woody enthused. "We just open the window over there and climb down the tree to the ground. We've done it before. Come over to the window, and I'll show you." He led the way across the room and showed them the way down. The guys followed him over and peered out, surveying the back yard with assistance from Lenny the binoculars.
"That's a lot of ground to cover," Chief commented. "How are we supposed to know where to start?"
"That's something we'll need to figure out. The first thing we need is a plan of the whole area," Garrison decided. "Can you help us with that, Woody?"
Woody called Etchy over, and together, with input from the rest of the toys, they produced a detailed map of the back yard, showing the paths, flower beds, sand pit, bird bath, and even the empty dog kennel.
"Where was Mr Potato Head last seen?" Garrison asked, once he had copied the map onto a sheet of paper.
"I saw him near the sand pit," Slinky told them.
"There's a lot of long grass down in that area, he could easily have got lost there," Buzz agreed, pointing.
"Or near the rose bushes," Rex piped up. "I saw him over there, too."
"Oh, no! Not the rose bushes!" Mrs Potato Head wailed. "That's a death trap!"
Bo Peep glared at the dinosaur as she tried to calm the distraught woman again.
"Well, I did," he muttered, moving over by Casino, who eyed him with suspicion.
"Don't worry," Actor said to Mrs Potato Head, in his most soothing voice. He patted her hand comfortingly, and gave Bo Peep the benefit of his most dazzling smile while he was at it. She blushed prettily and coyly batted her eyelashes at him. "We'll do our very best to find him," he assured them both.
"I'll come down with you and show you where he was last seen," Woody offered, "and if there's anything else any of us can do, just ask."
"Oh, don't worry," Casino responded, "we will!"
Just then, Garrison was confronted by a troop of green plastic soldiers. The sergeant saluted smartly. "Reporting for duty, sir!" he barked, as his men formed up behind him. "How can we help?"
The Lieutenant looked a little stunned at suddenly acquiring a large group of tiny soldiers, but he was used to taking charge and soon recovered. "Can you and your men rig up a rope by the window, so that we can lower a basket?"
"Yes, sir!" the sergeant responded briskly, saluting again before executing a perfect about-face and addressing his men. "You heard the lieutenant," he ordered. "Let's move, move, move!"
"Who are they trying to impress?" Goniff whispered to Casino.
"I bet the Warden'll be thrilled to have some real soldiers to boss around," Casino responded.
Garrison may have heard the exchange, but he gave no outward sign. Turning back to his map, he compared it with the view from the window, shading his eyes against the setting sun.
-oOo-
With Woody showing the way, the team climbed down the tree outside the window and assembled on the ground. The evening sun was low in the sky, casting grotesque shadows among the plants and making everything seem even more surreal to the miniaturised Gorillas.
"This is weird," Goniff puzzled, measuring himself against a tall lilium. "Everything's bigger than us. These flowers are as big as trees!"
"Just think of all the small spaces you can get into," Garrison told him, "and, don't forget, there won't be any Germans out there shooting at us, either."
"Hey, yeah! I hadn't thought of that," Goniff replied cheerily. "We really can 'tiptoe through the tulips', can't we?" he added with a grin, breaking into a soft-shoe shuffle to illustrate.
"Oh great! So how're we supposed to tiptoe through this, then?" demanded a familiar voice. Garrison turned and saw the unmistakable figure of Casino silhouetted against a huge clump of pampas grass.
"We don't, Casino," he informed the safe cracker. "We go around it."
"We have to get used to looking at things from our new perspective," Actor reminded them. "Think of it as a challenge."
'You can think of it as a challenge, if you want," came the dissatisfied safe man's voice again.
'That's enough, Casino!" Garrison interrupted him. "Come over here." He took out his map and spread it out for them all to see.
"So, why can't we do this in daylight?" Casino continued to grumble as he joined them. "At least we'd be able to see properly, then."
"Because the people would be able to see us, too," Woody explained again.
"Oh, yeah. Right." The safe man shrugged and rolled his eyes, but accepted the explanation.
"Can you see anything?" Garrison called to Chief, who was checking out the area from up in the tree.
"No, but, like Buzz said, there's plenty of long grass near the sand pit," Chief's voice filtered down through the branches. "Maybe we should check that out first?"
"We'll start there and work our way back in this direction," Garrison concurred, checking his map, as Chief joined them. He led the way over to the sand pit, where the men spread out to check the surrounding area � each searching a different section, pushing through the thick undergrowth and looking under the groundcover as they went.
Suddenly, Casino let out a yell. "Hey! I found something!"
The others hurried over to see him turning a pink plastic shape over and over in his hands. "What d'ya reckon this is?"
"I know what it looks like," Goniff interjected. "It looks like a big pink ear."
Garrison called Woody over. "Could this be part of Mr Potato Head?" he asked.
Woody looked closely at the object. "Could be," the cowboy agreed. "I'll send it up and see if his wife can identify it."
He walked over and placed it in the basket that was hanging down from the window and tugged the cord. The Sarge and his men swung into action, pulling on the string till the basket reached the window and was pulled inside. Beneath the window, the searchers heard a squeal and a bump � Mrs Potato Head had fainted again.
"I guess that answers your question," Woody remarked.
"OK, we'll concentrate in this area," Garrison announced. "Spread out and make sure you check under all the plants."
Suddenly, there was a rustling nearby, and a large ginger cat leapt out from behind a clump of agapanthus. Seizing Chief by the left arm, it disappeared back into the undergrowth before anyone could move.
"Gawd! What was that?" Goniff yelped. The guys were frozen in place for two interminable seconds, then Garrison came to his senses and, grabbing a stick, went after the creature, swiftly followed by the others, and they all charged through the underbrush at full tilt.
Emerging on the other side of the shrubbery, they were just in time to see a tail disappearing into the rose bed on the other side of the path. "Come on!" Garrison yelled, racing off again, not even pausing to check that they were behind him. "We have to catch that cat before it gets out of the yard."
Ahead, they could hear Chief's muffled groans as he was dragged along through the thorny rose bushes. Casino complained about the thorns but, as usual, no one listened: No one had the time. On the other side of the roses, they were stopped short by a high brick wall. It was obvious the cat wouldn't have been able to leap it carrying its burden, so they split up, Garrison and Casino went left; Actor and Goniff to the right.
A short while later, Garrison and Casino confronted their quarry. In the corner of the wall, under a spreading rhododendron bush, the cat was waiting; snarling and spitting at them through bared fangs. Garrison pulled up short, causing Casino to almost run into him. They backed off until they were under the cover of a neighbouring shrub. "Actor! Goniff! This way!" the lieutenant called.
Actor and Goniff rushed up, stopping in their tracks when they saw the cat. The sheer size of the beast was awe-inspiring: In their miniaturised state, it was like an elephant-sized Bengal tiger! Definitely not your average friendly, furry kitty.
Of Chief there was no sign, but a faint moaning betrayed his presence nearby. Behind the cat they could make out an old wooden box turned on its side. In its dark interior Garrison thought he saw a darker shape: Could that be his man?
"Are you in there, Chief?" Garrison shouted over the animal's snarling. A louder moan. "We need something to lure that cat out of there," he thought aloud.
"I have an idea, Warden," Goniff piped up. "I'll just need to get some rope."
"You planning on hog-tying that cat?" Casino asked facetiously.
'You'll see," the thief replied with a cheeky grin. As he disappeared back toward the house, they heard him call, "Woody, I need your 'elp."
When he reappeared, he was pulling the end of a long piece of string behind him. Woody was with him, helping to drag it across the ground. Between them, they pulled up the string until Goniff had several coils in his hand. "Now I need something to tie on the end," the Brit said, looking around.
"What are you planning, Goniff?" Actor asked, perplexed.
"It's a cat, isn't it?" Goniff responded. "Cats like to chase things, don't they?"
"Brilliant!" Garrison exclaimed, understanding what the Limey was planning.
"How about this?" asked Woody, removing his red bandanna.
"That'll do just fine." Goniff took the cloth from the cowboy and tied it to the end of the string.
"You sure you know what you're doing, Limey?" Casino asked, unconvinced.
"Just watch and learn, Casino," Goniff responded, checking that the bandanna was firmly attached.
"Now, you lot keep still and get ready to move fast," he told the others as he took the coil of string and headed around to the other side of the clearing.
Moving quietly, he found a new position, away from the others, then, getting as close as he dared, he flung the coils in the animal's direction. The cat gave a momentary glance at the object that landed on the ground close to the bush that sheltered him, then, deciding it was harmless, turned its attention back to the figures huddled under the shrubbery. Following Goniff's instructions, they all kept very still.
On the far side of the clearing, Goniff jiggled the string, making the red bandanna move slightly. That got the cat's interest. "Here, kitty, kitty," he called softly, pulling the string again.
The cat was now giving the decoy its full attention. Goniff again tweaked the string, moving it ever-so-slightly away from the cat, who took a step in that direction. Another tweak; another step. Then the cat reached out to pat at the thing. Goniff allowed it one pat, then pulled the lure further away. The cat leapt, but the bandanna was already disappearing into the undergrowth. With a yowl, the animal ran after it.
"Quick, Warden! Now's your chance!"
As one, the three men ran across to the box under the bush, where Goniff joined them. Inside, they found Chief, lying semi-conscious on a pile of rags. As Garrison and Casino lifted the Indian between them, Actor shone his flashlight around the interior of the lair. In one of the back corners, he spotted something. "Goniff, give me a hand here," he called as he went to investigate.
"What'd you find?" the Brit asked, as he joined him. "Omigawd! What's that?" he exclaimed as the light picked out a brown shape in the back corner.
"I think we have found the object of our search," the conman replied.
"But, 'e's all over the place."
"Then we'd better put him back together again, hadn't we?" the Italian replied reasonably, picking up a black plastic shoe.
Goniff collected a pair of lips, along with a handlebar moustache and another ear.
"We'll need a lot more parts before we can move him," Actor advised. "Let's try the other corner."
Between them, they found the other shoe and some other vital parts of Mr Potato Head's anatomy and reassembled him until he was able to speak. "Oh, thank you, thank you," he rambled. "Where am I? Do you think you could find my eyes?" Actor took the flashlight and searched under the debris outside the box, locating the missing eyes and even a hat. Mr Potato Head dusted them off and stuck them into the appropriate holes � "Wow! Where am I?" he wanted to know, looking around him.
"You're in a box under a bush at the bottom of the yard," Actor explained. "It would seem that you were kidnapped by a cat."
"Did you say a bat?" Mr Potato Head said. "I don't remember anything."
"No, a cat," Goniff repeated. "You know, 'meow'!"
"A cat? You'll have to speak up, I've only got one ear, you know," Mr Potato Head reminded them.
"A dirty great ginger moggy," Goniff expanded, speaking loudly. "We came to look for you and 'e snaffled one of our blokes, too."
"Can you walk?" Actor interrupted. "I really don't think we should stay here any longer than necessary. That cat could return at any time."
"Good thinkin', mate," Goniff agreed. "Let's get goin'."
Between them, they got Mr Potato Head to his feet and helped him back toward the house. They kept their eyes open but did not see any sign of the cat.
When they arrived at the tree, Chief had already been sent up in the basket, and Garrison was conferring with Woody, who was explaining how Goniff's ruse had worked � "�we ran the string between the trees and fastened the other end to RC, Andy's remote control car. When Goniff gave the signal, Buzz just set the car off and the cat chased it. Simple."
"Top marks for original thinking, Goniff!" the lieutenant praised him.
"Well, me mum 'ad a cat once, a big fluffy tabby, name of 'ercules, 'e was, and 'e always liked to chase stuff," the thief explained. "So I figured this one might, too."
"Fancy you comin' up with a plan!" Casino commented. "And it worked great!"
"Either you've got it or you 'aven't," the Cockney acknowledged, without a hint of modesty, as he took his turn in the basket lift.
-oOo-
Back up in the room, Mrs Potato Head thanked the Gorillas effusively, before rushing over to her husband to check that he had all his parts attached � he had, except for the ear that Casino had found earlier, but Slinky Dog fetched it for her and she soon had him fixed up to her satisfaction.
Actor checked Chief's arm. Luckily, he wasn't badly injured - plastic was a lot more resilient than flesh and blood, and, apart from a few snags on his red sweater, he would be good as new in no time.
The rest of the toys were gathered around Mr Potato Head and his rescuers, enthusiastically welcoming him home and wanting to know what had happened 'outside'. Woody and Buzz told them the story of the great adventure, enthusiastically describing in great detail how their new friends had carried out the rescue.
"Oh, you're all so brave!" Rex sighed. "I wish I was that brave."
Bo Peep rewarded them each with a kiss on the cheek, which they all accepted gallantly. "This job could have its good points," Actor observed.
"Just wait till you meet Andy's sister's Barbie dolls," Hamm advised them on the quiet. "Now that's something to look forward to!"
"Hey, Warden, maybe this life won't be so bad after all," Casino conceded.
Before Garrison could respond, Woody interrupted them. "Quick! A car just turned into the drive. The family's back. We need to get you all back into your boxes. Now!"
As they hurried across the floor, they could hear Sarge taking charge: "Juvenile intrusion! Repeat! Juvenile intrusion! Everyone resume your positions immediately!" The green men quickly jumped back into their Bucket o'Soldiers while the other toys scattered back to their usual places.
Woody hustled the guys back to the closet, and, together, he and Buzz helped them climb back into their cardboard and plastic cells.
"Thanks again, guys," Woody called before the two of them left, hurrying to get back to their own positions before Andy came up to his room. "Seeya soon."
"Bye, Woody. Our pleasure," they replied in chorus.
"Good night."
Before the door closed, leaving them in the dark, Garrison caught a last glimpse of his men. Opposite, the four were looking back at him. They were back in confinement again behind the painted bars but, this time, they all knew that it was only a temporary situation, and their expressions were now hopeful, no longer haunted. Goniff even managed a cheeky grin. "Seeya on the outside, Warden," he called, as the light disappeared.
