Manoj's
modern love letters
BOY'S PROPOSAL
Dearest Girl,
I am very happy to inform you that I have fallen in love with you since
Tuesday, the 17th of August 1999.
With reference to the meeting held between us on the 17th of August 1999 at 1500
hours, I would like to present myself as a prospective lover.Our love affair
would be on probation for a period of three months and depending on
compatibility, would be made permanent. Of course, upon completion of probation,
there will be continuous on-the-relationship training and relationship appraisal
schemes leading up to promotion from lover to spouse. The expenses incurred for
coffee and entertainment would initially be shared equally between us. Later,
based on your performance,I might take up a larger share of the expenses.
However I am broad-minded enough, to be taken care of, on your expense account. I request you to kindly respond within 30 days of receiving this letter, failing which, this offer would be cancelled without further notice and I shall be considering someone else. I would be happy, if you could forward this letter to your sister, if you do not wish to take up this offer.
Thanking you in anticipation.
Yours sincerely,
[Boy]
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GIRL'S REPLY
Dear Boy,
Please refer to your letter dated today. I am pleased to inform you that I hope
to accept your proposal for romance. However, you should be informed that there
are certain conditions of acceptance.Promotional prospects are to my
satisfaction.However, please enlighten me as to your retirement benefits.
Gratuity should be generous. I also need to be assured that there is sufficient
security with regards to this commitment. If there is any chance at all of
retrenchment or consequent disinterest on your part, then I should receive
monetary compensation according to union standards. Due to the nature of my
position, I am sure you will agree that an expense account should be arranged
for my access in light of the 'VIP'I shall be entertaining. In addition, ousing
and transport allowances should be in order and nothing less than a luxury condo
and a Jag are in order.
Please also note that there should be no moonlighting restrictions placed on
myself. If you are still interested in the relationship, please reply on an
urgent basis as other prospective lovers have sent indications of interest.
Please also note that my sister is happily employed.
Yours perhaps,
[Girl]