Speaking to whom this page concerns:
I know I am probably going to get the "silent treatment", or even worse, but I need to express how I feel the only way I know how, through typing...I know you can't understand this now, but I want people to know how I feel...I have so much love inside me, I feel like I'd burst if I didn't release it somehow.
Ok, with that said, for those who don't know, this woman is someone I met last summer at camp.
She was the head cook.
When I first met her, She looked at me and smiled...and that's all it took.
After that, I became absolutely infatuated with her.
I visited her frequently during the day.
Ok, this will sound corny I know...but bear with me, I feel very passionately about this.
She has the most beautiful red hair I've ever seen. Such fiery soft red hair.
I love her eyes. As blue as a crystal clear sky and twice as heavenly. I can't look her in the eyes for fear of drowning in them. The way her eyes light up when something strikes her as funny or interesting. The looks she gives me with those eyes, anytime I do something wrong, or say something funny, make me want to melt.
Her smile...oh her smile is the greatest. Her beautiful smile harbors such a sweet voice.
Her personality, her character, her sense of humor, her passion, her energy, and her physical prowess make her the closest thing I've seen to an angel.
These words can't even begin to describe how beautiful she is. I have such a deep feeling of compassion and love for her...
I know she doesn't feel the same way, but I want so much to make her happy. I can't describe how happy I am to be her friend, but I want to be there for her when she is hurt...not just as a friend, but as someone she can intimately confide in. I know guys have hounded her all her life...and I suppose in a way I can't blame them. Just once though, I'd like to be able to show her that I would dedicate my life to her. I would sacrifice everything just to be with her, and would do anything for her. She means so much to me...she's the first and only girl I have ever felt so passionately about...
When she hurts, I want to hold her in my arms and be able to tell her everything will be alright. I don't have much money...and I don't have looks. I have devotion, and love, and a caring personality.
I've watched her go from one bad relationship to another...and while it hurts me, I continue to pray for her that she finds the right person, even if it's not me. She deserves so much to be happy, and anyone who is blessed with her love I would pray will make her happy.
I just have such strong feelings for her...and I'm not very aesthetically pleasing to the eye to most people...
Please don't think I'm trying to "guilt trip" you into anything. I wouldn't be able to live with myself if anyone went out with me out of guilt. I don't expect you to throw yourself at me, hell, I don't even expect you to feel remotely the same way towards me.
But I want you to know, I will always be here for you. I care so much for you.
When you called me that day to tell me you were getting married...I...
I know I'm not the type you're looking for...but if you ever think twice about it...you know how to find me.
If you aren't mad at me for this and still want to go to the reunion with me, we could talk about this more (if you want to)...and/or you could call me anytime day or night on my cell.
Your voice is always welcome in my heart.
God bless you Rayna...The Lord broke the mold when he made you...
And it breaks my heart when I see you hurting...